Tube money heading 2013

Now come on. Just because you are unemployed and you’re getting your $256.00 a week from the federal government you act like somehow Barrack and Michelle shouldn’t rush off for a couple of weeks to Hawaii to get out of the cold.

If you are so upset about it then get a job. Then you too can take a vacation.

Now the President says that we are recovering and hell yes! Even Tubularsock can see recovery from the golf course in Hawaii! If some of you working poor would take up golf then you might be able to see recovery too.

Now I’m sure you are aware that Congress is working hard at not working. And they do do a nice job at it. Pretty professional if you ask Tubularsock.

The Democrats want to extend the emergency unemployment benefits for 1.3 million people. These are unemployment benefits that kick in AFTER state unemployment benefits are cut off. Just how much money do these unemployed people need?

As Peter Morici, an EMPLOYED economist and professor at the University of Maryland School of Business stated in a UPI analysis, “with the recovery in its 55th month, the emergency is over. Additional taxes to pay for more unemployment benefits would impose a terrible burden on the working poor”.

Wow. Those poor working poor. You see Morici contends that, “Unduly long unemployment benefits in an economy the president says is picking up steam encourages many unemployed to postpone serious employment searches. From Wall Street to Main Street, white collar professionals have delayed accepting lower pay and changing occupations by running down savings and collecting maximum unemployment benefits of about $300 a week.” A princely sum indeed!

So if only those “white collar professionals” would get off their fucking high horses and take a job at McDonalds or WalMart or even change their occupations to say being an economist then life would be good!

It is so simple if you just think about it from an ivory tower or a golf course from Hawaii don’t you know.

But with all this unemployment talk one can miss some of the more positive aspects of the Washington, D.C. scene.

Now Barrack and Michelle went off to Hawaii for vacation on Air Force One.

According to Congressional Research Service the cost of flying a Boeing 747 is $181,757.00 per flight hour. Travel time direct from Washington, D.C. to Hawaii is about 9 hours. So one way the cost, JUST TO FLY, is $1,635,813.00. Oh sure, they have to come back so add an additional One Million Six Hundred And Thirty Five Thousand Eight Hundred And Thirteen Dollars to the mix. Envelope pleze ……. the grand total is ……… THREE MILLION TWO HUNDRED AND SEVENTY ONE THOUSAND SIX HUNDRED AND TWENTY TWO DOLLARS! And that is just for Barrack and Michelle to fly to their vacation and home again. I guess they may have had to max out two credit cards.

Now what’s a vacation without the amenities of home. So a USAF C-14 cargo aircraft is needed to transport the Presidential limos (you can’t go on vacation without your ride!) and support equipment.

A C-14 has an estimated operating cost of $12,000 per hour and the flight time between Andrews Air Force Base and Hawaii is at about 21.5 hours roundtrip. So that is $258,000.00.

And don’t forget that the United States Marine Corps provides a Presidential Helicopter which is transported by a C-17 cargo aircraft for an  additional $258,000.00.

Now that doesn’t include the 6 member helicopter crew’s per diem and hotel.

 Wow ……… this vacation thing is stacking up some costs.

Tubularsock needs to take a break here. Just checking my wallet.

Ok ……… now that we’ve got them to Hawaii there is a bit more expense.

The taxpayers must cover the costs for housing U.S. Secret Service, U.S. Coast Guard and Navy Seals in beach front and canal front homes around where the President stays.

That cost runs about $200.00 per bedroom per day which comes to $21,600.00 per day. That’s about $21,600.00 per average home for a nearly three week period, with special forces renting at least 7 homes. Which comes to $151,200.00 Plus $25,200.00 for the security that arrives ahead of the President. Costing taxpayers about $176,400 for the length of the visit.

The President’s staff and White House Press Corps typically stay at one of Hawaii’s oldest and most elegant hotels, the Moana Surfrider. And wouldn’t you know it is during high season so there is no discount government rate during this holiday period! So the taxpayers are covering more than $131,600 in hotel bills for some two dozen staff.

Now like any good government operation there are some costs that can’t be released by the White House to the general public for SECURITY REASONS!

For example, the President’s security usually rents an entire floor of an office building in Kailua on the canal during the president’s stay. And you know just how important it is to not let anyone know what rents go for in Kailua. Lives could be lost!

And then there is the cost for car rentals and fuel for White House staff staying at a Waikiki Hotel. If these facts were allowed to be leaked well, lives could be lost!

And there are additional travel costs Secret Service and White House staff traveling ahead of the President that may involve strip clubs and whores being vetted that must be kept secret because lives could be lost!

But if you take the total known cost for Barrack and Michelle’s Hawaii vacation it adds up to over FOUR MILLION DOLLARS!

But hey, before you get all pushed out of shape here just remember that that is only about $307.60 for each of the 1.3 million unemployed that have lost their coverage.

And that is only $7.60 more than their maximum amount per week.

So for the cost of Barrack and Michelle’s vacation 1.3 MILLION people would have had one week more of unemployment benefits to feed their families. Fuck’em!

But like Tubularsock likes to say ………. There’s More!

You see, Barrack and the girls returned to Washington, D.C. and Michelle  stayed on in Hawaii. Which may end up costing the taxpayers an additional $126,000.00.

Michelle in the past has used an Air Force C- 40B Special Mission Aircraft when she has flown before to Hawaii, the cost of a flight from Honolulu to Washington would be about $63,000. If the C-40B must be flown out to Hawaii to retrieve Michelle, as would seem likely, the first lady’s travel costs could amount to about $126,000, assuming the jet is dispatched from Washington.

And then there’s the Secret Service and personal staff ….. ahh, the price keeps going up.

Rumor has it that the Presidential couple were not in matrimonial bliss during their several million dollar vacation.

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Some attribute it to the Mandela Memorial and other photographs in the press, it seems that Michelle is not very happy with the President of late. Michelle remaining in Hawaii away from the President is just fueling speculation that they may be heading for a divorce in 2014.

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But what TMZ Celebrity Gossip and Entertainment News should have reported is that there may be more to this entire situation. A photo acquired by Tubularsock News Corp. from sources that are not authorized to provide photos of the Hawaii Vacation presents an entirely different scenario  that must be considered.

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It has been rumored that Michelle and an unknown political gigolo have been having some “quality” time after Barrack and the girls left for Washington. But Michelle’s staff have categorically denied any such thing.

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Comments
  1. The problem in Hawaii doesn’t surprise me. According to Webster Tarpley’s unauthorized biography of Obama, it’s well known in Chicago that the President bats for the other side.

    In your expert opinion, does Tubularsocks believe the recent UN report on edible insects have anything to do with the worsening depression (http://www.fao.org/docrep/018/i3253e/i3253e.pdf)?

    After reading the report I looked up some cricket recipes (which I plan to publish on my blog). They really look delicious (you have to first remove the antennae and legs), but God they’re hard to catch. Do you think it might have something to do with my advanced age?

    Now garden snails are a different story. I can catch about 20 in 30 minutes, and Gordon Ramsay has some excellent recipes for preparing them.

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    • tubularsock says:

      Well Obama has always been siding with the big boys and that is why I was so surprised that his branding worked so will and got him from an unknown Senator into the office of President without having to pass GO but still collecting $200. A bit of a variant from regular Monopoly rules. But having his parents connected with the CIA may have helped as well.

      As far as my expert opinion on insect consumption, it would sure lead Tubularsock to depression. Thanks for that link by the way.

      But don’t worry too much because by the time Monsanto finishes copyrighting crickets and filling them with GMO products they will be slower and you will not have to become younger to catch your allotted supply. Trust Tubularsock on this!

      Snails on the other hand my become faster with the induction of the Fukushima effect.

      Thank you for taking the time to comment and bonappetit.

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  2. MisBehaved Woman says:

    But think of all the tourism dollars that just poured into Hawaii, Tubular! I’m sure the Prez and Missus were just trying to do their part to give the local economy a boost…this vacay was probably a terrible sacrifice for them and yet…they dug down deep (into our pockets) and managed to give anyways…tis so beautiful (er, beautifully fucked) that it brings a tear to the eye, doesn’t it?

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    • tubularsock says:

      MB, how callous Tubularsock can sometimes be! After reading your comment Tubularsock had tears streaming down his face. Our pockets are deep and their sacrifice is obvious now that you have brought it to my attention. Thanks.

      At least now we can get back to droning more children!

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  3. Well, Michelle DID say that America’s children need to go on a diet. So, there you have it! Diet by starvation while she flies fabulous at fifty! “Let them eat cake!, and all that, you know! Starve the peons and they’ll have no choice but to lose weight. This diet is going to be ALL the rage, doncha know!

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    • tubularsock says:

      Ah yes. Michelle is just another Black sell out as you so aptly stated about the others on your blog post The Dreamers @ ShelbyCourtland.
      Thank you for your honest insights, Tubularsock appreciates it.

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