Welcome to TUBULARSOCK EMPORIUM OF GOODS, Ltd.
You know, we are way overstocked with our speciality goods and we just have to move them out of our warehouses and into your home.
AND YOUR AMERICAN FAMILY JUST NEVER HAS ENOUGH OF THESE!
And we here at TUBULARSOCK EMPORIUM OF GOODS, Ltd. are offering our overstocked items not only at rock bottom prices but we have created two covenant sizes for your discriminatory taste.
The tiny and the JUMBO!
Priced to sell ………….
STOCK UP TODAY!***
Tubularsock 
Sorry, but I’m pretty stocked up on cynicism and rage! And I found I am allergic to hypocrisy, so I’m trying to pawn off my left over bags on the neighbors I don’t like. They seem to thrive on it!
You don’t have any bags of weed this size, do ya? My glaucoma is killing me, or is it just my need to get totally fucked up?
I seem to be fixated on being drunk or stoned, don’t I?
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Well sojourner, Tubularsock will just miss out on profitable sales from you but remember Christmas is coming!
Funny you mention weed. As Tubularsock was explaining to Don the bags have a double use advantage.
“I seem to be fixated on being drunk or stoned, don’t I?” Well shit dude, it’s the fucking holidays! What else will get one through this shit?
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Hell Yeah! Why didn’t I think of this! Ripple, here I come!;-)
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Are the bags made of “genuine” burlap? Amerikan burlap? Only “genuine” Amerikan burlap is good enough to hold genuine Amerikan crap-o-la.
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Hemp. Yes, Tubularsock knows that Amerikan Hemp is outlawed. This is Colombian Hemp from, well Colombia. And just when you are up to the TOP of “genuine Amerikan crap-o-la” you just smoke the bag.
Hey, Tubularsock is looking after you!
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I note you don’t have any democracy in your inventory. That product’s just for export, right? Here in New Zealand, they export all our best produce and just leave the dodgy stuff for domestic consumers.
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You are so correct DrB. the Democracy is for export only but unlike so many other competitors Tubularsock throws in three free drones rather than just two.
So that is why NZ produce looks so good. Tubularsock just thought that your farmers had greener thumbs. So much for farmer fantasy.
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I’ll take a ton of RAGE please.
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L/T it’s on it’s way! Thank you so much for the order. Tubularsock still is overstocked in RAGE but Tubularsock is sure that as Christmas approaches it will sell out.
Tubularsock is also discounting his BULL SHIT soon. Many people have said that Tubularsock
seems to have an inordinate amount of it. Wow, the things people say!
Please do remember that the slower your order gets to you the higher the RAGE becomes. Yes, you’ll get your moneys worth!
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Tubularsock, I was going to do all my holiday shopping at your grand palace of free enterprise. But now … after Thursday’s surfeit of family fun, I think I’ll give my relatives IOU’s, if anything, and say the hell with it. But I will order an extra case of rage for myself so I won’t run out before January. I’d wait for the after-xmas markdowns, but you could be out of stock by then — better safe than sedated, this time of year! – Linda
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So Tubularsock has gleaned from your comment, Linda that the family fun-feast turned out as you had predicted. Yet knowing full well the outcome before to traversed the terrane you now wish to withhold festive gifts for them for doing what they do so well.
Tubularsock understands completely from vast experience. And that is why Tubularsock has set aside a small quantity of bags of I HATE YOU MORE THAN I DID LAST YEAR.
This special limited product can be yours and shipped immediately in festive gift wrapped Colombia hemp bags. Just place your order now!
Tubularsock is sorry to inform you but RAGE is currently on back order due to the huge outpouring for that specific product. Your order has been placed and processed but the delay will increase your feeling for the product.
If for some reason you need a rush-of-rage Tubularsock has provided a “hot-line” to call and contact one of Tubularsock’s staff to talk with you by putting you on hold. And repeating via a taped message of poor music and the consent refrain of “Have-a-nice-day”. Thank you.
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Tubularsock, Sigh. I know, I know!! What the hell else did I expect etc. Sometimes things have just got to be, loathe them or not.
Not sure I hate my relatives any MORE than last year but … okay sure, gimme a double order of that special-reserve production! It’s sure to be a top seller this year, guaranteed to fit and never go out of style. Sure to please? Maybe not. Not exactly the point!
Thanks for the heads-up re your customer service crew! I’d expect no less … a subtle reminder of my place in the power structure! And why it’s always a joy doing business with you. – Linda
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Unless of course sedated is what you like. Me, I drink extra coffee and Ahem. Not that ‘sedated’ is a bad thing when needed, and achieved in a good way. Only the numbness of despair is intolerable!
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Tubularsock is not a big fan of “despair”. And before going there Tubularsock would highly recommend more “Ahem” in your coffee!
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Well since the season of giving is upon us I’d like to order an entire truckload of hypocrisy for all of our hardworking elected terrorists in DC … i was seriously thinking of sending the whole truckload to those idiot reptoxicons, but then I realized there really isn’t any difference between the reps and demoduds so I figured I’d do the thoughtful thing and send them both a shitoad … uh, er that’s a TRUCKload, of what embodies both parties!
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You know wolfess, if you are nothing else you are so giving. Tubularsock will ship that HYPOCRISY today!
There will be a bit of delay on the receiving side of the delivery as you may have guessed. That issue is due to inordinate amount of HYPOCRISY at the location already.
But may Tubularsock say, you could not have picked a better gift!
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Luv you tube!!!!! L-)
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Why are you not selling bags of “Fuck You!” I am seriously out of that and I need some like last fucking year, man! Get with it. You’re either in business or you’re not. You’re supposed to keep this capitalism thing going; full steam ahead. No excuses for running out of shit, or “it’s on back order.” If you’re open fer business, ya need to have yer shit together. And now, I’ll have to take my business elsewhere. I thought I could always count on YOU!
Anyone know where I can get a gazillion bags of “Fuck You?” I’m seriously, like, needing em and Mr. Tubularsock here ain’t providing it! Geesh!
But seriously, I love this one! I’ve been on the floor laughing over the comments! However, I do need some serious bags of “Fuck You!” Let me know if you get ’em in! Also, I could sure use some bags of “Fuck you! You lying shit!” Thanks in advance for your help in obtaining the items I need.
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Oh wow, Shelby, I thought we just naturally produced all the fuck-you we might need, as a normal hormonal response to life in this great country. Is there some problem, something not yet known, patented, monopolized, modified and marketed by our corporate benefactors to avert this yawning dearth of fuck-you? This could spell the end of civilization as we know it.
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Well Linda, ‘civilization’ as we know it is ‘fucked’ anyway; at least that’s what I’m seeing. The problem is see, every time I am compelled to say “Fuck you!”, there just ain’t enough “oomph!” behind it; not enough bark to my bite and I just thought that Tubularsock here, could sell me some “Fuck You!” with “OOMPH!” I mean, I’m just not getting it done! My vocal chords have been strained beyond their capacity and they need a little help, hence my plea to Tubularsock to commence with the selling of “Fuck you!” and “Fuck you! You lying shit!”
You know I have my reputation to consider and if it is found that I am sadly lacking in my ability to say “Fuck You!” like I mean it, well then, there goes my stellar reputation for being a hotheaded, ass kicking, “take no prisoners,” vulgar, aggressive, “tough as nails”, virago. And I can’t have that!
This rebel with a cause has just got to have her shit together and I’m just trying to stay on top of my game Linda. And that means that sometimes, I need back up! LOL! Thanks Linda! You’re always looking out for us! And us viragos and rebels surely appreciate it. That’s more than I can say for Tubularsock since his ’empire’, these days, is just not up to snuff!
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Shelby, thank you for sending in your request for FUCK YOU. Tubularsock regrets to inform you that the price has gone way up and this new batch is selling quickly.
However for a much more reasonable price Tubularsock can hook you up with some of the NEW NEVER BEFORE TESTED Monsanto GMO FUCK YOU. Yes, Tubularsock knows that there is always a backlash when a new almost safe product hits the market but Tubularsock has contracted with Monsanto and gotten a deep discount on GMO FUCK YOU.
Of course Tubularsock will be passing this savings on to YOU!
As for your comments attacking Tubularsock’s business model and lack of stocking well, Tubularsock feels that your RAGE about this was a direct result of Tubularsock’s RAGE product and was produced from a “contact-RAGE” from standing near Linda.
That being the case Tubularsock feels that payment is due from you for your “contact-RAGE” to keep you in good standing with TUBULARSOCK EMPORIUM OF GOODS, Ltd.
If you have any questions please contact Tubularsock’s customer service and “Have a Nice Day”.
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LMAO!! Ahem! Uh…Tubularsock, I don’t won’t no GMO “Fuck You!” I’d be dead before I could get “Fuck!” out! What are you trying to do? Kill me! You put a hit out on me? If you have, you’re a ‘dead’ man! Remember, I know Vinnie too. I’m in real good with Linda’s uncle!
And I don’t need no stinking rage! I got plenty! ROTFLMAO!! Peace! LOL!
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Wow! Tubularsock can tell “you got RAGE”! Just shows just how “contact-
highsRAGE works!Man you “politically-correct-people” are all alike. Your kind freak out over a little GMO FUCK YOU. Next you’ll be trying to get Tubularsock to sell only ORGANIC-FUCK-YOU. Are you one of those socialist-hippies?
As for Linda’s Uncle Vinnie we are still close but Tubularsock hasn’t put a contract out on you, YET!
All Tubularsock is attempting to do is get you a reasonable priced product. If you are a little frightened about an kind-of-like-safe product it is not a problem.
Tubularsock will just shift his stock of Monsanto GMO FUCK YOU to Africa and India where Monsanto has been selling all their other GMO products. So a GMO FUCK YOU has already happened in those areas!
And don’t forget, Christmas is coming and TUBULARSOCK EMPORIUM OF GOODS, Ltd. has a huge selection of stocking-stuffers for the entire family. BUY SOME TODAY!
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You’re a mess and I love ya! LOL!
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I just listened to a show about AI – this one is a must hear:http://hwcdn.libsyn.com/p/d/7/b/d7b7517586bc7bdf/MU14.23.mp3?c_id=10423546&expiration=1449247872&hwt=c399ce8182f37387c74f5a803c769150
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Tubularsock has been busy away from the bunker. Yes. Very interesting information L/T thanks for providing the link. Well worth of the time.
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