THINGS WOULD CHANGE!
When Tubularsock wins the election in 2016 and becomes President of the United States —— THINGS WILL CHANGE!
Now it is true that Tubularsock’s Super-PAC doesn’t have much cash because like Donald, Tubularsock funds his own campaign. Tubularsock’s vast sums of wealth have been acquired from speaking at many Wall events. And all Tubularsock Wall events are the biggest and tallest!
Just last week Tubularsock spoke for over three hours to the Sheetrock and Plasterers Meeting in an undisclosed area and the transcripts of that speech will be forthcoming as soon as all the other candidates release their speech transcripts, Hillary.
As usual, Tubularsock took questions and gave answers and all those answers were just GREAT and really FANTASTIC and the answers Tubularsock provided were THE GREATEST AND BIGGEST AND TALLEST answers anyone could have given. EVERYBODY LIKES TUBULARSOCK, TUBULARSOCK GETS ALONG WITH EVERYBODY! And if that isn’t enough Tubularsock can make DEALS! You just can’t do better than Tubularsock!
Tubularsock figures that you may haven’t had the time to noticed the following:
Whether you vote for Donnie, Hillary, or Bernie none of them offer ANY solutions for,
1. the permanent war on terror
2. the neo-liberal economic policies where the rich get richer and you get poorer
(note: that won’t change by breaking up the big banks)
3. the reinstatement of Habeas Corpus
4. an expanded Bill of Rights
5. the US/NATO presence in 130 countries
6. the establishment of complete electronic privacy
7. full governmental transparency
8. a bail out of the $1 trillion student loan debt
(note: that isn’t the same as free college tuition in the future)
And the list could go on …….. aren’t you happy that Tubularsock knows Americans have a short attention span.
AND YES TUBULARSOCK IS THE ONLY CANDIDATE THAT WILL DEAL WITH THIS LIST WITHIN THE FIRST HUNDRED HOURS AFTER TAKING OFFICE ……… COUNT ON IT!
Bernie is the only one who actually has at least some integrity (besides Tubularsock) and does offer at least some hope of real change in the corrupt direction that this country is immersed in at this time and for some time, maybe 200 some years give or take.
Hillary is so corrupt that it will be business as usual.
And Donnie-boy …….. well, he’ll create dysfunction just at a faster rate than Hillary who will speed the decline of the United States into the abyss.
So bottom line for sanity in our time ……. Tubularsock 2016
THE TIME IS NOW MOTHERFUCKERS!
Tubularsock 
I asked Sherrie Cherry, County Clerk of Salt Lake County and responsible for elections in the aforementioned Salt Lake County, if Tubularsock would be on the November ballot and/or if not could I just write in Tubularsock. Long story short, Sherrie Cherry maintains that Tubularsock would have to pay up or perform some rather particular tasks/requests that Sherrie Cherry would put to Tubularsock and THEN, she cackled this rather evil cackle and ended communication.
Dude and you can trust me on this…
DON’T DO IT!!!
LikeLiked by 1 person
NOW THAT’S THE PITS!
Thanks for the warning Don.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Would you like me to go up to Mount Rushmore and get started on your fixture? I’ve done some sculpting in stone before and I think I could do a good job of it.
Leslie
LikeLiked by 5 people
Thank you so much Leslie! Tubularsock is so excited. Do you need an extra chisel? Tubularsock will soon have access to big stacks of debt money drawn from the U.S. Treasury. Get pounding as soon as you can.
LikeLiked by 2 people
Looking forward to it!
Leslie
LikeLiked by 2 people
Leslie, you may have earned yourself the Presidential sweet person award!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Sort out #2 first, Tubular one, and the rest will be easier, would you say?
LikeLiked by 3 people
point well taken Hariod …….. no problem. It’s only money and control.
LikeLiked by 3 people
Tubularsock, Hell yes, the time is now and always for a Tubularsock presidency, if only for a fresh face on Mt. Rushmore (good thinking, Leslie!).
As for Salt Lake … I wonder how much support you’ll have from Mormons anyway? Though maybe I just am not aware of your several wives … I have no need to know!
Anyway thanks for a fine platform summary, it all sounds good, and amazingly sane — which is not what we’re accustomed to, for damn sure. – Linda
LikeLiked by 3 people
Linda, the first task is to get the Mormons drinking. From there it’s revelations!
Having more that ONE wife or husband for that matter must be the definition of hell!
The real problem is after the first 100 hours in office with all of those issues solved what will Tubularsock do? An idle mind is the devil’s plaything. Ok, might be fun.
LikeLiked by 2 people
“Having more that ONE wife or husband for that matter must be the definition of hell!”
The wisdom of the Tube is most righteous and true! Oh Captain, My Captain! (Sorry, I couldn’t make it up on a chair for this, not without breaking my neck and/or ass!)
“The real problem is after the first 100 hours in office with all of those issues solved what will Tubularsock do? An idle mind is the devil’s plaything.”
For one thing, keep me stocked with WT, since on a fixed income, my buzzes are few and far between!
An employed friend (imagine that?) gave me a fifth of Scotch the other day. I have never been a big fan of Scotch. But a buzz is a buzz! And I was drunker yesterday than I have been since college!
Hicup!
LikeLiked by 2 people
Hold that Scotch …….. oh, Tubularsock is too late. Tubularsock is surprised that you have an employed friend. Shit, you must be living with the 1%!
LikeLiked by 2 people
Once you clear out our Augean stables, you might have ‘fun’ staying alive, secret service or no. People take the whole money thing kind of seriously, especially if you threaten their ill-gotten gains. And posing for portraits and statues could fill in a little time for you, I’d imagine. Then there’s the endless re-election campaign to do, too. A tubularsock’s work is never done!
LikeLiked by 2 people
Now Linda, Tubularsock lives a stealth existence. Fuck the Secret Service they usually are the problem! Yeah portraits and statues that could take up some time and you are correct ……
Tubularsock has to start getting his 2020 reelection posters ready ….. I can see clearly now! Isn’t that what 2020 is all about?
LikeLiked by 2 people
Yes, you are so right Tube, more than 1 of those would most likely be unmanageable; hell, there are times when the 1 I do have is un-flokking-manageable! But I ain’t bitter 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
wolfess, Tubularsock is so happy that you ain’t bitter! We must just push ahead and get the job done! Even when the odds seem overwhelming and “un-flokking-manageable”! Drinking helps you know.
LikeLiked by 1 person
heh.. i understand that Tubularsock is nice guy and really want to make things better.
But i think he alone wouldn’t be able to do that even if he will win the elections.
You can call me pessimistic, but first pls consider these arguments:
Well it least we all still can have some fun. 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thought about the subject yesterday and came to the conclusion that even team of reliable fellow folks will not help Tubularsock seriously to change the thins.
Only one workable option exist for change – Tubularsock should not only win the election, but become a wise, but tough Dictator! Circumstances are such one that only patriotic dictator can really change the things.
So i’m for Tubularsock as reasonable wise Dictator of US! )))
LikeLiked by 1 person
Abracadabra, YES! AN ENLIGHTENED DESPOT!
Thanks for your support! You have such great ideas.
LikeLike
Hehe ))) There is no need to be a despot exactly.
But just fair patriotic Dictator. The point is that so-called democracy in circumstances of wild neo-liberal capitalism always turns into plutocracy and power always shifts from the State to Business establisment what is wrong be default. And such plutocracy systems with business(corp) power over the State is VERY self-induced phenomena – you can’t change it from inside whatever you will do. The only way is to capture all the power and start the reformation of the whole system and law environment by using that abs. power you have captured.
Authoritarian regime always gave excellent results in matter of extreem country development, modernisation and industrialisation. Just few examples: Ruined Russia after WWII with Stalin, Communist one party system in China, after-Yeltsin Russia with Putin, Muamar Kadaffi Lybia, Homeni Iran etc..
The core of the concept if that Authoritarian Power should be in hands of patriotic forces – only in such case the country can get all the benefits of Authoritarian regime…and get them pretty fast.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Now Abracadabra, let’s not get carried away here. Tubularsock does want to make things better but the “nice guy” part could be challenged.
Tubularsock does have a lot of tricks up his sleeves and you realize by now that the American public aren’t the brightest crayons in the box.
And far be it for Tubularsock to call YOU pessimistic. Tubularsock will leave that up to your x-girlfriend.
Tubularsock finds you highly optimistic for thinking that Russia, China, and the United States will even BE HERE in fifteen years …… Boom!
Thank you for the link ……. Tubularsock loves “dark” humor. Even when it’s true!
LikeLike
Trying to get elected president by telling the truth? Well, there’s always a first time …
LikeLiked by 2 people
Well SD, Tubularsock would like to think so but unfortunately Tubularsock is a realist and when it comes to political honesty, there isn’t any.
It is difficult when a debate isn’t a debate and your vote doesn’t count so let’s all put our hands on our hearts and pledge allegiance to the illusion that’s America and just accept our predetermined President, Hillary! The corporate-class has spoken ….. it is all about product placement!
Thanks for taking the time to comment.
LikeLike
Sadly your platform’s already more comprehensive than Trump’s.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanks Jay ….. but that isn’t saying much. But Tubularsock will take what he can get! Cheers!
LikeLike