PRESIDENT TWEET!
Tubularsock has waited two days to be sure that ALL the votes had been counted. Tubularsock wants to make it crystal clear that Tubularsock IS NOT responsible for taking votes from Hillary in Tubularsock’s own drive for the Presidency.
It is true that if you add all the votes cast for Tubularsock and divide by three and subtract two you’d see just how close Tubularsock came to winning in the non-swing states and just how close the swing states swung toward a Tubularsock Presidential victory.
Alas, Trump rigged the election and Hillary rigged the election both to keep Tubularsock from becoming the President of the United States!
And as Tubularsock HAS ALWAYS SAID, and you can quote Tubularsock, “Two rigs don’t make a right!”
So now, where do we go from here ……. it is a tough question. But the positive FACT is that when you are at the bottom of the barrel, direct down is a short distance.
What has just happened is that we have just had a REVOLUTION!
Tubularsock is elated that the “establishment-power-brokers” FAILED. And Tubularsock has been SO WRONG that the EPB’s would be able to swing the election for Hillary.
And THAT is after Tubularsock was SO WRONG that the “Republican-power-brokers” would not allow Trump the Republican nomination.
And as Tubularsock HAS ALWAYS SAID, and you can quote Tubularsock, “SO WRONG can be so right if wrong was right. Which has to be explained that a right wrong can’t be wrong when it’s right just like a wrong right can’t be right.”
So now with all that cleared up Tubularsock can wait for the train to wreck when it reaches a full speed crash. Bang-Crash!
Tubularsock is so pleased that the Hillary Machine was defeated and that the Trump Mess is about to ………. just what the fuck will the Trump Mess do.
Well the unfortunate part. Donnie doesn’t have a clue on how to shift any of his changes he called for in the campaign into reality. Talking about making America great when it really never was all that great to begin with and then doing it …….. well that is where the rubber hits the road.
But this is so much better than continuing the same old Shurb-Obomber-Clit going down the same old tracks to the same old conclusions.
This is our very first Tweeter President! Can it get better than that?
And think about this …….. Trump KNOWS NOTHING ABOUT HOW TO DO THIS JOB
and you can’t change the channel because it’s the ONLY GAME SHOW IN TOWN!
The day after the election *** 11/9 *** will go down in the annals of American history as the shocking day that Donnie The Tweeter President shockingly takes hold of the country. It may even be another 9/11 in the making but backwards.
However what if Donnie is the REAL progressive not like Obama who was a progressive in sheep’s clothing with all that false hope and change which proved to be same old same old.
Or Hillary who wasn’t a progressive at all.
What if ……………
But Tubularsock is happy ……. change is possible just in the fact that if the people want something to change they REALLY DO have the voting power.
But we’ll have a long tumultuous downward spiral before that will happen. Hold on to your hat.
So come on America. Join hands:
LET’S MAKE AMERICA FAKE AGAIN!
We live in interesting times.
Leslie
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Part of the reason Leslie is because of YOU and Tubularsock!
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We make quite the team, don’t we?
Leslie
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“LET’S MAKE AMERICA FAKE AGAIN!”
Tubularsock, There it is — the slogan that might have made you our president-elect! Maybe next time? Always assuming there’s anything left in four years. What odds is Vegas giving on that?
Sorry you got robbed! I thought sure Sojourner and I could carry Ohio for you … but Greg Palast says they tampered with the voting equipment here … again … and wouldn’t you think folks would be too smart for that one by now? Anyway, thanks for a great post, and a fabulous campaign. And I’m still available for the Moosejaw appointment, whenever. – Linda
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Yeah, Tubularsock did have a long face for a bit after you and sojourner didn’t pull Ohio and that was even after Tubularsock messed with the voting machines. Damn Palast always sticking his nose in where it doesn’t belong! He wasn’t running for office where’s he think he has some kind of a right to get involved?
But don’t worry Linda the Moosejaw appointment is yours. Tubularsock has talked with both President Tweet and Putin and you are on the list.
Well it’s back to no-title Tubularsock but opportunity knocks as often as it doesn’t.
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On the list? Oh shit, that can’t be good! I’m half-expecting INS to pound on my door as it is … a slight matter of a probably illegal-alien ancestor in the 1790’s … but you know how rigorous the vetting will be for those plum diplomatic assignments, that’s bound to come out if I’m in the running … Might be prudent if I decline the honor this time around — I do need to spend more time with my family, right?
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Linda, Tubularsock does understand your illegal-alien smoking gun situation. We all have a skeleton or two in our closets along with the roll away bed. And President Elect Tweet understands this issue well with Ivana being an undocumented worker. So it may be best not to pursue the Moosejaw appointment at this time. Yes, spending more time with the family and all that ………
But don’t worry the right time always comes in Right Governments and then we’ll seize the opportunity.
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Not that I don’t appreciate your thoughtfulness, I’m most touched and humbly grateful! It’s just the immigration thing has me a little concerned. Though come to that, being deported might not be the worst thing these days.
And now you may have enough time to plan your next run — with 2020 foresight, as always!
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Oh yes. “2020 with 2020 foresight”…….. MAKE AMERICA FAKE AGAIN!
In the United States it is never too early to start the campaign for President!
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Well, I could have pulled Ohio to your side, but the money agreed upon, nor the 12 cases of WT were never received at my warehouse facility, you know, the one where we keep the bodies?
Maybe 2020?
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sojourner, how was Tubularsock supposed to know that the “warehouse” was on large
Michelin tires and was moveable! Tubularsock was busy, busy, busy and didn’t have time to park the limo!
As for the ahhh, you know whats ……. we agreed to not talk of the dead, you know whats! Wikileaks? Remember!
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Oooopsss!!!! Sorry again, mein fuhrer! I meant bodies of evidence! There, does that help?
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And sojourner, nice cover story with that “bodies of evidence” statement. No one will figure out the bones of the matter.
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No bones about it!
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I’m sorry, was I assigned a job I forgot to do? Ooops!’;-)
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SPEECH WRITER!!!!! NOT LIP GIVER. But that is bridge under the water for you climate deniers!
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Speech writer, huh? Well shit! I done fucked up!
And god damn right, a climate denier and proud of it. I know there ain’t no such thing as a climate, and Donald will prove it, too!
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So see the positive sojourner, you and President Elect Tweet have more in common than you thought. Climate deniers are under the weather.
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Hell, I’m in denial about everything, including the fact that I’m not Brad Pitt!
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In the 1973 movie THE CANDIDATE, Bill McKay (Robert Redford), who has been manipulated through a entire senate race by his campaign staff, wins the election. And he asks his campaign manager..”What do I do now ?.” Of course Trump ran his own campaign so he must be asking himself that same question. But even more important, we, the American people, should be asking..”What the Hell do WE do now…?
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Michael, Tubularsock remembers that movie very well. And there is no question that President Elect Tweet has STEPED IN IT with his expensive populists shoes!
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It would appear that not only is Donald not equipped, I believe Donald is stunned and scared to death right now.
I don’t believe Donald was ever supposed to win, he was there to keep Hillary from having to face a legit republican contender. You and I were both right, Tube, but what we didn’t see coming was Hillary’s illness, Wikileaks and the FBI!
It is the repubs who fucked up as well as the dems. And now Donald is stuck being the king. And my guess is, with all the turmoil over his win, Donald is more paranoid now than Step-n-Fetch-it was eight years ago. If I were Donald, I would stay away from windows, and use a double as often as possible.
I can’t stand Donald Trump, and yet, I’m still relieved, to some extent, that Hillary lost. But I am also mad as hell, and I am cussing and bitching on my posts. It’s fun, I don’t think I’ll ever stop!
I know my anger comes as a surprise, but, oh well, adjust!
This fucking hole always sinks lower than my already low expectations for it, so I’m a little shocked that I was confounded when I awoke Wednesday morning.
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True sojourner. The real scary part is the creeps that he’ll depend on for advice. Beating him into shape may be more difficult than they know …….. we shall see.
Tubularsock wasn’t totally shocked on Donald’s win but it did take some time to adjust to the fact that it actually occurred.
But Step-n-Fetch-it has to take much of the credit for President Elect Tweet’s win for his complete failure to galvanize his win on Hope and Change! Rather than going to bat for the people that put him in office from the streets he comfortably fell in line with Wall Street and the Corporatists and left the people to seek someone that would delivery.
Whether that delivery will really materialize Tubularsock doesn’t believe it will but ………
What If?
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Spot on on Obama! He’s a real piece of shit!
Yes, Donnie had some bad taste, but what else can you expect from a business type moron?
Remember, Tube, and you know this, the POTUS is a figure head! Queen Elizabeth wields more power that the POTUS. The POTUS is a puppet gig, so it doesn’t really matter who wins!
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So true sojourner, but can’t we pick somebody that is at least less orange?
Guess not.
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But Sojourner … surely it would indeed matter — if the winner were our own Tubularsock! Of course, now we’ve mentioned … bodies, payoffs, skeletons, and election fraud, his chances may be even slimmer. Then again, seeing what’s happening as we type, hell, who knows, they could actually be better now! It’s a screwy country, in a screwy world.
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Somebody mention SCREWY?
Sounds like a call for TUBULARSOCK!
Look up in the sky,
It’s a bird,
It’s a plane,
NO IT”S SCREWY TUBULARSOCK!
Disguised as a mild mannered blogger
For a great metropolitan blog machine
Fights a NEVER ENDING BATTLE
FOR TRUTH,JUSTICE, AND THE TUBULARSOCK WAY!
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Okay, I need to stop, but I have a quick really stupid question for you and your savvy readers. I’ve always assumed the word “tweet” in current parlance must rhyme with “sweet”. But after this post, I’m now wondering if it might instead rhyme with “shit”. If anyone knows, please enlighten me!
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Linda ….. there are NO stupid questions.
Tweet does rhyme with sweet but does not rhyme with shit.
However if you remain light on your feet as you tweet your tweets
and you don’t have a fit when you tweet your tweets then you won’t be a shit which does rhyme fit which ties into your tweet when writing on the street!
Hope that helps.
Tube
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Abit, I think … or is that a beet? Oh dear. Maybe it’s the crocs keeping me from being light on my feet, even when they fit.
Never mind, I’ve progressed from stupid questions to stupid answers! Time to say good night and good luck!
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Oh no, Tube, you ain’t getting me in one of your never ending poem-snippet routines, I mean my feet ain’t sweet, nor do I tweet or eat meat, but shit does happen!
To coin Brittany, “Ooops, I did it again…!”
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Linda, you mean like, “That’s some sweet shit!”?
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Oooh Sojourner … maybe not, but thanks for an apt oxymoronic image for the looming holiday season …
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Linda, NO PROBLEM! Glad to be of service. Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, etc, etc, etc!
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Let’s see. Trump’s possible staff or cabinet…Giuliani..Gingrich..Christie..Palin..his pit bull campaign manager whose name escapes me…Sessions..and many others. Should they actually be in his administration or a police lineup? I’d opt for the latter.
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yep! Police lineup sounds good to Tubularsock!
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And of course I could not let such a monumental occasion as a Trump victory go by without a poem:
On election night…
We all got a fright…
The Orange man prevailed…
Hilary failed…
The man who filled the media with hate…
Got an electoral mandate…
Or did he?
The electoral College
draws shouts and rants..
Because it was designed when
Men wore knee pants…
This outdated system…
What a bore…
Without it we’d have had..
A President Gore..
And sixteen years later…
We’d have the Hilaryator…
So the Republicans..
The Neanderthals of their time
Will be able to commit..
Their usual crime…
Tax breaks for the rich..
And their president..
Will be the usual…
Son of a bitch…
All Hail to Trump…
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Michael, that covered it! Your political poetry is very good and it is improving. Tubularsock feels that President Elect Tweet will help it along.
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if he doesn’t jail me Tube-along with all the others he’s going to put away. Oh well, I’ve heard prison food has improved. If he jails you too, we can play handball on our rec time.
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You were right about Donnie… Wow!
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