Tube heading slingshot



Screen Shot 2012-07-21 at 11.55.56 PM

  1. 1EarthUnited says:

    Yes, i’m sure it’s the refined, white bread variety… highfalutin gluten, milktoasty old n’ moldy kinda bread. How else u gonna rise to the top? Rumor has it that Tubularsock is bypassing the whole politico process with his insider connections, is that right sir? 😉


    • tubularsock says:

      Well 1Earth it has been rumored in the press that due to Tubularsock’s unique position as Secretary of the Inferior that he has a natural stepping stone for a possible run for the White House. That being said, Tubularsock would like to say this about that: “In this great nation of ours we as Americans have the opportunity to lift ourselves to the pinnacle of greatness with hard work, a belief in an Almighty, and an AK47 under our King-Sized Pillow. Poor people are poor because they don’t think rich and rich people are rich because God and or their families or in Heinz-sight they marry into vast sums of wealth. Whichever the case we are all equal. This is why America is great!”

      Tubularsock is watching closely his explorative-committee for signs of massive donations being made by “the people” or the people’s corporate representatives. Sure, Tubularsock will take a nickel from a third grader who wishes to participate in our fair and equal electoral process or $900,000.00 from a Pac who loves the democratic process. Rest assured Tubularsock is thinking of YOU! And if you are willing to buy a beer for Tubularsock because you feel Tubularsock is the type of regular guy you’d like to drink a beer with, well fucking dial me up. Because Tubularsock will drink with ANY Red-Blooded-American!

      And Tubularsock would like thank 1Earth for his question and say that GMO white Wonder Bread with processed mayo and GMO iceberg lettuce is our American sandwich of choice. God Bless America.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Jeff Nguyen says:

    Tubular don’t need no moldy bread to get ahead. I’m sure you’ve got the goods on someone in high places. Underground bunkers don’t come cheap, after all.

    Liked by 1 person

    • tubularsock says:

      Ahh, Jeff thank you for your comment.

      Underground bunkers never come cheap
      For a few hundred million not even a peep.

      Having the inside intel is where it’s at
      That is the way you can be a fat cat.

      So moving up to the very top positions
      Only takes drive of one’s own volition!

      As Tubularsock say, “See you in the White House.”

      Liked by 1 person

  3. donzo442 says:

    Decisions regarding “who” gets to run for elected office are decided at the country club. By design of course.


  4. “GMO white Wonder Bread with processed mayo and GMO iceberg lettuce is our American sandwich of choice.”

    With thick slabs of baloney, never forget. And a generous blob of velveeta to top things off. Yum!


  5. sojourner says:

    After reading all of the comments here, I have contacted my lawyer and am in the process of suing my university, since the poli-sci course I took never prepared me for what has been revealed in this post. I feel like Paul in Damascus, the scales have fallen from my eyes, and I can see clearly once again. And what I clearly see is a new Merica, with a new leader, TUBULARSOCK!! Let the masses eat cake, or whatever they can find, life is on the side of us rich guys, who take what we want, when we want it! Seize the day and fuck the masses! Right On!

    Hell, let’s skip the presidency and this bullshit political process, we know it’s a joke. And we don’t need no stinking presidency anymore! Let’s just go straight to the title of emperor or even better, Tubularsock, The Oligarch of the Known Universe!! Oh, and just for the record, Tubularsock, my name is not Brutus, nor am I of Italian descent, nor have I ever stabbed a political official (alone or in a group), or anyone else for that matter!

    Liked by 1 person

    • tubularsock says:

      Now THAT is a Biblical Vision if Tubularsock has ever heard one!

      Helping the poor by taking advantage of their ignorance is simply the “right thing to do”, Amen. And rest assured Tubularsock IS the Chosen-One, just ask him!

      sojourner, let us be careful here. We know the political process is bullshit but you must think of others as well. What would we do with all those out-of-work political-science professors without a bullshit system they could teach? They aren’t qualified to flip burgers for Christ sake!

      Show a little compassion!

      And thanks for clearing up your pedigree. Coming from good stock (or being wealthy) is essential in hanging with “The Oligarch of the Known Universe!!” If you know what Tubularsock means. Brutus was such a shit!

      Thank you for your support and remember to get your friends to wrap small bundles of unmarked $100 bills and send them to Tubularsock2016! God Bless Merica.


      • sojourner says:

        “Show a little compassion!”

        Please explain? I must have been absent from the academy the day they taught the word compassion?

        Damn, I didn’t mean to expose my pedigree. I come from GMO laced chicken stock, with a side of botulism!

        I’ll check with my friends on the unmarked bills issue, but they all drive Porsches, so I must make amends!

        Shameless, I know!

        Can I have a cabinet position in the universe, Oligarch, my Oligarch? If so, I prefer walnut!

        Liked by 1 person

      • tubularsock says:

        Of course sojourner, a cabinet for you, some prefer cherry Porsches but you prefer walnut?

        Tubularsock will be happy to fill you in on the “compassion” lesson you missed at the academy. “Compassion” is when you drone a guy that disagrees with you and in the process kill his family and camel as well.

        You see, rather than getting everyone emotionally upset and distraught you eliminate that with a drone strike. That is “compassion”. Are clear now? It is just the way one brings democracy to the uncivilized.

        Thank you for your support. Rose wood is nice.


  6. sojourner says:

    Got it!


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s