Archive for the ‘MONETIZED’ Category

THE PUERTO RICAN SHUFFLE!

Well you can’t beat Trump out Trumping Trump in his goal of being the dumbest retard that has entered into the White House of the United States of America. And Tubularsock isn’t interested in giving those that are dealing with retardation a bad name. And in today’s “correct speak” Tubularsock figures “mentally challenged” has replaced retardation as a more understanding and sensitive term.

EXCEPT NOT when Tubularsock can spot a fucking moronic-retard at thirty paces! And Donald Trump IS AT THE TOP of that definition.

Tubularsock was a bit concerned when the almost catastrophe in Las Vegas didn’t warrant a special golf trophy but after all, it wasn’t a Katrina.

It’s all in who gets killed. But Dumb-Fuck-Lump sent out HIS WARMEST CONDOLENCES to those in Las Vegas which only means a temperature of 30-below. But hey, it’s the best he can do! Explains why Melania won’t hold his hand doesn’t it.

And Congress is sending out their prayers to all of the dead and are getting ready to pass a law to RELAX LAWS ON SILENCERS! And that is because Stephen Paddock, the Las Vegas gunman might have gotten a hearing loss if he hadn’t got himself dead first!

No really, this new law Congress, is wanting to pass, “The Hearing Protection Act”, is to relax laws on silencers so as to protect gun uses from hearing loss. And if Paddock had had the advantage of silencers his success rate at killing would have reach Katrina standards and THAT WOULD CONSTITUTE A CATASTROPHE!

So don’t you worry about any of this! “Sadly, violence will always be part of our lives,” is Sen. Ted Cruz’s take on all this. So Tubularsock has sent Ted an invitation to a Texan Country Western Concert. Tubularsock asked him to wear red.

 

And “People are going to have to take steps in their own lives to take precautions to protect themselves,” the South Dakota Senator John Thune offered up as a solution. Tubularsock invited John and his family to the South Dakota state fair. You know all that wide open space.

 

Oh, and then you have Mitch McConnell from Kentucky who is the Senate Majority Leader with his pearls of wisdom: “I think it’s particularly inappropriate to politicize an event like this, it just happened in the last day-and-a-half. It’s entirely premature to be discussing legislative solutions, if any.” Yep, Tubularsock understands, Mitch, hell the bodies are still warm. Can’t think about machine gun hunting rifles and huge magazines until ahh ……..

So Mitch, agreed to go out hunting with Dick Cheney. Glad that’s settled!

 

And finally, to get real American Main Stream, what is with this hat Melania was wearing when she got off the plane in Puerto Rico?

NO, one has to wonder just how low this country can go. You know like the limbo from Trinidad except in the United States it’s known as the lobotomy and it has worked on the population well enough to elect Orange-Tweet and his plastic family!

 

 

 

 

 

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Capitalism’s Contribution: looting, lying, and acting obscene

© 2017 Dan Stevenson III

the die is cast
the money on the table
some people may die
is it really that bad
just look at the profit
it’s ours ‘cuz we’re able

it’s only good business
it’s just what we do
if they’re in the way
what are we spoze to do
if we don’t take advantage
we’re all going to lose

it’s there for the taking
the law’s on our side
we made it that way
the game being played
it’s really their fault
if they don’t step aside

sure we’ll help their children
we’ll put them in camps
we’ll do what we can
you must understand
it’s best that you see
we have a smart stance

we’ve done this forever
our heritage, you know
it’s way too important
to just let it go
so call in security
to protect what is so

it is our right
our history complete
we don’t mind doing
what has to be done
until the next time
with a butt of a gun

the damage we do
to land, water, and air
is not of concern or
cause for despair
we donate most heavily
for orphan repair

the profit which is
the ultimate treasure
can be used to buy
all in good measure
the next exploitation
to protect this great nation

sure some have to die
for others to live
but really we’ve found
it’s just like it is
not one thing to worry
or even forgive

so stack up that money
and oxygen tanks
so we can survive
as others all die
‘cause we got the talent
when the earth’s out of balance

yet some keep on yelling
it’s too late to correct
but what do they know
with no portfolio
our investment appreciates
the longer we go

it’s called progress you sillies
you don’t even know that
if you don’t risk
you’re just scaredy-cats
so count yourselves in
all the way to the end

so come on no worries
for what we do know
is dow jones is up
we’ve got money to burn
at least just enough
to cover the earth’s very last turn!

 

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