Archive for the ‘Radiation’ Category

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From a series of informed sources who are not authorized to speak on this issue but have nothing else to do today in the bloated government bureaucracy has presented an outline of the influence of the new Secretary Of The Inferior on the Obama Administration.*

The Tubularsock News Team has also sent our stealth photographer into the mix and has documented photographic evidence of all the rumor and innuendo.

As we like to say at the Tubularsock News Team break-room, “If a picture is worth a thousand words then this story is worth ten thousand words!”

Rather than be accused of conflict of interest we have turned our investigative journalism over to the tabloid, The New York Toast.

NY Toast Cover

From the very beginning fear in the Administration was palpable. Could a “commoner” be able to bond with the elite?

Well, our inside sources all concurred that the new Secretary Of The Inferior fit like a hand in a glove.

Lunch

The new Secretary Of The Inferior was asked by the press how he felt to be at the left hand of The President of the United States and he clearly stated, “no, the steak tartare please”.

The more comfortable the Secretary Of The Inferior became the more cautious distrust  appeared within the West Wing. In fact, down right suspiciousness of his intentions were felt and cloaked in plutocratic innuendo.

This type of approach to an obvious “outsider” was lost on the Secretary who felt that they liked him. But he started to isolate himself in the President’s office.

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That suspicious attitude became more prevalent within the President himself.

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However the Secretary Of The Inferior and Michelle became more ……..

Say ………… ahh, shall we say “friendly”?

Not being sure of the Secretary Of The Inferior’s intentions Obama started to take him with him whenever he traveled.

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Plane Wave

And then one day the President and the Secretary Of The Inferior were scheduled to fly to the Asian Conference in Kuala Lumpur.

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Stolen

Obama left

Now in any Presidential Administration lots of stuff gets stolen. Paper clips, ball point pens, computers, ground-keeper tools, ballistic missiles, large sums of cash, larger sums of cash, cash of larger sums than that and one’s integrity.

The biggest surprise is that anyone noticed.

Immediately Congress formed two committees, one in the House and one in the Senate. Each committee member and staff took it upon themselves to fly to Kuala Lumpur to see where Air Force One should have landed if it hadn’t been stolen.

It was verified that there was NO, they repeated NO, Air Force One on any golf course in Kuala Lumpur.

Senator John McCain was unable to say, “The terrorist have been part of this Obama Administration for some time and the Ukrainian people need all ….. no, I mean Palestine has to be considered ….. no, I mean  …”

The CIA, NSA, DIA, NGA, NRO, AFISRA, MI, MCIA, ONI, OICI, I&A, CGI, FB/NSB, DEA/ONSI, INR, and the TFI were all called into service but many of them were out of the office so a message was left with their respective receptionists. **

All of these agencies work separately and together to conduct intelligence activities and are under the I.C. which is headed by the DNI, who reports to the President.**

The FBI, DOS, DSS, IRS-CID, TIGTA, USMP, DOD, DCIS, CID, OSI, NCIS, DOJ, ATF, USDI, USDA, DOC, HHS, DHS, USCG, FPS, CGPD, CBP, ICE, USSS, SPS,USCP, USPIS were also all put on the case. **

It appears that the USPIS (United States Postal Inspection Service) may have not been necessary however Senator Diane Feinstein insisted that it was not because her husband was well invested in post offices that the agency must play a role. It was because of “. . . her keen concern to protect every woman and child of this great land”.

As Senator Feinstein did not say, “That plane could have been easily packed up in a pre-postage-paid-priority-mail-express-package and shipped to the Russians for all we know!”

As a result over seventeen million dollars will be allocated to throughly inspect ALL the P.O.Boxes in every post office within the United States.

Representative Robert Fuckoff (R) Ohio demanded that for national security concerns he would pursue drafting a bill to create an inspection team to investigate all “general delivery” windows of every post office in the United States.

During an impromptu stop over at the employee’s break room at Postal Inspection, Inc. Rep. Fuckoff stated, “This twenty-seven million dollar allocation bill will ensure that inspections would be conducted on all “general delivery” locations. What better way is there to protect our citizens from terrorists who want to harm our home-land?” 

When the maimed-stream media asked about the rumor that his family was involved in Postal Inspection, Inc. Representative Fuckoff stated, “Those accusations have been made before!” 

……………………………………………

A Special Blue Ribbon Committee was appointed immediately if not sooner by the President to “investigate the disappearance of Air Force One and The Secretary Of The Inferior” and to report back to him. The President insisted that the Committee’s work would be totally transparent and would be held in secret for national security reasons.

The maimed-stream media didn’t pursue the definition of transparent assuming the President is a Constitutional Scholar and knew the definition better than they.

Congress announced that it will immediately take up the issue of funding the Special Blue Ribbon Committee as soon as they return from their inter-session break and before their fall break. This leaves “. . . a corridor of six full hours” stated Senator DipStick (D) from Louisiana. 

Conspiracy

First there were the sightings.

DairyQueed gang

(UPI) “They were ALL there”, said Jimmy Insano from DelRio, Texas. “Right out in front of the Dairy Queen! Elvis, bin Laden, Kennedy and the Secretary Of The Inferior!

“I didn’t see no plane or anything like that …… but I didn’t go in the Dairy Queen. Sure, it could have been in there.”

 The heat in DelRio at times reaches 135 degrees in the shade.

(The Sun, UK) “The chances of Air Force One being snatched from the sky by an alien space craft isn’t as far fetched as it may appear” says Jay Jay Johnson. “There have been sightings recently as far away as Denver”, he continued. “Space IS the final frontier, you know, and if and I’m saying IF, The Secretary Of The Inferior had been sent with a message to give to extraterrestrials, then why not?” Jay Jay Johnson concluded.

(New York Times) It was reported today that the Malaysian Government was asked by President Obama to assist in the tracking of the missing Air Force One. Critics say this new development has created perhaps a “hint” that the President isn’t sincere about finding the Secretary Of The Inferior.

President Obama’s new Press Secretary Josh Earnest, stated at todays news briefing that “. . . he was earnest that the President was earnest about the search for Air Force One as well as The Secretary Of The Inferior”.

This confused the White House Press Corp because they thought the President was not Earnest because Josh Earnest was Earnest. And Josh Earnest stated that he was earnest and the President was earnest as well. The White House Press Corp reiterated that Earnest was Earnest and Earnest was not Obama.

After forty-five minutes the Earnest – earnest conundrum was tabled until a later date.

(FOX News) Donald Rumsfeld was asked to comment on the incident and stated: “we know, there are known knowns; there are things that we know that we know. We also know there are known unknowns; that is to say we know there are some things we do not know. But there are also unknown unknowns, the ones we don’t know we don’t know.”

And he continued, “The missing Secretary Of The Inferior is the ultimate in unknown unknowns, if you ask me.”

And of course, Dick Cheney was asked for comments on this new international mystery but was unable to make it to the interview because he had “left his heart in San Francisco” and hadn’t noticed until his flight was over Wisconsin. Which at that point had to turn his flight back to the West Coast.

 

 

 

Mystery

 

 

 

footnotes:

* To catch up with The Secretary Of The Inferior refer back to: blog post, NEW EMPLOYMENT, NEW ECONOMY.

** Those are all investigating agencies of the United States Government. Tubularsock doesn’t have time to make that much shit up!

All photographs may look like they have been altered in some way. They have NOT! However they are a different angle from the original photo.

Photography is in the eye of the beholder.

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SAFE AS SAFE CAN BE

This is rich! Shanghai, China had another huge pollution problem a week or so ago. Yeah, the “air” was so thick with shit that visibility was only about a 150 feet. That is some thick pollutant in the air. So what did the Chinese government do?

  1. Stop all coal burning and moved to solar energy?
  2. Stop all driving of autos and trucks and go back to the bicycle?
  3. Evacuate all the residence of the city and move them to safety?

Nope.

They changed the pollution standards so the new pollution level was considered SAFE for human consumption.

Of course you know what Tubularsock said about the Chinese government don’t you?

你他妈的螺母?*

But don’t worry. When the radiation levels in the areas outside the “stay-here-and-fry-zone” of Fukushima became dangerous what do you think the Japanese Government did for their people?

  1. Immediately decommissioned all nuclear plants and shifted their power source to wind?
  2. Evacuated all the residence of Japan and move them to a safe haven like Shanghai?
  3. Got plastered on sake?

Nope.

They  just changed the levels of dangerous levels of radiation to a higher level and declared it safe.

Of course you know what Tubularsock said about the Japanese government don’t you?

クソのナットとは **

Not to worry, not to worry. When after 911 New York City was one huge cloud of asbestos and concrete dust the EPA declared that the air was safe to breathe.

OR after BP filled the Gulf of Mexico with oil and then to hide it dumped hundreds of thousands of gallons of Corexit into the water the American Government said that the water was safe to swim in and the air in the area was just fine.

OR after the Fukushima Nuclear Meltdown the radiation detection monitors on the West Coast of the U.S. were reading inordinately high so the U.S. Government turned them off and stopped monitoring for radiation. Declaring that every thing was safe.

Of course you know what Tubularsock said about the American Government don’t you?

Are you fucking nuts?***

Now you may have noticed a pattern here. Yes?

Well each government body does this in order to keep “progress” alive in their economy even though the people might be dead.

So, rest assured ……..

“PROGRESS IS OUR MOST IMPORTANT PRODUCT”.

—————————————

*Are you fucking nuts?

** Are you fucking nuts?

*** Are you fucking nuts?

 

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FUKUSHIMA SAKI

Posted: October 11, 2013 in Japan, Radiation
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Tubularsock went out for Sashimi last night at a favorite Japanese restaurant. And what is Sashimi good for without Saki or maybe I should rephrase this.

Tubularsock went out for Saki last night and some Sashimi happened to fall on a plate with a big glob of wasabi, a pile of fresh ginger and radish shavings.

Now you know that a large hot saki is a nice treat so after the meal I ordered a small hot saki for desert. All in all …….. someone else was driving.

But the thought did cross my saki-mind (kind of like “monkey-mind” but way mellower) that raw fish may not be all that raw any more. The amount of radioactive water leaking into the Pacific Ocean from the Fukushima Nuclear Plant (60 billion becquerels per day which translates to 21.9 trillion bq per year) is now rather out of control. Don’t be alarmed but it was stated by Robert Jacobs, a nuclear technology historian, in an RT (Russia Today) interview that, “There is no reason to believe that radiation leaks at Fukushima will be contained by 2020, so the Tokyo Olympics can become impossible.”

Now doesn’t that blow your mind.

Now the great news is that Fukushima radiation levels are 18 times higher than previously thought and that was determined back in August, 2011 so Japan’s nuclear watchdog agency raised the severity of the leak from “level 1” which is considered an “anomaly” to a “level 3” which is a “series incident”. This is all based on an eight-point scale used by the International Atomic Energy Agency for radiological releases.

Fukushima has been out of control from day one and it took until August of this year (2013) for Tokyo Electric Power Company (TEPCO) to ask for international help!

Scared yet?

You see, all that stuff they taught you in grammar school science class does have some helpful information. Like the currents in the oceans MOVE AROUND in a regular pattern and the water off the coast of Fukushima will move along and end up passing the West Coast of North America.

And the fish swim around in certain migration patterns so even if you catch a tuna off the coast of Alaska by golly it’s the same tuna that was feeding off the coast of Fukushima.

Of course the fish are tested for safety by the EPA. Well, no the EPA doesn’t test fish.

Oh. So the NOAA (The National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration) test for fish safety, well, not really but they do tract the debris that is still showing up occasionally on the West Coast from Japan. Well then the FDA. Yes, the FDA does test for radiation but not often and the last time they did the tests on tuna which do migrate from Japan to the fishing waters of the West Coast showed NO “detectable levels of radionuclides so far”.

But the testing is random and there is an agreement between the U.S. and Japan that keeps the FDA from extensive testing. Feel safe?

Another important factor is that right after the Fukushima Radiation Crisis happened the EPA  pulled 8 of its 18 radiation monitors in California, Oregon and Washington because  they were giving readings which SEEMED too high. 

There is a world wide nuclear disaster and the reading SEEMED to high! Yes you read that correctly. And we pay them for this?

And during a world wide nuclear disaster the EPA (for your safety) increased

the allowable “safe” exposure levels for radiation:

A nearly 1000-fold increase for exposure to strontium-90;

A 3000 to 100,000-fold hike for exposure to iodine-131; and

An almost 25,000 rise for exposure to radioactive nickel-63.

Now how thoughtful IS THAT! 

The EPA’s new radiation guidelines also allow long-term cleanup thresholds thousands of times more lax than anything EPA has ever judged safe in the past.

You see the EPA just didn’t want you to worry so in a nuclear disaster they just stopped their radiation monitors and increased your exposure rate to a higher “safe” level and it’s ALL GOOD!

Wow, that was easy.

Fun side note: In case you don’t recall, it was the EPA that told New Yorker’s (after 911) that their air was safe to breath after all that asbestos laden concrete dust particles hung in the air. And to this day large numbers of people have respiratory problems. 

You can now see just how the EPA works out those little pesky health issues.

Fun side note: Speaking of government investigations remember when NIST (National Institute of Standards and Technology) did their investigation of the World Trade Towers after 911? Remember when they were asked if explosive were used to bring down those towers? Remember their answer was NO! Remember they then were asked if they had tested for explosives? And their answer was NO! 

Wow, that was easy.

Remember when independent researches discovered “military-grade nano thermite (an explosive compound) in the dust of the World Trade Towers and asked NIST to investigate that. Remember NIST answer was NO.

Wow, that was easy.

So the great thing is that our government is consistent. Feel better?

Now if you reflect back to your grammar school science class again another bit of useful information is that the Earth also has AIR CURRENTS. You’d almost start thinking that the Earth is all one place and that just because we drew lines on maps and called each place a different name that maybe, just maybe, we are somehow interconnected. 

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Anyway the wind currents from Japan go toward North America and published in the International Journal of Health Services, was a scientific study that looked at both infant and adult death rates during the time when Fukushima occurred, as well as in previous months and years within the United States.

During the 14 weeks prior to Fukushima, for instance, infant deaths had been declining by 8.37 percent, while in the weeks following the disaster they increased by 1.8 percent. Among adults, a 4.46 percent death rate was observed in the weeks after Fukushima, compared to 2.34 percent, which is about half that rate, a year prior.

Now there was a lot of controversy over this study and the opinions broke down on pro-Nuclear and anti-Nuclear lines. But the wind currents do travel from Japan to North America and there were tested documented studies that showed the increase in radiation in MILK, RAINWATER, and the general FOOD SUPPLY in the United States after the disaster and there was no debating that!

As Haruki Murakami, the renowned and Tubularsock’s favorite Japanese novelist stated, “This time no one dropped a bomb on us . . . We set the stage, we committed the crime with our own hands, we are destroying our own lands, and we are destroying our own lives.”

But it is way bigger than that. The Chernobyl death toll was 985,000 people mostly from cancer and that “accident” was contained.  In April, 2012 the Japanese government officially announced that the severity of the Fukushima Daiichi nuclear disaster had reached level 7 and yet news media in the U.S. and Europe still don’t report what is happening and what the potential risks are and that the fact that it is OUT OF CONTROL! “While the spread of radiation to the West Coast of North America was casually acknowledged, the early press re-ports (AP and Reuters) ‘quoting diplomatic sources’ stated that only ‘tiny amounts of radioactive particles have arrived in California but do not pose a threat to human health.’”*

*In real terms this is “A Nuclear War without a War: The Unspoken Crisis of Worldwide Nuclear Radiation”! (Michel Chossudovsky (Editor), www.gobalresearch.ca

But Tubularsock is not concerned! I just bought two bottles of saki for tonight. Forget the Sashimi!

Kanpai!

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