Archive for the ‘CYBER-ATTACKS’ Category

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OBAMA EMAIL HACKED!

Tubularsock was hacking into the NSA cafeteria menu today and causing dietary heartburn. It was a small cyber hack but just enough not to be noticed.

Tubularsock has an entire sector in his underground bunker overlooking Washington, D.C. from Oakland, CA that deals with hack, hack, hacking!

Now, Tubularsock has even developed how to pass the blame off onto the Russians or the Chinese or even the North Koreans. Really it’s easy.

Now, it’s best not to take credit for a hack because the U.S. has a new law that allows the U.S. military to bomb you if you are found to have disrupted our precious motherland, ahh, fatherland or is that homeland? Tubularsock just can’t keep those Nazi word speak statements straight.

Anyway Obama signed an executive order to protect us from the evil that is sneaking into every computer on every lap in every cafe in the United States of America! Thank be it to GOD, or is it Goggle or maybe Mac. Ok, something where an Apple’s involved!

Anyway thank’s to them.

You remember back when the 2015 State of the Union Address was delivered Step-An-Fetch-It said that Congress must do something about Cyber Crime. Well way back on February 12, 2013 Step-An-Fetch-It had issued Executive Order #13636 which had set the Cyber ball rolling.

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The first thing it did was to “. . . protect the country’s critical infrastructure” from cyber attack. You know the infrastructure that is falling apart because all our money is going off to fight the two dozen wars we are involved in. That infrastructure!

Then it was to “. . .engage with international partners to promote internet freedom . . .” and allow through that internet the ability for NSA and the U.S. military hacker units to read all the other leaders private emails and communications. Because of the freedom loving nature of the United States.

And building on that by “. . . shaping a cyber-savvy workforce and moving beyond passwords in partnership with the private sector.” So as to further dissolve protection of your privacy and civil liberties.

All in all the Step-An-Fetch-It Administration provided these principles in its approach to strengthen cybersecurity:

“Whole-of-government approach

Network defense first

Protection of privacy and civil liberties

Public-private collaboration

International cooperation and engagement.”

But even with all of this hyperbole the North Koreans hacked into Sony and fucked around because of that Comedy Movie Sony produced about the assassination of the great leader. Or at least they said it was the North Koreans.

And now, this week Step-an-Fetch-It’s emails have been hacked by the RUSSIANS!

Well, there is no proof provided that the Russians did it but Step-An-Fetch-It is still pushing the propaganda about the evil Russians ……. Tubularsock wonders if the general American even gives a rats ass any more.

Now this has all occurred even after the Cyber Threat Intelligence Integration Center (CTIIC) was created by Executive Order on February 25, 2015.

You see CTIIC was created for the purpose of “connecting the dots” regarding malicious foreign cyber threats to the nation and cyber incidents affecting U.S. national interests.

It’s the old connect the dots game. Well, Tubularsock figures they didn’t.

But the President said that the “New Tools” we have put in place “. . . will be used to go after the worst of the worst of malicious cyber actors. It just might be more honest, in Tubularsock’s mind, to go after ……. The United States Government! And cyber crimes are not the only crimes the .S. Government has committed!

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PLOTTING THE PLOT

A long time ago on a dark, cold, windy night someone told Tubularsock that there were only seven basic plots in literature. Now Tubularsock has never cared to find out if that is true or not but Tubularsock does know one thing. When it comes to the CIA, Mossad, M15, and DCRI there is only ONE PLOT and it is the one they are cooking up!

Which leads us to the current plot. The one that has caused the world to focus.  But hey, it’s a secret plot so like any basic magic trick …… the hand is quicker than the eye.

And the “ayes” have it but they are wrong! Always watch the hands.

So what is this Charlie Hebdo shoot out at the “OK” corral REALLY all about.

Ok. Lets start with an odd (or not) happening. On Thursday, January 8th The second-largest French public TV channel reported that:

The police commissioner, Helric Fredou , 45, who had been investigating the January 7th Charlie Hebdo attack was found DEAD in his office at about 1 a.m.

Oh well, you know …… standard operating procedure for the French police.

He reportedly met earlier with the family of a victim of the Charlie Hebdo attack and died before completing a report that he had been compiling.

Well you know the press ……. blood and guts sell, right!

Now remember this was reported by the SECOND-LARGEST French public TV channel on the 8th.

But it wasn’t until January 12 that the British press picked up the story. But that’s understandable because they are across the Channel.

And coming last place ………. January 13 ……….. the U.S. press. Well, the Atlantic!

Now that is just part of FREEDOM OF THE PRESS. They can report breaking stories whenever the fuck they please. And just maybe the six corporations that own the free press may not be interested in any details of the Charlie Hebdo attack.

You know, the parade’s over …….. let’s move on to college football. That’s what the public really is interested in, right?

Now Commissioner Fredou, it was reported, had been suffering from depression and experienced burn-out. He used his own gun and committed suicide. And that all may be true, Tubularsock sure doesn’t know Commissioner Fredou personal problems. But Tubularsock does know the ambulance chasing press and when they do something out of character ….. Even the Tabloids, well THAT’S news.

Why no coverage?

Oh sure Tubularsock has a theory ……… removing the focus on this entire event is where it’s at now because if one starts to pay real attention to it, well there are some holes in the story. In fact, the more you look the more like French-Swiss cheese it appears. Now that’s a delicacy!

You know, one could ask …….. who really did this Charlie Hebdo event which is being compared to 9/11. And that is a great comparison because who did 9/11 still hasn’t been determined. In fact, slowly much truth that the government’s narrative of that tragic event is just wrong continues to flow into public view. Yet the game continues.

Oh ……… don’t look, nothing to see here. Keep moving…..

So let Tubularsock define the players for you because it appears, right on schedule, they are attempting to move the goal post.

“IN THE BEGINNING ………..” there were terrorists 2 by 2 or was it 1 by 3. No, 1 by 1. Oh fuck it …….. forget in the beginning!

“IN THE SECOND COMING …….” there was Anwar al-Awlaki and he was droned to death by the Obomber Team in 2011. In September of all months of 2000 … 11. You have got to thank the Washington, D.C. PR firm for being symbolically creative for that kill date.

Anwar al-Awlaki

But how time changes. Back in 2001 Awlaki was the imam (worship leader) of the mosque in Falls Church, Virginia. And at that time he was considered a “moderate-Moslem” you know the kind. The ones in todays world Congress votes to fund with arms to fight in Syria as Western mercenaries and attempt to other-throw the Assad government.

Now Anwar al-Awlaki was an American citizen born in New Mexico and had all what American citizens have …….. a RIGHT to a fair trial for crimes and misdemeanors.

No more. The President can kill anyone he wants. And yes he has the power to do so and there are “legal reasons” he has that power BUT YOU CAN”T SEE THEM because they are secret. And for you to see the rationale for those powers would risk national security. The Supreme Court says so!

Back in 2001 Awlaki was the go-to guy in Washington, D.C. as a media source to answer questions about Islam and the 9/11 attacks. The New York Times  and National Geographic both interviewed him.

He even was invited into the Pentagon to a luncheon in the Secretary’s Office of General Counsel because the Secretary of the Army asked for a presentation from a moderate Muslim as part of an “outreach effort” to ease tensions with Muslim-Americans.

Now this may seem odd but remember white people are not really in tune with those brown Middle Eastern types so we want to “outreach”. It falls into that same shit about “what do black people want” syndrome. So, of course ……. we out-reach!

Hey, it’s the best the main stream whites can do. Because they don’t want to live next door to them!

But one could ask what has Awlaki got to do with the Charlie Hebdo business? Awlaki is DEAD.

Well come to find out back in 2010, Anwar al-Awlaki issued death threats to cartoonists, journalists, and writers from Britain, Sweden, Denmark and the United States for slandering the Prophet Mohammed by drawing cartoons of him and “who are going out of their way to offend Muslims worldwide” as he expressed in Inspire an al-Qaeda magazine.

You see Awlaki “turned radical” around 2006. You know those fucking moderates. You just can’t depend on them. And he went into hiding.

While he was imam at the masque in Falls Church he preached to 3000 members and three of them were 911 hijackers who were al-Qaeda members. “He even spoke with them!” (OMG) Hmmm, 2,997 …… 3.(Do you think a Catholic priest could have criminals attending his mass occasionally?)  The FBI even met with him to discuss his relationship with them.

And if that isn’t enough Awlaki in 2001, presided at the funeral of the mother of Nidal Malik Hasan the Army psychiatrist who later e-mailed him extensively in 2008–09 before the Fort Hood shootings. (must be a link …. he presided at Hasan’s mother’s funeral)!

Hey, Awlaki even associated with Umar Farouk Abdulmutallab. Come on you remember. The Nigerian Christmas Day bomber, the underwear bomber! In fact, Awlaki was ALLEGEDLY involved in planning the attack.

You remember. Abdulmutallab was escorted onto the plane in Amsterdam by a man “of authority” without a passport, visa, or luggage. Gosh no red flag there. And he attempted to detonated his ass-bomb near landing time on board Northwest Airlines Flight 253, en route to Detroit, Michigan. This occurred when Israeli intelligence was in charge of the Amsterdam airport security.

And gosh, you do remember Abdulmutallab’s father even informed the U.S. embassy that his son had “been radicalized” before the event.

Funny thing, Awlaki wasn’t in control of the Amsterdam airport or the American Embassy.  And Awlaki is conveniently DEAD but still lives as you will see!

But finally the tie in ………… Said Kouachi, one of the brothers responsible for the Charlie Hedbo attack, according to The Associated Press, had lived with Abdulmutallab, the underwear bomber.

And Abdulmutallab had been, in fact working under cover for Saudi intelligence and the CIA when he was given a new non­metallic type bomb aimed at getting past airport security. That was according to what US and Yemeni officials had told The Associated Press in May 2012.

So.

Now we have Chérif Kouachi and Said Kouachi as the weapons of choice to attack Charlie Hebdo. And we have Amedy Coulibaly the terrorist who was involved in killing an unarmed woman police officer and he was the hostage-taker and gunman in the kosher market where four of the hostages were killed.

Kouachi Bros

But during the market crisis the hostages said that Coulibaly yelled out:

“We are just telling you we are the defenders of the prophet and that I Chérif Kouachi have been sent by Al Qaida of Yemen and that I went over there and that Anwar Al- Awaki financed me.”

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The three men were all members of the same Paris jihadist cell.

Now is that a bit odd to you? Notice the quote doesn’t say “I” (Coulibaly) but “I” (Chérif Kouachi) and proceeds to tie in Al Qaida and Anwar Al-Awaki.

And then think about the Kouachi brothers conveniently leaving their ID in the getaway car.

Well Dr. Watson it appears someone is trying to tell us something. And rather emphatically.

But it is useful to know that Chérif Kouachi, Said Kouachi and Amedy Coulibaly had been tracked and monitored because they were involved is terrorist activities. They were arrested many times, yet were allowed to continue training and plotting with fellow Al-Qaeda in Iraq, Yemen, and Syria groups.

Then about 6 months ago, French intelligence decided the suspects’ serial offenses along with their direct contact with Al Qaeda – including the receiving of terrorist training and battlefield experience fighting along side them in Syria – were “low risk” cases and therefore not worthy of their attention.

And if you are interested, six months, coincidentally, is about the typical length of time that security and intelligence “sting operations” take to set up and target terrorists operations. This time frame provides an appropriate time within which an event like these attacks could have been planned, funded, and eventually carried out.

It does follow a trusted pattern. A blatantly obvious terror cell, known to authorities, “drops out of sight”, and then set loose at an appropriate moment. And then executed making sure that the “terrorists” are executed as well. Mission accomplished.

This pretty much has all the telltale signs of a guided military-intelligence operation.

And the “hit-date” was pre-planned because Coulbaly drove his wife, Hayat Boumeddiene, to Madrid, Spain and stayed with her until January 2nd when he returned to France and she flew on to Istanbul, Turkey stayed for four days then moved to Akçakale,Turkey and then crossed into Syria on January 8th the day of the attack. Her movements were watched by MIT (Turkey’s intelligence agency) using cellphone tracking.

Well what does all this mean? Why was this attack carried out? Who wins?

Tubularsock figures first, who needs to be scared into line? AND WHY?

The short list for the possible rationale for this attack is as follows:

1. The U.S. government executed the attack to punish France for its independent foreign policy, citing its vote at the United Nations to recognize Palestine as a state.

2.Both France and Germany are baulking over the economic hit they are taking over the Russian sanctions. And talking about ending them. This attack could have been done to refocus their commitment to the American cause.

3.NATO needs public support of its ISIS war and it’s Syrian destruction. The attack could help to enrage the publics of Europe into a stronger fear based hatred of Moslems.

4.France is being targeted by Israel since its lower house last month voted to recognize Palestine, which allowed the occupied state to become part of the International Criminal Court, with the power to hold the Zionist state responsible for genocide. An enraged Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu warned that it would be a “grave mistake” if the French parliament recognized Palestinian statehood.

5.The President of Turkey has suggested French security forces are to blame for the deadly terrorist attacks in Paris, since the culprits had recently served prison sentences.

Doesn’t their intelligence organization track those who leave prison?

“French citizens carry out such a massacre, and Muslims pay the price,” President Erdogan said.

In any chess match you may have to sacrifice a few pawns in order to check-mate the King. Pawns are expendable to a point.

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Zbigniew Brzezinski, in his 1998 book The Grand Chessboard states that, “Without sustained and directed American involvement, before long the forces of global disorder could come to dominate the world scene. And the possibility of such a fragmentation is inherent in the geopolitical tensions not only of today’s Eurasia but of the world more generally  . . . that puts a premium on maneuver and manipulation in order to prevent the emergence of a hostile coalition that could eventually seek to challenge America’s primacy.”

Whatever the case whenever these types of terrorist activities take place it is safe to say that somewhere in the line of command you’ll find the CIA and Mossad …… hey, that’s what they do.

Remember, it was the CIA  that  assisted in creating al-Qaeda.

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Knightscope bots

 

 

Tubularsock was sitting reading the German press and ran across this story. The interesting thing is that Tubularsock’s top floor corner office overlooking Washington D.C. from Oakland, CA is a stones throw from Mountain View as the crow flies.

And it took the Germans to fill Tubularsock in on a local story.

A few side notes. Mountain View is a traffic infested dumpy little town south of San Francisco and for the life of Tubularsock where a view of a “mountain” comes into the picture is beyond me!

Yes, the coast range moves along the coast but “mountain” is an exaggeration to say the least.

That being said Knightscope has in reality created seven K5 robots and four of them have already been ordered for use at a technology company.

A K5 is about as tall as a person and is designed to “act friendly and threatening at the same time”. Kind of like your mother-in-law on Thanksgiving!

These little guys are packed with cameras, microphones, weather sensors, navigation equipment and electric motors which allows a K5 to slide on rollers across the floor or parking lot and evaluate it’s surroundings and they are programmed to detect “abnormal behavior”, sure …….. No, these aren’t the droids you’re looking for …..

According to the U.S. Census there are about a million people that work in sentry type jobs in security companies. K5 can do this type of work for less than half the cost of a living person. Their battery lasts for 24 hours and is programed to go to the charging station when low. Recharge time takes 15 minutes. Hey! Every worker needs a break!

And that is exactly why Tubularsock came up with the idea of unionizing them. That, and the fact that a K5 isn’t armed yet. So to organize them is still safe for Tubularsock. But of course drones weren’t armed when they started out either ……… the possibilities are unlimited!

Just a matter of time …….. and as long as the Grand Jury is filled with BOTS there won’t be any indictment against a K5 either!

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Now here is something that you won’t believe. Tubularsock has discovered an operative TIME MACHINE. Hey really, it is up and running and YOU haven’t even noticed!

It’s amazing at several levels. First, it’s right in front of you. Second, you don’t have to climb into it. Third, it is operating as Tubularsock writes this information to you.

Fasten your seat belt, expect tubebulence!

It appears to Tubularsock that this new 21st century TIME MACHINE was plugged in a long time ago maybe all the way back to Babbling-Alzheimer-Ridden Reagan but no matter, it is manifesting NOW so that is where we are in TIME MACHINE present moment time!

The United States has become a combination of (perhaps due to cross wiring within the TIME MACHINE)  the end of the Roman Empire combined with the ultimate Fascist State. ( jump back, fucking Hitler!)

The government and the corporation are one and the same, hence: Fascism!

Now, Tubularsock knew there’d be doubters.

Fucking look at the facts …………. everything the United States Government does is TO PROTECT NATIONAL INTERESTS.

Now the American public THINKS that THAT is them but it is not! PROTECT NATIONAL INTERESTS is capitalistic profit and control speak for their profit and their control! That is the reality, period!

The United States Empire Direction is crumbling and this was foretold by putting a BLACK Man in the WHITE House. See the color contrasting problem?

The White Power Structure needed a scapegoat so what better scapegoat than a Black Man. Especially a Black Man who only looks FORWARD! (He’d fucking freak out if that fucker looked back!)

And just like the Roman Empire we have troops and mercenaries throughout the world destabilizing areas so to conquer them as servant-states. (in the old days they were called colonies but we’re past that, we’re modern!)

ALSO our economy and monetary policies are crumbling because we have sunk to a belief that denial is the operative solution.

It is all falling apart as it did for the Romans. Wow, time flies …………

At the same time as the Roman Empire is crumbling (476 C.E.) and the Fascist State is solidifying (1930’s AD) we have a Caliphate forming before our very eyes. We are talking about the 600 BC here!

Wow! This TIME MACHINE is awesome!

No really, tell Tubularsock ……… how often have you seen the fall of the Roman Empire, the rise of the Fascist State and the formation of a Caliphate ALL AT THE SAME TIME?

Which only goes to prove that TIME IS AN ILLUSION.

But this is the 21st Century for Christ sake! Top this:

Add to all of this THE COLD WAR!

Yes, Ladies and Gentlemen, THE COLD WAR too!

You get the fall of the Roman Empire …..

You get the rise of the Fascist State …..

You get the formation of a Caliphate …..

AND THE COLD WAR TOO!

ALL FOR ONE LOW PRICE!

A box set just in time for the holiday season!

And if you act now Tubularsock will toss in ***** AT NO EXTRA CHARGE*****

Joe Biden’s new hit single: “FOLLOW YOU TO THE GATES OF HELL”

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SO ACT NOW  ******* ONLY $19.95

CALL NOW 1 800 BUY-TUBE

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Ok, Tubularsock got a little carried away here. Shows you what happens when the dream of short term profit overcomes long term thinking.

In such a short time period the U.S. came from “saving the world” from the clutches of evil Fascism and destroying Communism to being the ultimate Fascist-Police-State and attempting to bomb-drone-and-torture the world into lockstep-order TO PROTECT OUR NATIONAL INTERESTS.

Well it’s not working. Self interest will win the day and it may be a surprise but other countries in the world have their own self interests too.

It will be fun to see Germany, Russia, and China form an economic bloc. The old day fascists and commies finding their home grown roots against the present day U.S. fascist-police state.

What will the TIME MACHINE  show us next? Just maybe Tubularsock will have figured out the dials and buttons in the TIME MACHINE  by then. Ahh, what adventures await.

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From a series of informed sources who are not authorized to speak on this issue but have nothing else to do today in the bloated government bureaucracy has presented an outline of the influence of the new Secretary Of The Inferior on the Obama Administration.*

The Tubularsock News Team has also sent our stealth photographer into the mix and has documented photographic evidence of all the rumor and innuendo.

As we like to say at the Tubularsock News Team break-room, “If a picture is worth a thousand words then this story is worth ten thousand words!”

Rather than be accused of conflict of interest we have turned our investigative journalism over to the tabloid, The New York Toast.

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From the very beginning fear in the Administration was palpable. Could a “commoner” be able to bond with the elite?

Well, our inside sources all concurred that the new Secretary Of The Inferior fit like a hand in a glove.

Lunch

The new Secretary Of The Inferior was asked by the press how he felt to be at the left hand of The President of the United States and he clearly stated, “no, the steak tartare please”.

The more comfortable the Secretary Of The Inferior became the more cautious distrust  appeared within the West Wing. In fact, down right suspiciousness of his intentions were felt and cloaked in plutocratic innuendo.

This type of approach to an obvious “outsider” was lost on the Secretary who felt that they liked him. But he started to isolate himself in the President’s office.

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That suspicious attitude became more prevalent within the President himself.

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However the Secretary Of The Inferior and Michelle became more ……..

Say ………… ahh, shall we say “friendly”?

Not being sure of the Secretary Of The Inferior’s intentions Obama started to take him with him whenever he traveled.

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Plane Wave

And then one day the President and the Secretary Of The Inferior were scheduled to fly to the Asian Conference in Kuala Lumpur.

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Stolen

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Now in any Presidential Administration lots of stuff gets stolen. Paper clips, ball point pens, computers, ground-keeper tools, ballistic missiles, large sums of cash, larger sums of cash, cash of larger sums than that and one’s integrity.

The biggest surprise is that anyone noticed.

Immediately Congress formed two committees, one in the House and one in the Senate. Each committee member and staff took it upon themselves to fly to Kuala Lumpur to see where Air Force One should have landed if it hadn’t been stolen.

It was verified that there was NO, they repeated NO, Air Force One on any golf course in Kuala Lumpur.

Senator John McCain was unable to say, “The terrorist have been part of this Obama Administration for some time and the Ukrainian people need all ….. no, I mean Palestine has to be considered ….. no, I mean  …”

The CIA, NSA, DIA, NGA, NRO, AFISRA, MI, MCIA, ONI, OICI, I&A, CGI, FB/NSB, DEA/ONSI, INR, and the TFI were all called into service but many of them were out of the office so a message was left with their respective receptionists. **

All of these agencies work separately and together to conduct intelligence activities and are under the I.C. which is headed by the DNI, who reports to the President.**

The FBI, DOS, DSS, IRS-CID, TIGTA, USMP, DOD, DCIS, CID, OSI, NCIS, DOJ, ATF, USDI, USDA, DOC, HHS, DHS, USCG, FPS, CGPD, CBP, ICE, USSS, SPS,USCP, USPIS were also all put on the case. **

It appears that the USPIS (United States Postal Inspection Service) may have not been necessary however Senator Diane Feinstein insisted that it was not because her husband was well invested in post offices that the agency must play a role. It was because of “. . . her keen concern to protect every woman and child of this great land”.

As Senator Feinstein did not say, “That plane could have been easily packed up in a pre-postage-paid-priority-mail-express-package and shipped to the Russians for all we know!”

As a result over seventeen million dollars will be allocated to throughly inspect ALL the P.O.Boxes in every post office within the United States.

Representative Robert Fuckoff (R) Ohio demanded that for national security concerns he would pursue drafting a bill to create an inspection team to investigate all “general delivery” windows of every post office in the United States.

During an impromptu stop over at the employee’s break room at Postal Inspection, Inc. Rep. Fuckoff stated, “This twenty-seven million dollar allocation bill will ensure that inspections would be conducted on all “general delivery” locations. What better way is there to protect our citizens from terrorists who want to harm our home-land?” 

When the maimed-stream media asked about the rumor that his family was involved in Postal Inspection, Inc. Representative Fuckoff stated, “Those accusations have been made before!” 

……………………………………………

A Special Blue Ribbon Committee was appointed immediately if not sooner by the President to “investigate the disappearance of Air Force One and The Secretary Of The Inferior” and to report back to him. The President insisted that the Committee’s work would be totally transparent and would be held in secret for national security reasons.

The maimed-stream media didn’t pursue the definition of transparent assuming the President is a Constitutional Scholar and knew the definition better than they.

Congress announced that it will immediately take up the issue of funding the Special Blue Ribbon Committee as soon as they return from their inter-session break and before their fall break. This leaves “. . . a corridor of six full hours” stated Senator DipStick (D) from Louisiana. 

Conspiracy

First there were the sightings.

DairyQueed gang

(UPI) “They were ALL there”, said Jimmy Insano from DelRio, Texas. “Right out in front of the Dairy Queen! Elvis, bin Laden, Kennedy and the Secretary Of The Inferior!

“I didn’t see no plane or anything like that …… but I didn’t go in the Dairy Queen. Sure, it could have been in there.”

 The heat in DelRio at times reaches 135 degrees in the shade.

(The Sun, UK) “The chances of Air Force One being snatched from the sky by an alien space craft isn’t as far fetched as it may appear” says Jay Jay Johnson. “There have been sightings recently as far away as Denver”, he continued. “Space IS the final frontier, you know, and if and I’m saying IF, The Secretary Of The Inferior had been sent with a message to give to extraterrestrials, then why not?” Jay Jay Johnson concluded.

(New York Times) It was reported today that the Malaysian Government was asked by President Obama to assist in the tracking of the missing Air Force One. Critics say this new development has created perhaps a “hint” that the President isn’t sincere about finding the Secretary Of The Inferior.

President Obama’s new Press Secretary Josh Earnest, stated at todays news briefing that “. . . he was earnest that the President was earnest about the search for Air Force One as well as The Secretary Of The Inferior”.

This confused the White House Press Corp because they thought the President was not Earnest because Josh Earnest was Earnest. And Josh Earnest stated that he was earnest and the President was earnest as well. The White House Press Corp reiterated that Earnest was Earnest and Earnest was not Obama.

After forty-five minutes the Earnest – earnest conundrum was tabled until a later date.

(FOX News) Donald Rumsfeld was asked to comment on the incident and stated: “we know, there are known knowns; there are things that we know that we know. We also know there are known unknowns; that is to say we know there are some things we do not know. But there are also unknown unknowns, the ones we don’t know we don’t know.”

And he continued, “The missing Secretary Of The Inferior is the ultimate in unknown unknowns, if you ask me.”

And of course, Dick Cheney was asked for comments on this new international mystery but was unable to make it to the interview because he had “left his heart in San Francisco” and hadn’t noticed until his flight was over Wisconsin. Which at that point had to turn his flight back to the West Coast.

 

 

 

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footnotes:

* To catch up with The Secretary Of The Inferior refer back to: blog post, NEW EMPLOYMENT, NEW ECONOMY.

** Those are all investigating agencies of the United States Government. Tubularsock doesn’t have time to make that much shit up!

All photographs may look like they have been altered in some way. They have NOT! However they are a different angle from the original photo.

Photography is in the eye of the beholder.

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