Archive for the ‘Pat Robertson 700 Club’ Category

Tube lighting

 

RELIGIOUS FORNICATION AND BEYOND

Now today Tubularsock was in the process of cleaning his underground solar panels that provide off-grid power to Tubularsock’s top floor corner office of his underground bunker that overlooks Washington, D.C. from Oakland, CA when Tubularsock started to think about sex.

Now it is almost a proven fact that when you are in the process of cleaning, your mind wonders off to thoughts of sex. No really, it’s kind of scientific.

And maybe just the monotony of cleaning reminds one of the monotony of the “missionary-position” of sexual intercourse. No really, it’s kind of scientific.

Now if Tubularsock just thought of the hedonist’s position toward sexual intercourse, a voluptuary thought indeed, then that could be satisfactory. But no, Tubularsock’s thoughts penetrate to a deeper level. That of the role that religion plays within the sexual formula. No really, it’s kind of scientific.

Now, I know many of you are going to say, “There goes Tubularsock and his prurient interests again”. But no, Tubularsock is ONLY doing this for YOUR prurient interests because if you have not stopped reading this yet then you are wondering, where in the fuck is Tubularsock going with this? And really, Tubularsock knows that you too are interested in Tubularsock’s almost scientific pontifications.

Well sex and religion go together as well as gonorrhea and syphilis so to speak.

Religions have always been interested in sex ….. in THOUGHT and in DEED. No stone is left unturned here.

Every religious organization (Church, Synagogue, Temple, Mosque) have lessons in sex usually for those who are getting married. And sometimes instruction in celibacy for teen groups.

So because the fundamentalist religions are so voicetress about their views on sexural behavior in our society, Tubularsock will start with them.

The fundamentalist religions don’t want ANY fun in sex. Sex is a duty to produce more fundamentalists for the “flock” so that it increases. Much like chickens but not because according to the fundamentalist religions having sex with chickens is “a sin”!

ABORTION  is “a sin” and against the WHITE MALE GOD LAW as well. But killing a child with a drone is fine because of “GOD’S WILL”.

And killing an entire village is a   “A JUST WAR”.

Having sex before marriage is “a sin” according to the WHITE MALE GOD and so is teaching young adults “how babies are created” because it may stimulate an interest in sex.

Showing how to prevent pregnancy is NOT ACCEPTABLE because it may increase sexual activities among young unmarried adults who are without knowledge or foresight statistically having unprotected sex like rabbits which is “a sin” as is having sex with rabbits!

Do you see a pattern here?

Yet, the brain dead which make up the bulk of the fundamentalist religions say way more bull shit than any truth but they just keep repeating this shit which actually should be “a sin” but isn’t!

And to top this all off there are some who feel that demonic spirits can be transferred to you during sex and/or sexual activity. And to others, like Tubularsock, who thinks that that must be some great sex!

dot space

And then there are the Catholics.

Now the Catholics too want to be in control of the sexual activities of their followers and just about everything about sex is “a sin” including thinking about it!

The amazing thing here is that the teaching and direction of proper sexual behavior is directed by Priests or Nuns who have vowed NEVER to have sex and even worse never have had it!

Sex outside of marriage is “a sin” and can get you excommunicated but like many “sins” there are ways around that. Usually by money and prayer.

Once again the only sex that is considered acceptable is that which increases the “flock” and the more the merrier.

And the use of condoms are prohibited and is “a sin” because it prevents pregnancy which is the ONLY reason for sex and the logic goes that using a condom creates the possibility of sex for fun and pleasure ……. and we can’t have THAT!

tube get real

And once again ABORTION  is “a sin” and against the WHITE MALE GOD LAW. But killing a child with a drone is fine because of “GOD’S WILL”.

And killing an entire village is a “A JUST WAR”.

But the cool thing is Papal infallibility and that’s a neat little package that says when it comes to Church dogma the Pope in virtue of his supreme apostolic authority, (which is another way to say he was voted into Popehood) defines the doctrine concerning faith or morals to be held by the whole Church. Much like the buck starts here. And the Pope hasn’t had sex at all (in theory) so there you have it!

                                                           dot space

The Mormons almost take the cake when it comes to religion but only because it’s a “modern” day religion formulated by Joseph Smith in the 1830’s. A little late compared to other religions.

Some believe that Mormonism is a cult but Tubularsock still hasn’t figured out where a religion and a cult part company. Oh well.

Mormonism is just an upgrade religion using the same basic Christian stories but those stories were formed from the Book of Mormon which Joe said he transcribed from “. . . a buried book made of golden plates”. The angel Moroni revealed their location to Joe and he dug them up and worked out the translation.

Be that as it may, it is clear that when it came to sex it was only good for creating more offspring for the flock like the aforementioned religions but with a twist. In order to do that task multiply wives were needed so early Mormons believed in the sanctity of polygamy.

Sex out of marriage is not permitted which may have accounted for the most common name for patrons of motel sex being Mr. & Mrs. Smith. A fact, Tubularsock will leave to your imagination.

But true to form with the rest of the Christian Religions Mormonism believes that ABORTION  is “a sin” and against the WHITE MALE GOD LAW. But killing a child with a drone is fine because of “GOD’S WILL”.

And killing an entire village is a “A JUST WAR”.

                                                                 

                                                                  dot space

Now Protestantism in general is any of those European religions that broke away from the Catholic Church back in the day. And the Protestants disagree among themselves over all the silly little rules they each came up with but they all agree that sex is “a sin” unless in marriage and ABORTION  is “a sin” and against the WHITE MALE GOD LAW. But killing a child with a drone is fine because of “GOD’S WILL”.

And killing an entire village is a “A JUST WAR”.

dot space

Now Tubularsock doesn’t really care what one believes. And Tubularsock doesn’t even mind religious minded people spinning their belief mantras and through example showing others why one should join their “flock”. That is all well and good.

What Tubularsock sees as an abomination is ANY group attempting to DICTATE how things should be and attempting to force it on to everybody else.

Believe what you will, practice it but DON’T force it onto others!

Now how fucking simple is that?

The force is you, use it wisely.

sigtube

Advertisements

tubeheadingBomb:copyright

“it is indisputable that the United States engaged in the practice of torture”AND THE HIGHEST OFFICIALS OF THE UNITED STATES WERE RESPONSIBLE FOR IT!

The Constitution Project which is a legal research and advocacy group released their 11-member bipartisan panel’s 577 page report about the actions of the Bush Administration’s torture program.

Now if you want all the details go to http://detaineetaskforce.org and you’ll blow your mind. Like it’s not new information, it has just cleared out the bull shit!

Tubularsock is not going to outline for you what you should read for yourself. You remember when Obummer took office he wanted to “look forward” rather than do anything about the illegal war crimes of George, Dick, Condi, Paul, and Donnie to name a few. By doing this Obummer himself committed a war crime. (remember …….. torturing is an established war crime)

You see, no matter how much John Yoo and Jay Bybee twisted the legal reasoning in order to deliver  the “OK” for torture, it just doesn’t hold up to legal standards either with domestic law or international law ………. PERIOD!

Now don’t get mislead here. Under international treaties and Constitutional law they all agree that TORTURE IS ILLEGAL!

The fact that you call it by another name say, “enhanced interrogation techniques” does not change the fact that it is torture!

rats copy

That is the way it should be. There was a time in the United States of America where we stood for something. Americans believed that torture was immoral and was not to be tolerated on our watch.

Well, how old fashionably quaint. We are the modern America and torture is IN and acceptable by the majority of the American public. SO BE IT!

But really, Americans don’t want to look hypocritical so here is Tubularsock’s plan to bring the world along with the New-American-Order program ………. Torture-The-American-Way.

1. The United States apologies to Japan for putting to death those Japanese that were convicted of conducting torture during WW2 and pay reparations to their families for their loss. We admit that they were correct and we were wrong!

2. The United States apologies to Germany for the Nuremberg Trial holding Hitler’s underlings accountable for the torture and killing of 6 million+ Jews, Gipsies, and Gays. After all, it was only collateral damage. And the German SS were just following orders just like the U.S. military at Abu Ghraib, Bagram Air Base and Guantanamo. We admit that Hitler and his boys were justified in their actions and thank them for showing us the way. 

3. The Unites States apologies to Vietnam for portraying bamboo shoved under fingernails as something that was bad to do. The CIA and military admit that the Vietcong were correct in showing us the way. In fact the U.S. military are such strong believers in the Vietcong approach that they set up an entire “School” of The Americas (aka Western Hemisphere Institute for Security Cooperation) to teach Latin American dictators how to torture.

4. And there is always Korea but why go on. Let’s, as a people, just admit that we were collectively WRONG, say we’re sorry and as Obummer so correctively said, “Let’s look forward, not backward”.

                                                                     NOW DON’T YOU JUST FEEL BETTER?  

                                                

                                                               

rats copy

No, we as a nation care little for human rights or even human dignity. Maybe that is why we as a nation have the largest prison population of non-violent drug crimes in the world.

But in truth, the largest population in the U.S. are the people on the “legal” drugs the pharmaceutical industry dispenses to doctors to keep the population asleep.

Ahh ……… perchance to dream,

THE AMERICAN DREAM.

Screen Shot 2012-07-21 at 11.55.56 PM

Now Tubularsock is happy! The election is over and now the “people” can go back to sleep. In fact for Obama-people, he really doesn’t need you anymore. After 2008 he dropped his base because he didn’t need them. And some of them still came out to help him not to need them again. Does stupidity grow on trees?

But hey, great news. No really ………. Tubularsock is being optimistic here ……….

Let’s move forward!

It is comforting to know that the Tuesday morning kill meetings will still be ongoing without interruption. Donuts anyone?

And from those meetings the continuation of drones killing women and children without interruption will still be ongoing.

Thank god Wall Street will continue to gamble without restrictions.

And Health Care will still be controlled by the Insurance Industry.

The Pharmaceutical Industry will still be able to charge unlimited amounts of money without restrictions.

And BP will receive new off shore drilling leases.

And transparency will remain opaque.

Continued war without end.

The continuation of that Drug War.

And they will still be saving us all from marijuana.

Boy, this FORWARD thinking is so refreshing. Kind of keeps one riveted with joy.

And gosh, with those kind of policies in place Tubularsock is just overwhelmed with expectation for the future. Isn’t looking forward fun.

And with that ol’ step-an-fetch-it-style that O-bomb-ah has exhibited Tubularsock recommends you keep your eye on Social Security because the Black Wonder is going to gut it within the next four years. Don’t think so? COUNT ON IT FOLKS.

Now I know you think you voted and your vote counted this time. No! You still don’t get what is happening?

Obama is President only because the “owners” want to eliminate Social Security. 

Just like a Democrat couldn’t become “friends” with China as Nixon did because it would look like they were being “soft” on communism a Republican couldn’t dismantle Social Security for fear of a violent backlash from the citizens.

So. Enter Obama. 

So many of your think the “good-guy” won. You will see that as the tooth fairy isn’t real nor is THIS “good-guy”.

 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Now don’t think that Tubularsock wanted Romney for a second. Tubularsock has exactly the same feeling about Romney as former Gov. Jessie Ventura. And that is, “I don’t want a President that wears “magic underwear!”

But Tubularsock’s real concern is what is televangelist Pat Robertson going to do now. For years The Christian Broadcasting Network and Pat’s 700 Club has stated that Mormonism is a CULT.

Then Pat endorsed Mitt and a “miracle” happened. No seriously, a MIRACLE”!

Overnight the CBN and the 700 Club web site was scrubbed of any mention of Mormonism being a CULT!

But now, when they continue to prepare the world for the “Second Coming” will Mormons get to go too?

One thing for sure ……….. O-bomb-ah will not be going! According to Pat, Obama may be a MUSLIM or rather “. . . was trained in a madrassa, one of those Muslim schools, but nevertheless that is his inclination”.

Like Tubularsock always says in these situations ………… PRAISE BE TO ALLAH!

But Robertson earlier this year revealed that, “I think He (God) showed me the next president, but I’m not supposed to talk about that. So I’ll leave you in the dark — probably just as well — I think I’ll know who it will be.”

AND THE ENVELOPE PLEASE ………….. Oh shit! It’s a MUSLIM INCLINATION!

Screen Shot 2012-07-21 at 11.55.56 PM