Archive for the ‘CHRISTMAS’ Category

CHRISTMAS VACATION IMPEACHMENT

Now, now just calm yourselves down.

With the entire fabricated framework of DEMOCRACY in the balance due to a totally corrupt and morally deficient President who is about to be tried in an Impeachment Trial by the United States Senate …….. also known as the upper legislative body ………

The Government is ON CHRISTMAS VACATION!

Yep, nothing spells IMPENDING CRISIS like vacation.

That is why when the Japanese bombed Pearl Harbor they picked a Sunday!

Because, at least then, American’s were “closed”. Sitting around watching baseball and eating apple pie!

And heaven knows with the grueling work load that our dedicated Congressional members have to do and with their meager salaries it is understandable. Vacation!

At a paltry pay rate of $1017.54 to $1041.91 PER WORK DAY our Congressional Members with 171 to 194 days off a year that $174,000.00 a year sure doesn’t go as far as it used to!

Tubularsock knows you feel for them. You know, they have to take the legislation that is written by the corporate lobbyist and fax it to the bill printing office and then place it into the flow of other corporate bills being “legislated” and voted on.

Talking about stress. That is why they have their own swimming pools and and private gyms and lunch rooms within the Capitol building complex!

And because of this constant flow of corporate generated bills our Congressional members don’t even have time to read what they are voting on. But the ayes have it!

Especially if its for building guns and bombs but not so much for health, schools, libraries, infrastructure …… you know, “Just Where Can We Get The Money?”

And all that is necessary to vote is pressing a button. Too busy to write.

And OH YES, OrangeTweet is on vacation as well and it only is costing the tax paying citizens about $104,000,000.00 to date for just his gulf trips!

And the fact that much of that expenditure if paid to Dump’s family businesses is a questionable procedure for any government official to be involved in.

The bottom line ……… is that WE are paying for all of this and ALL OF THIS are off on vacation.

Somehow the gravity of this historical Impeachment event seems to have been lost in the mist of the

HO, HO, HO’S.

But rest assured, they ALL line up at the feeding trough to pick up their “employment” checks …… right on time! (no vacation there)

 

 

MERRY METAPHOR HOHOHO! 2019 A TUBULARSOCK CHRISTMAS.

Well it is all winding down now.
People with no money have indebted themselves until next October to spread happiness under a dead or plastic “tree”.

All because “THEY” told you that plastic crap makes one happy!

And “THEY” repeated it to you over and over and over.

And how can your children COMPETE with your neighbor’s children and school mates without an iPhone-10,000?

Yeah, we go through this every year and with the same results nationally.
Higher suicide rates.
Higher alcohol consumption.
Higher drug intake.
And record high depression!

There is something wrong with this picture.
Don’t you think?

Happiness doesn’t lie in having “things”!
And it isn’t improved by having even more because it isn’t the answer to start with.

LESS IS MORE.

Ponder that on Christmas Day over the din.

And just what is Christmas without Tubularsock’s favorite Christmas Carol?
Oh sure …….. sing along!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FOg7aPNLLG0

 

 

TUBULARSOCK’S CHRISTMAS WISH!

 

Well it has become extremely difficult to deny that we are living in a complete loony-tune world and the escape hatch has been closed for repairs.

There is an attempt to dump Frumpy-Orange-Dumpy off the wall and all the kings horses and all the kings men won’t be able to put him back together again.

Doesn’t Tubularsock only wish.

No, the Orange-Turd has nine lives and his true followers lap up Orange-Turd’s shit faster than a bag full of Mac-nuggets.

And the Corp-Democraps have done everything they can to keep the same stagnated Biden-Clinton-Obummer clap trap and not even dress it up.

The CorpDems don’t want ANY change to the system in truth. They benefit with Dump in office personally and their income and investment portfolios prove it.

The CorpDems if elected may benefit more if they take control however either way they’ll benefit personally. So FUCK YOU America!

And don’t you worry, either party believes in and supports endless wars because THAT is where the money happens to be.

Helping the poor, helping the sick, helping education, providing education for the incarcerated, investing in infrastructure …….. COST TOO MUCH!

Killing people indiscriminately in other countries WE CAN AFFORD.

That is where the money is made.

And the CorpDems and the Repulicant’s will keep that going and pocket the money.

That is why ANY candidate that is NOT WITH THEM is against THE AMERICAN WAY.

And what is the AMERICAN WAY ——- KILLING!

Don’t think so ………….. take a real look at American History.

Now there is one way to really help shift this inevitable negative direction.

Tubularsock would take Baby-Bush and Obomber and arrest both of them for WAR CRIMES and put them on trial …….. NOW!

You see, if the stand-ins of the powerful keep dodging responsibility for their actions we’ll just keep getting the same corporate puppets.

And you know that is not going to happen so just sit back and say a little prayer for an atomic bomb test going awry and hitting Washington, D.C. while Dump, VP-Dense, and a full session of Congress are in session.

Tubularsock knows it is just too much to ask for BUT Christmas IS coming after-all!

 

SARAH’S SAD STORY HITS HARD

 

Tubularsock realizes that there is a wealth of sad stories out there in the big wide wonderful world and this is only one of them but ……. and Tubularsock warns you,
this will bring tears to your eyes and so close to Christmas too!

Sarah Huckabee Sanders is packing her Adidas Santiago Mini Duffel Bag with all her honest news notes she has given out to the press during her time as OrangeDick’s press secretary.

In addition it has taken nine semi trucks with extended trailers to carry away her lying news notes defending the OrangeButterBall.

She is still collecting her near $180,000 salary until she parts, heading out and off of the White House lawn.

 

Sarah Huckabee Sanders, the daughter of former Governor of Arkansas Mike Huckabee, a Southern Baptist minister, learned so well about lying, “much like Christ did in the Bible from her Bible thumping father.

And about “pussy grabbing” as perhaps God dabbled in on the side.

And maybe even thoughts of incest with Ivanka.

Are those “sins” supported by Preacher Huckabee as a “good-loving” Southern Baptist?

Hell, it’s just the way they are! Amen.

The three guiding principles of the Hucksters are lying, grabbing, Incest or THE THREE I’S AS SOUTHERN BAPTIST CALL THEM!

Tubularsock just can’t wait until Sarah’s children become teenagers.

Sarah’s “lying at any cost” activities that she executed so well will crop right up when her kids become teenagers and at that time will bite her on her huge derriere.

Couldn’t happen to a nicer person.

 

ATTENTION:

A PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT

 

 

 

 

 

TRUMP & SANTA 2018

HALT, the bull shit train!

Every year for decades now NORAD, the North American Aerospace Defense Command, has followed Santa Claus on Christmas Eve as he zips around the world dropping down chimneys delivering presents to GOOD little girls and boys.

Sure he does.

NORAD’s aerospace control includes ensuring air sovereignty and air defense of the airspace of Canada and the United States and is on duty 24/7 three hundred and sixty five days a year EXCEPT September 11, 2001. But hey, who’s counting?

Children are encouraged to call NORAD for information of the location of Santa Claus at any given moment to be told if he’s on track.

And some years some children’s calls are diverted so they also can speak to the President or the First Lady as a political PR stunt.

Michelle Obama answered children’s calls for several years while being First Lady.

And so it goes ………. Melania performed her PR duty just like Michelle and all was well in Christmas land.

And then President Orange-Scrooge took some calls this year as well.

But first he had to close down the government …… HO, HO, HO!

You know, President Orange-Scrooge doesn’t seem to do ANYTHING correctly. Do you know what Tubularsock means?

No?

 

Well let Tubularsock give you this example:

President Orange-Scrooge took a call from a 7 year old child and during the course of the conversation the question of Believing In Santa Claus came up. The child’s response was “yes sir” indicating a belief in the jolly old Claus, when President Orange-Scrooge proceeded with “. . . at 7, it’s marginal, right?”

Now the child didn’t know what marginal meant or what the reference meant so all was good in Christmas land.

But REALLY, a guy who lies ALL THE TIME chooses at that moment to start to “tell the truth” about the existence of Santa Claus …….. REALLY?

Yet there is a much larger point Tubularsock wants you to consider.

And that is the Santa Claus LIE. That should give you pause.

Your parents LIE to you that Santa Claus is REAL!

You can call up your government on a special phone line and be told Santa Claus is REAL!

And think on this ………. THE GOVERNMENT tracks Santa just like they track YOU and that is REAL.

And the President and First Lady tells you Santa Claus is REAL!

AND YOU BELIEVE …………..

So when the times comes when you are told by your parents, your government, and your President and First Lady that Santa Claus is “AN ENEMMY COMBATANT” or an ISIS infiltrator or terrorist sympathizer will you believe THAT as well?

Sure you will!

That is how we got into the Vietnam War, and Afghanistan, Iraq, Syria, and Yemen!
And the citizen’s believed ……….. and that same Santa Lie continues today.

So it would do us all good if President Orange-Scrooge received a huge chunk of “clean-coal” in his Christmas stocking this year.

Maybe he will, if Santa Mueller has anything to say about it!

But unfortunately, OrangeTweet isn’t the only Santa liar out there!

 

NEWS BEFORE IT HAPPENS!

“Well-placed” sources close to the Secretary of State have stated that Tubularsock, 
The Secretary of the Deplorables, has an uncanny ability to “fit-in” well with North Koreans due to his kimchi knowledge.

Tubularsock speaks Kimchi fluently as well as several other Vegan Languages.

Some have insinuated that the Secretary may be working “undercover” for the CIA after Tubularsock was overheard saying that “. . . the U.S. should cover-over the undercover and close the drawer on the issue at hand.”

 

This comment was verified by an official who spoke on condition of anonymity due to the laws in place about discussing sensitive diplomatic issues.

The comment occurred between Tubularsock and a room service maid at the TRUMP PYONGYANG HOTEL, according to a senior White House official involved in the preparations.

IN FURTHER NEWS:

Christmas is upon us and a miracle has occurred. The Big Bang Theory has been proven correct as demonstrated by the following cosmic insight by none other than TUBULARSOCK!

 

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ARE THEY DONE YET?

Posted: December 25, 2015 in CHRISTMAS
Tags:

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Tube done yet?

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HO! HO! HO! JOLLY TUBE

Posted: December 22, 2015 in CHRISTMAS, Climate
Tags: ,

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This is the time of year that Tubularsock hides in his top floor corner office in the underground bunker overlooking Washington, D.C. from Oakland, CA.

Not from fear but from dread ……..

Tubularsock always puts on his stealth attire when he has to leave the bunker and you wouldn’t recognize Tubularsock on the street because the S.F. Bay Area that Oakland is a part has so many diverse hair styles Tubularsock isn’t all that noticeable. No, really.

But just in case Tubularsock always wears a ski hat with blinking green lights with its top cut open and people don’t even look up as Tubularsock passes on his two-wheeled bike. It’s rather a live-and-let-live community in general.

And hell with the homeless black dude that rides his bike pulling two bike trailers with a boom-box and two huge 12” woofer speakers blaring and adding that to all his belongings with everything painted GOLD to match his gold painted top hat, suit coat, pants and high top tennis shoes ……..

Well shit, Tubularsock even begins to look normal!

Tubularsock seldom goes into retail stores. Just have no interest and most of the stuff is priced so high that Tubularsock figures the “liberal-press” has buried the true story that the Chinese slave laborers in the sweat-factories have been given a huge wage increase! Fucking workers!

At least here in America when we asked the Black Africans to leave their homes and come to America we put them to work 24/7. They were good workers too. In fact, so good that the powers to be set up a system that still exist today. And keeps those Black Workers behind bars working in order to keep them from having to associate with all those welfare cheats!

Seriously! If you recall, those Native Americans would run off when our early Christian farmers used to attempt to “train” those savages to work. And none of them spoke American! Go figure.

But that was then and we are here now and things have improved.

And today in America we even love Mexicans! No seriously!

Right after Donald Trump proclaimed to build a wall to keep those raping Mexicans out he in his next breath proclaimed that he had a great relationship with Mexican waiters. They were his homey-amigos.

And just like Americans, no one even noticed any incongruity. That’s because we are ALL, EXCEPTIONAL!

Now, just watching truck after truck after truck of dead pine trees being brought into this city to be decorated and lighted up for a week or two and then tossed to the curbside to be taken away by trucks and trucks and trucks just brings merriment to Tubularsock’s soul.

And just like Americans, no one even notices any incongruity. That’s because we are ALL, EXCEPTIONAL!

But one can not miss the parade of stressed out smiling people marching in and out like zombies to every sales event in order to PROVIDE HAPPINESS which isn’t paid off until  May, 2016 if you’re lucky. Which then keeps them all sitting in cubicles day in and day out for years and they call it their life’s work.

And just like Americans, no one even notices any incongruity. That’s because we are ALL, EXCEPTIONAL!

But what if ………………………..

This year ………………………….

LIBERATION.

stop!

Wow, now how easy was that?

If you haven’t figured this out yet ………..

the force

And believe Tubularsock on this ……. you don’t have to do this.

You never did. It has alway been an illusion and you are the ONLY one who can wake up because it is YOUR dream.

And Tubularsock knows your conditioned response …… “but I, I just couldn’t”.

But you can …….. you create your own reality and you even already know this, so listen from within.

“I’M SORRY, YOUR TIME IS UP ….. THIS IS A RECORDING. YOUR PARKING TICKET MAY BE VALIDATED UPON YOUR EXIT…….. HAVE A NICE DAY” beep.  your move

RedChristmas

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