TUBULARSOCK FAMILY BORDER CROSSING
In February 2017, Reuters reported that an internal report by the Department of Homeland Security estimated that Trump’s proposed border wall would cost $21.6 billion and take 3.5 years to build. (Oh sure, it’s a little more now in 2019, but who counts?.)
To cut through the border-wall would mean buying a battery operated 20 volt reciprocating saw and about six extra charged batteries as well as the the proper blades and all that would cost one about $530.00, at Home Depot.
Tubularsock would advise one spend an additional $330.00 for a battery 20 volt grinder and 5 grinder wheels to speed your work along.
You know, time is of the essence when crossing a border!
So, Tubularsock calculates that for $860.00 you could cut through one or even two steel-concrete-rebar bollards of Trump’s beautiful border wall and push the cut bollards out of your way and defeat this $21,600,000,000.00 monstrosity and have 21billion, 599million, 999 thousand, 140 dollars and no cents left for breakfast!
Now that’s a deal even at McDonald’s!
And you can go on line and contact: Tubularsock Border Wall Adventure Tours and order up your own vacation adventure for a small no refund down payment.
Now Tubularsock knows that the standard border cutting crossing is pretty plebeian so lets cross the border the way Tubularsock would do it, OK?
This requires a bit more expense and a bit more deceptive activities but, HEY!, just how often are you going to do it?
PLASTIC EXPLOSIVES!
Now this takes a little family planning.
You (family members) place the plastic explosive in three different locations along the wall.
At a given time you “cell phone” the explosive to go off at the extreme location from your planned entry. That will focus a rapid border patrol response.
Then within minutes you “cell phone” the explosion to go off at a 2nd extreme location from your planned entry. That will focus confusion plus a rapid border patrol response.
And then you hit the button and blow a hole in the “beautiful wall” at your point of passage.
It is called a diversion entry.
Come on! THIS COULD BE JUST PLAIN FUN!
OH, DID TUBULARSOCK SAY FUCK THE BORDER PATROL?
Really, it would be only done by Tubularsock to show just how far Trump’s head is up his own ASS!
BUT THERE MAY BE AN EASIER SOLUTION TO THIS ENTIRE PROBLEM …………….
Tubularsock 