Archive for the ‘Uncategorized’ Category

TARIFF & BEER

 

A half ass Trump produces half ass policies producing half ass outcomes for a half ass country!

HOW PERFECT! Oh yes, American Exceptionalism!

Could the dumb ass get any better than this?

 

 

COKE is raising its prices and BEER is going up. Damn, those TRUMP TARIFFS are sure helping out us deplorables!

But rest assured the soybean farmers are going on corporate welfare, BMW are raising it’s prices and Harley-Davidson is moving some of its work out of the country.

Goldman Sachs projects Ford and GM will both lose $1 billion each this year because of Trump’s tariffs.

Well hell, it’s only money!

 

The interesting problem is that the trade war with China sets in motion a loss in market share.

And the longer all this continues, soybean farming will grow in other countries and once that becomes established it may NEVER shift back to the way it was before Trump’s destruction of the American soybean farmers.

But that doesn’t really matter. Fucking Dump hasn’t any stock in soybeans!

So, you got to admit that no one except The Imbecile In Chief could have bankrupted a gambling casino but THAT is the “brilliance” of Dump’s business aptitude.

You’ll understand what direction we are going economically when you see the first “garage sale” on the White House front lawn. Cash Only!

 

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LOST VALUES — SING ALONG!

Remember that old Pete Seeger folk song,

Where have all the values gone?
Long time passing

Where have all the values gone?
Long time ago

Where have all the values gone?
We have dumped them every one

When will we ever learn?
When will we ever learn?

OR WAS THAT FLOWERS?

Whatever!

Unless you have be living in a cave in Siberia you may have noticed that the values that the United States once upheld (even if they were not perfect) have pretty much been eliminated.

You remember, things like lying, cheating, torture, conflict of interest, caring for others, killing, the rule of law, taking responsibility for your actions, democracy …….. you know stuff like that.

WE HAVE NO LEADERS IN THE UNITED STATES THAT HAVE ANY OF THOSE VALUES. LET ALONE A LEADER TO STAND UP FOR THEM!

Oh sure, before they are elected they spout those values and after they are elected they spout those values but THEY NEVER SPROUT those values once they are in office. NEVER!

And when false values are the watchword of the day we really start to see for ourselves the downfall and breakup of our society.

Because if we, as a society, don’t have strong values to promote and uphold, then we have NOTHING.

If people don’t have honor within them the chances for them to be an honorable person is diminished.

And that is where we stand right now, with “one foot over the line” or was that “one toke”? Sweet Jesus.

Whatever!

So, let Tubularsock run you through an easy one, TORTURE.

THERE IS NO EXCUSE TO EVER USE TORTURE ON ANIMALS OR HUMANS EVER, PERIOD. This has to be a core value because anything less leaves you with no honor of self, period.

And yet the current President of the United States believes that it “works” and has stated that he believes in it.

And now we see that the Congress of the United States believes in torture, as well, thereby they have approved a Torturer to head the CIA, “Bloody Gina”.

And of course whenever Torture is mentioned fucking Dick Cheney is brought out of his lair to expound upon its virtues.

And Cheney, loves the virtues of torture so much that he loves to be beaten by Lynn in their dungeon to bring about sexual arousal. “Beat me, beat me Lynn!”

And just to show you that Tubularsock isn’t some liberal goody-goody, Tubularsock’s fantasy has always been meeting Dick Cheney in some dark alleyway and in one rapid movement slicing his chest cavity open with a rusty Boy Scout knife and reaching in and pulling out his beating bloody stolen heart and throwing it into a pig pen to be consumed! They’ll eat anything!

But hey, won’t happen because Tubularsock has taken an anger management seminar.

AND the fact that the statistical chances of Tubularsock encountering Dick Cheney in a dark alleyway is “ZERO” so there you go …….. math wins out!

Of course, “Bloody Gina” would not say that torture was MORALLY WRONG because she ran a torture site and should be in jail as a war criminal rather than made the head of the CIA!

But the United States has lost that value, morality.

I CAN SEE CLEARLY NOW!

Another value we have lost is TAKING RESPONSIBILITY FOR OUR ACTIONS. Have you noticed that?

“Bloody Gina” was the chief of staff for Jose Rodriguez, the director of the CIA National Clandestine Service. She was responsible for drafting a cable ordering the shredding of videotapes depicting torture sessions, despite a court order staying their destruction.

That action is against the law but not only did she “follow orders” as any good German SS solider would do BUT THE ONLY ACTION taken by any governmental body for a blatant illegal action was to promote her to CIA Director.

So with that you can throw out the RULE OF LAW as another lost value.

And remember if the RULE OF LAW principle was really practiced then George, Dick, Don, Condo, Killery, Dump, Obummer would ALL be in prison today for war crimes.

However, that value has been tossed aside.

Well, for the ruling class anyway. But don’t you jaywalk! You’ll be in the clinker!

The list goes on and on but the values are lost to our nation and won’t be coming back any time soon. The cracks in the Republic are rapidly expanding and Donald Trump is no more to blame than the American population for sitting by and selling out our principles.

As for Tubularsock, you’ll find him,
“sittin’ on the dock of the Bay, wasting time”

WHATEVER!

ARE YOU NUTS?

Well that didn’t take long!

It has only been a month.

The Parkland shooting has only increased the need for guns not the sensible other way around.

And maybe it is just a new wave of retroactive abortion.

You see regular abortion is MURDER of the fetus and respecting life is what we are all about. Right?

SURE IT IS.

Having guns in schools will diminish the youth population by just more shootings.

WHY?

It is a simple basic principle of supply and demand.

What good is a gun if you can’t use it? To sit and fondle it? Rub it up and down different body parts will only pacify a gun user just so much. And then, what always happens when you get yourself all worked up …….. RELEASE!

Arming teachers seems to be a solution. At least it is a SOLID stupid idea. Tubularsock can say that much for it.

Why not arm the homeless? Seems reasonable, right? Many homeless have been shot in the street so why not arm them?

Or the grocery clerk, the mail person, the crossing guard BUT NOT the Saloon Keeper. We need one safe place when we drink our whiskey!

In the last few days a teacher in California and a Virginia cop have accidentally discharged firearms inside their schools.

In California a 17 year old boy was hit in the neck by bullet fragments during a gun-safety course! Oops. This accident just happened after a teacher accidentally fired a semi-automatic handgun into the ceiling during a gun safety lesson. (Monterey County Herald)

The teacher also worked as a reserve police officer.

In Alexandria, Virginia a five year veteran of the Alexandria Police Department working as a school resource officer accidentally fired his gun inside his office in a 1,500-student middle school. No one was injured.

And in Michigan a sheriff left his loaded weapon in a bathroom which was found by a student who reported it to his teacher. Hey, shit happens.

So all three incidents in the past week were carried out by highly trained officers. Could that provide a clue to having an entire staff armed and dangerous?

And let us not forget Jesse Davidson, a 53-year-old social studies teacher from Alabama, who barricaded himself inside a classroom at Dalton High School with a gun. He wouldn’t let the students into the classroom and when the Principal attempted to enter with a pass key Davidson fired a random shot out the window. The police arrested him.

Seems that Davidson had some “issues”. A major one, most likely, teaching social studies in high school!

The great thing is that all of this is going on and it is just the tip of the ammunition dump or is that tip of the iceberg, whatever!

Arming the teachers?

Well it just brings Tubularsock back to retroactive birth control.

THE PLAN FOR OUR TIME.

CHILD RAPE: IT’S THE CULTURE!

Posted: November 17, 2017 in Uncategorized

CHILD RAPE: IT’S THEIR CULTURE

Tubularsock was just sitting around his top floor corner office in his underground bunker over looking Washington, D.C. from Oakland, CA (see Bunker Tour for background) when he noticed that his top-flight-NSA-resistant-carrier-pigeon came flying through the space-time-continuum-tunnel.

There was nothing out of the ordinary for this to happen except it was a direct PTTC (Pentagon To Tubularsock Communiqué).

American troops are the representatives of DEMOCRACY in Afghanistan and the fact that we have been there for 16 years and still don’t understand the Afghan customs and culture have presented some problems.

U.S. troops have been told to IGNORE child rape by Afghan Security Forces because according to U.S. commanding officers’ instructions, “. . . look the other way because it’s their culture.” (as reported by UPI)

The Pentagon, it has been found after a Defense Department investigation into the matter, had no written guidance or policy telling U.S. personnel not to report such behavior (child rape), but that it was best for it to be left alone.

In addition, those Marines that did report such activities “. . . were told that nothing could be done about child sexual abuse because of Afghanistan’s status as a sovereign nation.”

Now hold on here, Afghanistan’s status as a sovereign nation?

Since when?

If Afghanistan is a sovereign nation then the U.S. broke International Law 16 years ago by attacking a sovereign nation! And those International Laws were agreed upon and the United States signed on to them.

Police! Police! Arrest someone!

Oh, International Law only applies to OTHERS when they conduct aggression on a sovereign nation. Seems fair. Because the United States respects the law!

And then ………..

The outcome of the U.S. Department of Defense Inspector General Report was to recommend that the Department of Defense determine whether child rape by Afghan security forces constitutes “gross violations of human rights that require further review by United States Forces-Afghanistan or the Gross Violation of Human Rights Forum.”

Well there you have it. It’s official. It has taken two years to prepare the report to ask the question:

Tubularsock sure wishes the DOD would have come directly to Tubularsock for the answer. Tubularsock would have given them the answer for half the price with way less paper! The report is 106 pages long.

 

What government can accomplish if you give then enough money and paper.

And honestly, don’t dwell on this too long.

Besides, the U.S. has been raping Afghanistan for over 16 years anyway so who has time to really worry about the children?

And we’re the good guys ………….. horse shit!

 

TRUMP TWEET SOLUTION

 

OK! It is not like it takes a genius to bridge the communication gap between individuals. And that is where Tubularsock enters (stage left).

Our dear Commander of Tweets finds himself always on the cusp of some major faux pas or another because he jumps on his opinionated emotional moments and turns them into tweet-tirades and then sends them out to the world.

 

Now sure, if they are meant as missiles-of-distraction to have the citizens not see the devastation his minions are doing, at HUD, EPA, DoED and the increase in military deployment to continue the Bush-Obama-Trump Wars, then it is a brilliant tactic.

 

However if it is just a crazy-old-orange-fat-fart going off because he wants constant attention, The ME-ME-ME Syndrome, then it is just pathetic.

And like all matters of this nature people can be easily blinded by their partisan entanglements and not see the forests-from-the-tweets or The FFTT Syndrome.

Enter (stage right) X-General Kelly to bring about some semblance of order into the West Wing. But because to date he is not sleeping with the Orange-Wonder he has been unable to curve the incessant tweeting at three in the morning. Granted, in term of sleeping with either of these individuals ….. neither are even close to a 10!

But when it come to emergency measures the United States Government can always call on TUBULARSOCK for solutions for their most vexing issues. Just think if Tubularsock was called into service …………….. scared yet?

 

 

 

 

 

 

TRUMP TIME

 

You know, Tubularsock has heard from so many of Orange-Tweet’s supporters that “he’s learning the job”, “he’s cleaning the swamp”, “he’s a straight talker”.

And the only thing that these things have in common is he is NOT doing one of these things! NOT ONE!

Let Tubularsock start with the straight talker fantasy.

Talking in clichés IS NOT straight talk, it is simplistic talk about NOTHING.
Yes, it may be familiar to you but it says nothing.

To then interpret it into something meaningful doesn’t show you that TRUMP IS STUPID but just shows that YOU ARE STUPID!

 

 

And the humor value alone of Tweet “cleaning the swamp” is utterly destroyed by the people he appointed to his cabinet. Their combined IQ doesn’t reach the level of a dead rat but their ability to make a total mess out of everything they touch is down right impressive.

Tubularsock’s scum respect is at an all time high!

 

Rex Tillerson, Ben Carson, Betsy DeVos. THE SWAMP GAS-ETTES!

 

And Tubularsock’s all time top pick of the three statements is “He’s learning the job!”

Oh no he’s not ……. show Tubularsock where there is ANY sign of that!

If anything he is just recycling one set of stupid decisions and responses for a much more regressive set of stupid decisions and responses.

Even President Dumb Shrub read one to two pages of summery of the things he signed.
And Obummer read sometimes up to eight pages.

But Trump gets stumped with anything more that 280 characters.

And all of those characters center around how he views his own character. Nothing like a complete imbecile ranting how “great”, “smart”, “rich” he is while being frustrated that his greatness is not widely understood.

 

A blind man in the dark can’t see any better with the lights on but this dumb-shit thinks that a standing ovation is some type of praise rather than “seeing” that it is people standing to stampede to the door!

And don’t fear ……… it ain’t going to get any better! Recycled shit is still shit even with an orange comb-over on top of it!

You see what we have here is the crystallization of the UGLY AMERICAN! The pejorative term used for a loud, arrogant, demeaning, thoughtless, ignorant, ethnocentric behavior pattern of American citizens usually abroad.

The epitome of this behavior can be found within the membership of Mar a Largo Golf Club, Trump’s alter ego, though it is difficult to see much of a difference between his asshole behavior “at the club” and his asshole behavior in the Oval Office.

So until Tweet and Pence are flushed, it is probably best when you are out to just say to anyone who asks that you are Canadian.

 

A TUBULARSOCK EXCLUSIVE:
NEWS BEFORE IT HAPPENS!

Ok as usual, Tubularsock has an insider’s perspective into the current administration being that as Secretary of the Deplorables Tubularsock is on the “right” side of the right government policies of The Super-Bigly Great Orange One!

Rumor has it that Tubularsock has positioned himself in the current West Wing of the White House in the boiler-room where he has control of the heating and cooling of the building. Being the ONLY member of the current administration that knows the secret codes for the indoor environment of the White House puts Tubularsock in an enviable power position.

So when it was reviled by the New York Signs, a hostile progressive publication, that the
Secretary of the Deplorables had been subpoenaed by Robert Mueller much anticipation was anticipated. And as that anticipated anticipation grew the left-stream-press concluded that Russia was involved!

 

As Tubularsock, “. . . first hand coverage, second hand news”, a non-biased news outlet has reported through an official, who spoke on condition of anonymity because she was not authorized to speak to the media, that Russia may have a relationship with the Secretary of the Deplorables but this was denied by the administration.

However it was noted by a former Secret Service agent who did not wish to be identified that some ties with the Russian Government may be true. Some documentation was procured from this individual as seen below.

 

“I hasten to point out that in no sense do I claim the ideas I am submitting are a real thing. They constitute a theory, not a thesis”, stated the former Secret Service agent.

But an American official familiar with the talks with Mueller, who spoke on the condition of anonymity because he was not authorized to speak publicly stated, “some pictures are really worth a thousand words”.

Yet the investigation conducted by the sharp-eyed-reporters from Tubularsock, “. . . first hand coverage, second hand news”, a non-biased news outlet has produced an actual photograph that may add some light to the Trump-Tube Russian connection.

 

Now sure Felix Sater has Russian connections! Hell, he’s Russian!

When asked, Tubularsock, Trump’s Secretary of the Deplorables, stated, “Felix Sater is a Russian-American gangster of the old school. You know, a classical American tradition type Eliot Ness gangster. It is this solid American criminal tradition that our President believes in …… make  America Great again!”

Felix Sater has deep financial connections to Trump and to Russia. Felix Sater has been a friend of Trump’s lawyer Michael Cohen since childhood, and is an important Trump business partner who worked out of Trump Tower.

But funny, when Donald was asked about his connections with Felix, Trump said, “I’m not that familiar with him.”

Which would be expected for Trump to say especially after his associate Felix Sater, described his ambitions in emails to Trump’s lawyer Michael Cohen.

In those emails Sater states, “Our boy can become president of the USA and we can engineer it. I will get all of Putins team to buy in on this, I will manage this process.” (New York Times … for real!)

So we all have, so far, three possible Russian connections with Trump.

The first is the meeting in Trump Tower between Russian agents and Donald Trump Jr., Paul Manafort, and Jared Kushner.

The second connection is the attempt by Republican operative Peter W. Smith to obtain Hillary Clinton’s emails through Russian hackers. According to The Wall Street Journal “Robert Mueller is investigating Michael Flynn’s connection to this operation”.

And the third connection is Felix Sater.

Looks like a full plate.

 

But in truth the Russian connection is there but it is mostly bullshit. The real deal is going to be the evidence that is being collected on financial crimes, including potential money laundering that is where Donald and his family are going to go down!