Archive for the ‘Religion’ Category

JEFF SESSIONS, GOAT FUCKER?

 

It has been many years now that Tubularsock was wandering Europe. But all of this Naziesque crap being directed by OrangeTurd and his trusty companion BibleThumper Jeff has brought back a long forgotten conversation.

Tubularsock was driving through Germany with a trusted friend. We were taking the “slow” way through the German hinterland and was driving through the Black Forest area with no real destination in mind.

The evergreen forests and picturesque villages were right out of a “living” traveler guidebook. An amazing area of Germany to visit especially if you are a meandering traveler.

It was there, sitting in the car at a pullout that our conversation began. If we had been German citizens during the rise of Hitler and if we had been living in this area of German, just how knowledgeable would we have been about Auschwitz in Poland and what was happening in Germany at large as well?

As the hate and fear was propagated that “others” were not worthy of our concern just how shutdown to this oncoming evil would we have grokked?

Tubularsock has many German friends that have stated that their parent’s generation, after the war, would NOT EVEN discuss this subject or explain how they had been duped by Hitler and his hate filled belief system. The shame was too great and they didn’t want to explain their role of even being citizens in that mess.

Jump to Jeff Session interpreting the Bible, Romans 13 suggesting that God supports the government in separating immigrant parents from their children.

 

And it looks to Tubularsock that Jeff has as much knowledge as Tubularsock has about Biblical interpretation when Tubularsock interprets Isaiah 11:6 “. . . the leopard will lie down with the goat . . .” to mean that Jeff Sessions fucks goats!

Now, Tubularsock may not be the best Biblical scholar, however, it just goes to show you that Jeff too is rather selective at cherry picking passages of the Bible for his own political purposes. Shame on you Jeff, you old goat fucker!

 

And then we have Plastic Melania in her “I Don’t Care, Do U” coat going off to see the children in jail to bestow her “motherly love” with her magic wand.

Leaving Barron home alone with his unstable Orange-“father”.

Poor, Poor Barron, assumed to have been born from a turkey baster impregnation so Plastic Mom didn’t have to have that gross Fat-Orange-Body thrusting and panting attempting to get a hard on to do the job.

 

FREE BARRON!, FREE BARRON!, FREE BARRON!

 

Wow, speaking of child molestation! Can you imagine having to be trapped in a “family” with Donald Jr., Ivanka, and Eric!

Tiffany is not so bad.

But leave it to Peter Fonda to hit the nail on the head with his tweet calling for Barron to be “. . . ripped from his mother’s arms and put in a cage with pedophiles.”

Of course, Peter apologized later saying he had been upset over Trump’s Policy and he had “. . . tweeted something highly inappropriate and vulgar about the president and his family in response to the devastating images I was seeing on television.”

OH CONTRAIR!

The pedophile part WAS a little bit over the top but at least the cage would help protect Barron from Plastic-mom, Orange-dad, and the evil Munchkins!

But unlike the children stolen from their parents at the border Plastic-mom had the U.S. Secret Service notified. Some kids warrant special attention.

 

FREE BARRON!, FREE BARRON!, FREE BARRON!

 

So Plastic-I-Don’t-Care wanted to see for herself what was happening to the imprisoned children of Latin American descent so, if you can believe this, she was sent to a facility opened to the first lady which was, of course, selected keeping in mind the press would be accompanying her.

“Other such facilities around the country have denied access to Democratic lawmakers and media”.

You know, like any good DEMOCRATIC society would do. Prevent Congress from representing the people they are supposed to represent and be the eyes of the people. Republicans are prevented as well. You know, to keep it fair.

Well, it sure fooled Plastic I-Don’t-Care!

Tubularsock is sure that everyone was on best behavior for the Plastic-Lady! She thanked everyone for a job well done and then got into her jet and flew back to Washington, D.C.

She left with her parting words that the U.S. should “govern with heart”!

And Tubularsock agrees and just maybe it has come time to pull that used heart of Dick Cheney and plant it into Donald. That heart never seemed to work for Cheney anyway.

The Nazi mind set is running again and the American public can be awakened to the possible further destruction of what is left of American Values which weren’t that strong to begin with or we can watch the edges of the toilet bowl as we all swirl down into the depth of the Black Forest never to be seen again.

 

It actually is up to US!

Trump has embarrassed the United States of America in the World and as his Scottish-born mother’s relatives have stated: “His Mother had been acutely embarrassed by the antics of her fourth child during the 1990s when his failing marriage and business were the subject of intense tabloid scrutiny.

Mary Trump died in 2000, but if his mother was upset with his crap in the 1990’s she must be turning over in her grave NOW!

And as for dear daddy, Fred C. Trump with his German ancestry as a nap-sack was arrested at a Ku Klux Klan riot in New York in 1927, records reveal. He died in 1999.

 

Need Tubularsock say more? The racist apple hasn’t fallen far from the tree, now has it!

 

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NEWS BEFORE IT HAPPENS!

“Well-placed” sources close to the Secretary of State have stated that Tubularsock, 
The Secretary of the Deplorables, has an uncanny ability to “fit-in” well with North Koreans due to his kimchi knowledge.

Tubularsock speaks Kimchi fluently as well as several other Vegan Languages.

Some have insinuated that the Secretary may be working “undercover” for the CIA after Tubularsock was overheard saying that “. . . the U.S. should cover-over the undercover and close the drawer on the issue at hand.”

 

This comment was verified by an official who spoke on condition of anonymity due to the laws in place about discussing sensitive diplomatic issues.

The comment occurred between Tubularsock and a room service maid at the TRUMP PYONGYANG HOTEL, according to a senior White House official involved in the preparations.

IN FURTHER NEWS:

Christmas is upon us and a miracle has occurred. The Big Bang Theory has been proven correct as demonstrated by the following cosmic insight by none other than TUBULARSOCK!

 

PENIS WAVING: AMERICA’S PASTIME!

Tubularsock has been scraping around in the gutter of American sexual predators not because many men in power and many men with no power can be found there but more importantly ……. WHAT IS NEW?

This entire avalanche of the sexual predator exposé is pretty sick and sad. But it has answered three questions for Tubularsock about America.

First and foremost is a question that Tubularsock has asked himself many times.

Why is it that with 365 days a year and 24 hours in each of those days and a staff of three aides or more can’t a Senator or Representative READ THE BILLS he/she signs into law?

Case in point: The new TAX OVERHAUL bill is over 500 “government pages” long. “Government Pages” is a code phrase Tubularsock uses and it means 2/3rds of those pages are fluff-bull-shit and 1/3rd of those pages are refined bull shit.

To read those pages BEFORE you sign the bill, you’d think, would be the job of a Senator or Representative, RIGHT?

Well no. It appears that one’s reading time is reduced by 85% if the Senator’s or Representative’s entire concentration is focused on master-bating on their secretary’s desk in front of her or grabbing her tit!

See how quickly priorities change under these Congressional circumstances?

SO NOW TUBULARSOCK UNDERSTANDS WHY OUR LAWMAKERS ARE NOT DOING THEIR JOB WE ELECTED THEM TO DO!

And the ones that aren’t doing the “doing” are gossiping about it and with everyone knowing, where is this outrage and surprise coming from anyway?

And then add to it THE PUBLIC already knows as well. So why this outrage? We have ALWAYS known.

 

The second question answered for Tubularsock is why in general do European films have so much more depth than American films. And the reason is that European films depict actual human relations while American films tend to express the fantasy of the constant hard-on and then the constant “explosions” as the sign of “manhood” and hero worship.

The Hollywood directors, actors, and producers start to believe their own hype from these shallow movies and believe THEY ARE THE MANHOOD HERO. Fantasy gone mad.

And then the third question answered.

This is no surprise at all really but just substantiates Tubularsock’s suspicion.
The TV anchor. What an empty job to sit through day after day after day, spewing master bated endless bull shit written by others that you repeat with “honesty” and “warmth” calling yourself a journalist!

Talking about a reason to look for something to do “for real”!

Even if you start out with some integrity it isn’t long before when the little red light goes off you’ll repeat whatever they put on the teleprompter. Even if you know it is lies.

When you sell your soul why not “grab some pussy on the side”!

After all, the President of the United States swears by it even if the First Pussy won’t hold his hand!

FOR FURTHER READING MAY TUBULARSOCK SUGGEST:

1.Tubularsock’s Guide To Sexual Harassment “a hands on guide to hands off, the do’s and don’t s”.

2. Tubularsock’s New York Bestseller, Getting Close To The Children, “the priest’s guide to fondling the flock.”

3. And don’t miss, Fucking Around The Mall co-written by Tubularsock and Want Moore.

And then it is advised that you take The Tubularsock Workshop on Old Enough To Bleed, Old Enough To Slaughter an Alabama Evangelical Christian teaching of NOT sparing “the rod” with 14 year old girls, amen.

 

 

WON’T YOU HOLD MY HAND?

 

The amount of time spent on the Trump’s hands you’d think that the entire Middle Eastern trip was based on hand holding. Now Orange Tweet did damn near kiss the fucking Saudi king’s ass but who counts? Anyway, far be it for Tubularsock to get in the way of the maimed-stream-media’s news flow of worthless shit. Only because it is just too fun!

They kept Orange Tweet on a short leash and he read all the words he was given so we can all agree that he was SO PRESIDENTIAL.

As long as he stays in puppet mode all will be “handled”. See, the Deep State is benevolent.

 

 

TUBULARSOCK ART APPRECIATION

 

It is rare that Tubularsock can pull out his paint by number art experience and be able the capture the essence of a moment. Well here it is literally in Black and White!

Few in the press were aware that right after Tubularsock finished this painting The Pope, The Trumps, and The Tube went to a barn dance at the Vatican.

The Trump’s brought their own BULL SHIT! So fancy-dancy of them.

 

TROJAN TRUMP
You know what Tubularsock LIKES about Republicans?

And it is not that they don’t spin it to the Exceptionalistic-American-Brain-Dead that they are doing it to make America Great Again, they do spin it that way.

And the Exceptionalistic-American-Brain-Dead BELIEVE it the same way as they believe that TIDE makes cloths brighter!

You may not like this Trump crowd but they are up front in their directed destruction.

Unlike the Democrat’s elite, you know the Clinton-Obama Cartel, that fucks you over but does it behind the facade of “caring”! You know, “A Humanitarian-War”.

And their followers too believe in TIDE.

So all of this whirlwind of Trumpism coming down the tracks every news cycle is just dust thrown in our eyes. There is a constant barrage of distraction.

So you may want to pay attention to the man BEHIND the curtain, Steve Bannon. The so called “brain” behind the voided-headed-Trump.

You see Steve, it has been revealed, LOVES WAR and as a result he “attacks” life AS A WAR. He is a big fan of the Chinese military treatise The Art of War (孫子兵法) by Sun Tzu.

This little treasure of war has 13 chapters giving “directions” on how to go about WAR.
And not to labor over YOUR next war but it is interesting in light of what is currently going on to read how it is done.

For example Chapter 2, explains how “success requires winning decisive engagements quickly”. Hence, the rapid signing statement fury. In Trump’s case it was the appearance of fast action to something that looks impressive in the press but in fact will be in the courts for some time. It wasn’t really a slam-dunk. But appearance “trumps” reality!

And Chapter 3, the source of strength of a strategic attack is defined in terms of unity, not size. Explaining why the inner circle is seemly a tight group.

Now this is just a hint from Tubularsock of how things are being orchestrated but we may not like the tune.

Every few minutes the 24-hour news cycle whips up everything from the Russians are the cause of EVERYTHING to Vice President Pence doesn’t dine with women without his wife being present.

The important thing is to look a bit deeper because what seems to be HEADLINES is the least you have to worry about!

Now on the brighter side, you may not really want to know. That of course is very “normal” for the dysfunctional American family. Daddy is fucking his daughter but we all go to church on Sunday to keep up our “loving” family image in the community. That has been the modus operandi of the American public, as so obviously displayed on 9/11.

Oh sure, three buildings fell down at free fall speed into their own footprint and most of the “terrorist’s” were from Saudi Arabia ……… let’s bomb Afghanistan!

So all of this just goes to show you that the obvious is obvious but denial makes you feel better. THAT’S AMERICA FOR YOU!

POWER ANIMAL