Archive for the ‘Religion’ Category

NEWS BEFORE IT HAPPENS!

“Well-placed” sources close to the Secretary of State have stated that Tubularsock, 
The Secretary of the Deplorables, has an uncanny ability to “fit-in” well with North Koreans due to his kimchi knowledge.

Tubularsock speaks Kimchi fluently as well as several other Vegan Languages.

Some have insinuated that the Secretary may be working “undercover” for the CIA after Tubularsock was overheard saying that “. . . the U.S. should cover-over the undercover and close the drawer on the issue at hand.”

 

This comment was verified by an official who spoke on condition of anonymity due to the laws in place about discussing sensitive diplomatic issues.

The comment occurred between Tubularsock and a room service maid at the TRUMP PYONGYANG HOTEL, according to a senior White House official involved in the preparations.

IN FURTHER NEWS:

Christmas is upon us and a miracle has occurred. The Big Bang Theory has been proven correct as demonstrated by the following cosmic insight by none other than TUBULARSOCK!

 

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PENIS WAVING: AMERICA’S PASTIME!

Tubularsock has been scraping around in the gutter of American sexual predators not because many men in power and many men with no power can be found there but more importantly ……. WHAT IS NEW?

This entire avalanche of the sexual predator exposé is pretty sick and sad. But it has answered three questions for Tubularsock about America.

First and foremost is a question that Tubularsock has asked himself many times.

Why is it that with 365 days a year and 24 hours in each of those days and a staff of three aides or more can’t a Senator or Representative READ THE BILLS he/she signs into law?

Case in point: The new TAX OVERHAUL bill is over 500 “government pages” long. “Government Pages” is a code phrase Tubularsock uses and it means 2/3rds of those pages are fluff-bull-shit and 1/3rd of those pages are refined bull shit.

To read those pages BEFORE you sign the bill, you’d think, would be the job of a Senator or Representative, RIGHT?

Well no. It appears that one’s reading time is reduced by 85% if the Senator’s or Representative’s entire concentration is focused on master-bating on their secretary’s desk in front of her or grabbing her tit!

See how quickly priorities change under these Congressional circumstances?

SO NOW TUBULARSOCK UNDERSTANDS WHY OUR LAWMAKERS ARE NOT DOING THEIR JOB WE ELECTED THEM TO DO!

And the ones that aren’t doing the “doing” are gossiping about it and with everyone knowing, where is this outrage and surprise coming from anyway?

And then add to it THE PUBLIC already knows as well. So why this outrage? We have ALWAYS known.

 

The second question answered for Tubularsock is why in general do European films have so much more depth than American films. And the reason is that European films depict actual human relations while American films tend to express the fantasy of the constant hard-on and then the constant “explosions” as the sign of “manhood” and hero worship.

The Hollywood directors, actors, and producers start to believe their own hype from these shallow movies and believe THEY ARE THE MANHOOD HERO. Fantasy gone mad.

And then the third question answered.

This is no surprise at all really but just substantiates Tubularsock’s suspicion.
The TV anchor. What an empty job to sit through day after day after day, spewing master bated endless bull shit written by others that you repeat with “honesty” and “warmth” calling yourself a journalist!

Talking about a reason to look for something to do “for real”!

Even if you start out with some integrity it isn’t long before when the little red light goes off you’ll repeat whatever they put on the teleprompter. Even if you know it is lies.

When you sell your soul why not “grab some pussy on the side”!

After all, the President of the United States swears by it even if the First Pussy won’t hold his hand!

FOR FURTHER READING MAY TUBULARSOCK SUGGEST:

1.Tubularsock’s Guide To Sexual Harassment “a hands on guide to hands off, the do’s and don’t s”.

2. Tubularsock’s New York Bestseller, Getting Close To The Children, “the priest’s guide to fondling the flock.”

3. And don’t miss, Fucking Around The Mall co-written by Tubularsock and Want Moore.

And then it is advised that you take The Tubularsock Workshop on Old Enough To Bleed, Old Enough To Slaughter an Alabama Evangelical Christian teaching of NOT sparing “the rod” with 14 year old girls, amen.

 

 

WON’T YOU HOLD MY HAND?

 

The amount of time spent on the Trump’s hands you’d think that the entire Middle Eastern trip was based on hand holding. Now Orange Tweet did damn near kiss the fucking Saudi king’s ass but who counts? Anyway, far be it for Tubularsock to get in the way of the maimed-stream-media’s news flow of worthless shit. Only because it is just too fun!

They kept Orange Tweet on a short leash and he read all the words he was given so we can all agree that he was SO PRESIDENTIAL.

As long as he stays in puppet mode all will be “handled”. See, the Deep State is benevolent.

 

 

TUBULARSOCK ART APPRECIATION

 

It is rare that Tubularsock can pull out his paint by number art experience and be able the capture the essence of a moment. Well here it is literally in Black and White!

Few in the press were aware that right after Tubularsock finished this painting The Pope, The Trumps, and The Tube went to a barn dance at the Vatican.

The Trump’s brought their own BULL SHIT! So fancy-dancy of them.

 

TROJAN TRUMP
You know what Tubularsock LIKES about Republicans?

And it is not that they don’t spin it to the Exceptionalistic-American-Brain-Dead that they are doing it to make America Great Again, they do spin it that way.

And the Exceptionalistic-American-Brain-Dead BELIEVE it the same way as they believe that TIDE makes cloths brighter!

You may not like this Trump crowd but they are up front in their directed destruction.

Unlike the Democrat’s elite, you know the Clinton-Obama Cartel, that fucks you over but does it behind the facade of “caring”! You know, “A Humanitarian-War”.

And their followers too believe in TIDE.

So all of this whirlwind of Trumpism coming down the tracks every news cycle is just dust thrown in our eyes. There is a constant barrage of distraction.

So you may want to pay attention to the man BEHIND the curtain, Steve Bannon. The so called “brain” behind the voided-headed-Trump.

You see Steve, it has been revealed, LOVES WAR and as a result he “attacks” life AS A WAR. He is a big fan of the Chinese military treatise The Art of War (孫子兵法) by Sun Tzu.

This little treasure of war has 13 chapters giving “directions” on how to go about WAR.
And not to labor over YOUR next war but it is interesting in light of what is currently going on to read how it is done.

For example Chapter 2, explains how “success requires winning decisive engagements quickly”. Hence, the rapid signing statement fury. In Trump’s case it was the appearance of fast action to something that looks impressive in the press but in fact will be in the courts for some time. It wasn’t really a slam-dunk. But appearance “trumps” reality!

And Chapter 3, the source of strength of a strategic attack is defined in terms of unity, not size. Explaining why the inner circle is seemly a tight group.

Now this is just a hint from Tubularsock of how things are being orchestrated but we may not like the tune.

Every few minutes the 24-hour news cycle whips up everything from the Russians are the cause of EVERYTHING to Vice President Pence doesn’t dine with women without his wife being present.

The important thing is to look a bit deeper because what seems to be HEADLINES is the least you have to worry about!

Now on the brighter side, you may not really want to know. That of course is very “normal” for the dysfunctional American family. Daddy is fucking his daughter but we all go to church on Sunday to keep up our “loving” family image in the community. That has been the modus operandi of the American public, as so obviously displayed on 9/11.

Oh sure, three buildings fell down at free fall speed into their own footprint and most of the “terrorist’s” were from Saudi Arabia ……… let’s bomb Afghanistan!

So all of this just goes to show you that the obvious is obvious but denial makes you feel better. THAT’S AMERICA FOR YOU!

POWER ANIMAL

Tube book headingLEARNING CURVE 3

FOREIGN POLICY

If there isn’t a crisis, it appears, there isn’t any news! So right there you can see that it’s still all the same no matter how much you protest.

President Elect Tweet’s transition team is like a “war zone”!

Who is in?

Who is out?

It is no surprise that “draining the swamp” is way more difficult in reality than in rhetoric and trying to keep “lobbyists” out of positions is like going to a snake farm and hoping for no snakes.

And having President Elect Tweet express that “Only he knows the finalists” to be chosen with names ricocheting around the press like firing a shotgun in a steel box doesn’t provide much stability.

Oh well, what good is a cabinet anyway when the guy shoots from the hip. Tubularsock figures it’s at least somebody he can talk to.

The best thing is getting his kids cleared for government secrets. He seems to at least trust them so in order to have open discussions and not end up like Hillary and her open-to-all internet server President Elect Tweet is protecting himself upfront.

The speculation from EVERY direction will keep this process hopping for weeks and the one interesting thing about short-attention-span-Tweet is that he will “fire” any of the “chosen ones” at a drop of a Make America Great Again hat!

But no matter, Tubularsock is conducting his third lesson directing President Elect Tweet with a step into a Foreign Policy/Domestic Policy combo. This will help Tweet understand that there is a connection with what happens outside the country and what happens inside the country. This a big step for President Elect Tweet but after all it IS our third lesson!

tube-mooslim

HALLELUJAH!

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