Tubularsock has JUST figured it out!
And now let Tubularsock say it before others …… “thank you Tubularsock!”
Well, Tubularsock has many hats, sort of speak, and then with cleaning the bunker and all, well it took some time to figure it out ……….
Anyway ………
Even after you figure it out it’s not without confusion.
Now there is al Qaeda, and al Qaeda in the Arabian Peninsula, and al Qaeda in the Islamic Maghreb and ISIL, Islamic State of Iraq and the Levant (Islamic State) or ISIS, Islamic State in Iraq and Syria or DAIISH (or DIISH or DAISH) the group’s name in Arabic al dawla al islamiyye f’il iraq w’al sham …….. aren’t acronyms fun?
The last three are the same group which is confusing in the first place.
And then the Al-Nusra Front, and Al-Shabaab, and 63 others on the United States terrorists list.
But the new kid on the block is the Khorasan group. Oh yea!
And they don’t even appear on the terrorist list!
The Pentagon said that they were “seasoned al Qaeda veterans”!
AND these battle-hardened al Qaeda fighters travelled from Afghanistan, Pakistan and elsewhere to Syria allegedly to plot several attacks on American interests.
And GET SCARED because the leader of this band of merry men is Muhsin al-Fadhli, a designated terrorist and apparent 9/11 insider who received advance notification that terrorists would strike the United States on September 11, 2001, along with George W. Bush, Condoleezza Rice, Dick Cheney, the CIA, the FBI, the Mossad, the SVR (the Russian Foreign Intelligence Service), the Saudi Intelligence Agency and some Israeli “students” who were taking pictures and jumping for joy as it was happening.
But Muhsin al-Fadhli is no longer with us because our bomb attack wiped him out! Or that is what the “social-media” has been reporting.
But Susan Rice, the U.S. National Security Advisor stated, “We can’t confirm that at this stage. We’ve seen reports on social media to that effect. We will continue to look for signs as to whether or not that’s, in fact, the case.”
So you can see that EXTREME EVIL may be impervious to death no matter if the bombing mission cost us $500 million dollars!
Now don’t you worry. Remember in our last escapade when we would kill the worst of the worst al Qaeda leader only to discovery that a new leader would appear and we’d kill him and then the next ……
Well, trust Tubularsock on this, there are plenty to go around!
And as for the “FACT” that these seasoned battle-hardened al Qaeda fighters that make up the Khorasan group are sitting all together to be bomb is got to be amazing when we were lead to believe by Dick Cheney that the “worst of the worst” of al Qaeda were locked up in Guantanamo.
Wow, just who can one believe?
Anyway ……. there is plenty of fear to go around.
You see Muhsin al-Fadhli is/was being trained by the SCARIEST OF SCARIEST bomb maker that the world has ever known, Ibrahim al-Asiri !!!!!!
Ibrahim al-Asiri was the “chief” bomb maker of al Qaeda in the Arabian Peninsula.
He was responsible for making the bomb that was used in the “2009 Christmas Day bomb plot” in which the Nigerian passenger, Umar Farouk Abdulmutallab, attempted to set off plastic explosives sewn to his underwear.
The result was Abdulmutallab burnt his dick but the bomb failed!
And then Ibrahim al-Asiri also made the bombs for the “2010 cargo plane bomb plot” in which plastic explosives and a detonating mechanism, were found on separate cargo planes. The plastic explosives were hidden in a printer cartridges in each plane.
These bombs were never detonated but were discovered as a result of intelligence received from Saudi Arabia’s security network.
So this is all the work of the MASTERMIND BOMB MAKER attacking the United States. Three bombs no explosions.
Scared yet?
Well Ibrahim al-Asiri did have one, kind-of successful, bomb that he made detonate.
And that is the one where he took the plastic explosives and shoved them up the “rectum” of his 23 year old brother, Abdullah al-Asiri. Abdullah then detonated himself in an attempt to assassinate Muhammad bin Nayef, the Saudi deputy minister of Interior but he detonated his plastic-explosive-rectum-device by cell phone too early and Nayef was only slightly injured.
Needless to say Abdullah did not fair as well. Could it be that he dialed the wrong number?
So what we have here is a hint that the al-Asiri family aren’t the brightest crayons in the box. One brother can’t make a workable bomb except the one he put up his younger brother’s rectum.
And the younger brother who has his head up his ass even to agree to having plastic explosives shoved in his butt!
Yet, Ibrahim is the guy that is helping the now blown up Khorasan group to make bombs.
What is wrong with this picture?
And to make matters worse if you remember the “Christmas Bomber” was escorted onto that passenger fight without being run through security and without a passport! Say What!
So this is the MASTERMIND BOMB MAKER that has frightened the United States to bomb the Khorasan group?
But that isn’t the only bombing that has occurred due to Ibrahim and his bomb making attempts. Last year a CIA drone strike took out Ahmed Said Saad, a Syrian medical doctor who had been working with Ibrahim on his experiments.
You see, the rectum-bomb worked, it actually blew-up! So Ibrahim teamed up with Ahmed Said Saad (a medical doctor) before the CIA droned him and according to U.S. officials succeeded in developing a bomb that can be surgically implanted inside the human body. The military refers to such a weapon as a “surgically implanted improvised explosive device,” or SIIED. …….. aren’t acronyms fun?
So the plan is that radicalized Westerners who have Western passports will be implanted with these implanted bombs and blow themselves up within the United States.
And to think that Ibrahim al-Asiri, dropped out of his chemistry class in college which just goes to show you that “a little knowledge is a dangerous thing”.
Anyway this is what Tubularsock has figured out. The solution to these deadly human weapons. And how to detonate them BEFORE they cause damage to others.
Well we could take the old fashion approach and just stop bombing people so as not to make MORE terrorists but sane approaches are not respected due to the simple fact that by doing that huge profits would have to be forfeited …… need Tubularsock say more?
An approach needs to be expensive, wasteful, and secret because that is the only way the public will believe they are safe.
Now Tubularsock is used to being ridiculed and persecuted for his futuristic ideas but that has never stopped him before. Mockery and derision is always directed at those on the cutting edge.
And huge profit? …….. Tubularsock can get behind that but only because saving the nation is the only patriotic priority.
Now if you would care to invest in Tubularsock’s new venture just send a check, cash, bit coin, a goat, a pick-up truck, a bushel of non-GMO corn to:
New Technology Mega Data Implementation, Ltd.
333 Underground Bunker
Secret City, CA 66633-5484
Now here is the expensive, wasteful, and secret plan. WARNING, it is in code.
Now Tubularsock has estimated that there are “X” number of terrorists.
The NSA has EVERYBODY’S cell phone number.
The number of terrorists with cell phones are “XY”
The number of non-terrorist with cell phones are “Z”
Are you still following this? Don’t you have something better to do with your time?
X – XY= WYZ
Z – WXZ= HZYU The exact number of terrorists using cell phones.
Or something like that ………
So NTMDI, Ltd. will call every “HZYU” every six minutes ( the seventh minute we rest).
So if a terrorist is in the process of carrying a SIIED he’d explode ……
And NTMDI, Ltd would charge $3.00 per call to the government or NTMDI, Ltd + HZYU = a fucking great deal of $$$$$$$$. ………. Aren’t acronyms fun?
What do you think? Brilliant or what?
Ok, bottom line …… the U.S. Government will fall for this and if Tubularsock can get enough Congressmen/women to fall for this WE (my investors) will be catapulted into the 1%!
Hell, we’ll even be able to use the United States Senate’s Gym to do push-ups!
Save the accolades for later ……. cash is preferred!
THE THEY DID IT!
Tubularsock 