Archive for the ‘MELANIA TRUMP’ Category

THE PUERTO RICAN SHUFFLE!

Well you can’t beat Trump out Trumping Trump in his goal of being the dumbest retard that has entered into the White House of the United States of America. And Tubularsock isn’t interested in giving those that are dealing with retardation a bad name. And in today’s “correct speak” Tubularsock figures “mentally challenged” has replaced retardation as a more understanding and sensitive term.

EXCEPT NOT when Tubularsock can spot a fucking moronic-retard at thirty paces! And Donald Trump IS AT THE TOP of that definition.

Tubularsock was a bit concerned when the almost catastrophe in Las Vegas didn’t warrant a special golf trophy but after all, it wasn’t a Katrina.

It’s all in who gets killed. But Dumb-Fuck-Lump sent out HIS WARMEST CONDOLENCES to those in Las Vegas which only means a temperature of 30-below. But hey, it’s the best he can do! Explains why Melania won’t hold his hand doesn’t it.

And Congress is sending out their prayers to all of the dead and are getting ready to pass a law to RELAX LAWS ON SILENCERS! And that is because Stephen Paddock, the Las Vegas gunman might have gotten a hearing loss if he hadn’t got himself dead first!

No really, this new law Congress, is wanting to pass, “The Hearing Protection Act”, is to relax laws on silencers so as to protect gun uses from hearing loss. And if Paddock had had the advantage of silencers his success rate at killing would have reach Katrina standards and THAT WOULD CONSTITUTE A CATASTROPHE!

So don’t you worry about any of this! “Sadly, violence will always be part of our lives,” is Sen. Ted Cruz’s take on all this. So Tubularsock has sent Ted an invitation to a Texan Country Western Concert. Tubularsock asked him to wear red.

 

And “People are going to have to take steps in their own lives to take precautions to protect themselves,” the South Dakota Senator John Thune offered up as a solution. Tubularsock invited John and his family to the South Dakota state fair. You know all that wide open space.

 

Oh, and then you have Mitch McConnell from Kentucky who is the Senate Majority Leader with his pearls of wisdom: “I think it’s particularly inappropriate to politicize an event like this, it just happened in the last day-and-a-half. It’s entirely premature to be discussing legislative solutions, if any.” Yep, Tubularsock understands, Mitch, hell the bodies are still warm. Can’t think about machine gun hunting rifles and huge magazines until ahh ……..

So Mitch, agreed to go out hunting with Dick Cheney. Glad that’s settled!

 

And finally, to get real American Main Stream, what is with this hat Melania was wearing when she got off the plane in Puerto Rico?

NO, one has to wonder just how low this country can go. You know like the limbo from Trinidad except in the United States it’s known as the lobotomy and it has worked on the population well enough to elect Orange-Tweet and his plastic family!

 

 

 

 

 

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SCARAMUCCI THE DOUCHE, FLUSHED!

The humor train is still racing down the tracks in Tweet’s White House. Removing Anthony Scaramucci, the ultimate douche-bag, because of his erratic speech patterns such as using “cock blocking” as a government tactic was so shocking EVEN to the pussy grabbing Commander of Sleaze!

“The president certainly felt that Anthony’s comments were inappropriate for a person in that position,” stated Sarah Huckabee Sanders, the White House press secretary.

Hot damn, that is got to be one of the most hypocritical statements so far in this administration. How funny can it get.

The crime is Anthony out Trumped Trump! THAT gets you fucking fired, dude!

Melania Trump and Ivanka were “disgusted” and “offended” by Scaramucci’s expletive-laden interview with the New Yorker Magazine. You know, being both plastic filled women and used to pussy grabbing just finds cock blocking something they have to do every time Orange-Tweet comes near them!

Melania even has gone as far as not even wanting to hold the hand that touches that part of Orange Tweets body. Now that shows good judgement!

 

But there will be more, so stay tuned for ************** the downfall of John Kelly as he ****************

“ENDS THE WHITE HOUSE CHAOS” episode 13.

See the Commander of Chaos chained to his chair just out of reach of the “tweet-machine”. It is called RADICAL INTERVENTION!

Oh, has anyone noticed that the Pentagon is setting up to hit North Korea? Hell folks, it is literally a tweet away form coming to pass. But look over here, as Garfunkel and Oates sings,  “This Party Took a Turn for the Douche”!

 

YOU ARE THAT.

Have you ever noticed that few people are seldom satisfied with their lives.

If they don’t have a loving relationship they want one.
If they do have a loving relationship then it is more difficult than they expected.

If they don’t have a great job then they want one.
If they do have a job great then it would be better if work started at 10.

If they don’t have children they want some.
If they do have children then they DON’T want them. With a caveat that it is really great but …… or only if ……..

If they don’t have good health then they wish that they had it.
If they do have good health then they never get to use their health insurance but have to pay for it!

And on and on and on ………….

WHY IS THAT?

Well finally ……. the question has been asked. For the eleven millionth time.

And because Tubularsock has a degree (about 90 Fahrenheit) Tubularsock is hot!

The answer is very simple:

We have been taught to look in the wrong direction.

Look IN not out.

YOU ALREADY HAVE EVERYTHING! PERIOD!

But what is the first question you get asked as a child?
What are you going to BE when you grow up?

“BE?” YOU ARE ALREADY THAT! And you know what they do to you if you think you are two people, right?

So the job is to reverse “thinking” because you have been programmed incorrectly.

The fun part for Tubularsock is all the “logic and argument” that is always brought up about all of this ………. doesn’t matter.

YOU ARE THAT. Everything else is just false programming.

You ARE the force, that is why it’s with you.

Well now that that is settled Tubularsock and Yoda can sit down for their second bowl of Afghani Hash.

Hell, it just goes to show you that the CIA is good for something!

 

 

WON’T YOU HOLD MY HAND?

 

The amount of time spent on the Trump’s hands you’d think that the entire Middle Eastern trip was based on hand holding. Now Orange Tweet did damn near kiss the fucking Saudi king’s ass but who counts? Anyway, far be it for Tubularsock to get in the way of the maimed-stream-media’s news flow of worthless shit. Only because it is just too fun!

They kept Orange Tweet on a short leash and he read all the words he was given so we can all agree that he was SO PRESIDENTIAL.

As long as he stays in puppet mode all will be “handled”. See, the Deep State is benevolent.

 

 

TUBULARSOCK ART APPRECIATION

 

It is rare that Tubularsock can pull out his paint by number art experience and be able the capture the essence of a moment. Well here it is literally in Black and White!

Few in the press were aware that right after Tubularsock finished this painting The Pope, The Trumps, and The Tube went to a barn dance at the Vatican.

The Trump’s brought their own BULL SHIT! So fancy-dancy of them.

 

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