Archive for the ‘Religiosity’ Category

SARAH’S SAD STORY HITS HARD

 

Tubularsock realizes that there is a wealth of sad stories out there in the big wide wonderful world and this is only one of them but ……. and Tubularsock warns you,
this will bring tears to your eyes and so close to Christmas too!

Sarah Huckabee Sanders is packing her Adidas Santiago Mini Duffel Bag with all her honest news notes she has given out to the press during her time as OrangeDick’s press secretary.

In addition it has taken nine semi trucks with extended trailers to carry away her lying news notes defending the OrangeButterBall.

She is still collecting her near $180,000 salary until she parts, heading out and off of the White House lawn.

 

Sarah Huckabee Sanders, the daughter of former Governor of Arkansas Mike Huckabee, a Southern Baptist minister, learned so well about lying, “much like Christ did in the Bible from her Bible thumping father.

And about “pussy grabbing” as perhaps God dabbled in on the side.

And maybe even thoughts of incest with Ivanka.

Are those “sins” supported by Preacher Huckabee as a “good-loving” Southern Baptist?

Hell, it’s just the way they are! Amen.

The three guiding principles of the Hucksters are lying, grabbing, Incest or THE THREE I’S AS SOUTHERN BAPTIST CALL THEM!

Tubularsock just can’t wait until Sarah’s children become teenagers.

Sarah’s “lying at any cost” activities that she executed so well will crop right up when her kids become teenagers and at that time will bite her on her huge derriere.

Couldn’t happen to a nicer person.

 

ATTENTION:

A PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT

 

 

 

 

 

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THE SHIT IS THE SHINOLA

 

Are you happy yet?

Tubularsock has run through all the major YouTube comedy shows to attempt to find at least ONE laugh that would relieve Tubularsock’s total and complete outrage and disgust about how far down we have come as a nation. WE ARE FUCKED!

The political establishment has created what they believe is credible verbiage to spew to the American public which would make a reality TV show producer puke.

And as a consequence have in reality provided comedy gold for comedians without them having to even add to the joke because the joke is built into the political bull shit!

Then we as a nation, HELL, as a civilization, have passed over the tipping point!

Now not to get sentimental here but there was a time in America where, THE LIE of who we were, as a country was SOLID BULL SHIT.

Not even questioned! ………. but no more. We have reached, as a nation, the DIARRHEA THRESHOLD and there is no going back to SOLID BULL SHIT.

In fact, the shit can’t even hit the fan because it is running over your shoes!

No, WE HAVE ARRIVED!

 

It is all a big Punch & Judy Show and it’s not even funny, never was really!

Oh sure, there is the sick side of Trump’s “grabbing pussy” and Weiner’s dick bulge sexting but shit most people see it daily on the subway as they step over the homeless.

And the Princess at the ball with Prince charming on her arm just isn’t going to cut it for fucking Hillary & Bill, repulsive both ….. really ….. both of them together don’t equal a 10!

And that poor poor soulless Sarah Huckster Sanders spewing Trump shit right out of her mouth and then licking her lips, reprehensible!

It is pretty sad but her Huckster Bible packing father is at least as wretched as Sarah.
A true family of hypocrisy.

Oh, and sure the Bible tells them to lie. Your know how well Jesus is known for lying, right?

And let Tubularsock NOT go off on domestic and foreign policy because the cast is already fixed into FROZEN BULL SHIT no matter who gets in.

 

Now an important insight that has to become your standard lens to view our current political dialogue is “I’ve never said that” means one has “said that” and “not to my knowledge” means one is knowledgeable on that subject.

These are just commonplace expressions and meanings and are meant to mean exactly what they mean not what they said.

The confusion comes when people take the statement literally. That is not the way it was meant. Why don’t people just know that reverse is forward?

Once you adapt this “new speak” you’ll have a far better understanding of the political environment you are observing.

It is not new, really!

“I am not a crook!” and “I did not fuck that intern” or something like that ……. brings back memories, Tubularsock knows just how much people wish for the “good old days”.

The major difference between yesterday and today is that yesterday ran on 100% lies and today with Trump we have reached 230% lies and rising.

Tubularsock knows some cynic will question the math ……… fucking free thinker!

But in the reality of reality which is illusion you’ll find that President Orange-Tweet, IS ALL FAKE, so whatever he says is fantasy. It is not fake news because just because it IS fake doesn’t make it news.

And the “news” as we know it, is fantasy which is spoon feed to selective groups of the political spectrum …….. yumm!

And that is done to focus the energy of the populous into the trap of “infighting” so while that keeps them busy few realize that their pocket has been picked.

Case in point: The Republican Tax Break for the rich …….. gosh, didn’t see that coming!

Now! Is there a way out?

Well yes there is and it starts with YOU but we haven’t gone down the rabbit hole far enough yet.

And as Tubularsock says:

“When The Mirror
Is In Place
You’ll See
Your Folly.”

 

A KAVANAUGH EXCUSE

 

Well GOD DAMN.

Tubularsock figures that Brett needs ALL the excuses he can get.

Seldom will the political class accept that they may actually be responsible for their own actions.

There is always somebody else to blame!

So as a PUBLIC SERVICE, Tubularsock is offering up this perfect holy idea for Brett to use.

We know that Brett or is it Brat, same difference Tubularsock suspects, has an agenda and won’t be a true legal champion of justice. But who counts anyway.

If the guy drinks booze as much as he drank water at the hearing we may not have to worry about his legal opinions because the fucker will be under the bench most of the time.

And with that even temperament and limited lack of control Kavanaugh displayed he’ll be a perfect example of white privilege shinning right out there in front for all to see.

We already have a black sex pervert on the Supreme Court so why not have a white one.

Another example of American fairness.

And last but not least is that if Brett Kavanaugh is appointed to the Supreme Court of the United States of America then the last of the Three Branches of the Government will truly represent the intellectual and cultural level of Walmart America.

Hell, Tubularsock wants to be in the front of the line for the fall sales!

 

JEFF SESSIONS, GOAT FUCKER?

 

It has been many years now that Tubularsock was wandering Europe. But all of this Naziesque crap being directed by OrangeTurd and his trusty companion BibleThumper Jeff has brought back a long forgotten conversation.

Tubularsock was driving through Germany with a trusted friend. We were taking the “slow” way through the German hinterland and was driving through the Black Forest area with no real destination in mind.

The evergreen forests and picturesque villages were right out of a “living” traveler guidebook. An amazing area of Germany to visit especially if you are a meandering traveler.

It was there, sitting in the car at a pullout that our conversation began. If we had been German citizens during the rise of Hitler and if we had been living in this area of German, just how knowledgeable would we have been about Auschwitz in Poland and what was happening in Germany at large as well?

As the hate and fear was propagated that “others” were not worthy of our concern just how shutdown to this oncoming evil would we have grokked?

Tubularsock has many German friends that have stated that their parent’s generation, after the war, would NOT EVEN discuss this subject or explain how they had been duped by Hitler and his hate filled belief system. The shame was too great and they didn’t want to explain their role of even being citizens in that mess.

Jump to Jeff Session interpreting the Bible, Romans 13 suggesting that God supports the government in separating immigrant parents from their children.

 

And it looks to Tubularsock that Jeff has as much knowledge as Tubularsock has about Biblical interpretation when Tubularsock interprets Isaiah 11:6 “. . . the leopard will lie down with the goat . . .” to mean that Jeff Sessions fucks goats!

Now, Tubularsock may not be the best Biblical scholar, however, it just goes to show you that Jeff too is rather selective at cherry picking passages of the Bible for his own political purposes. Shame on you Jeff, you old goat fucker!

 

And then we have Plastic Melania in her “I Don’t Care, Do U” coat going off to see the children in jail to bestow her “motherly love” with her magic wand.

Leaving Barron home alone with his unstable Orange-“father”.

Poor, Poor Barron, assumed to have been born from a turkey baster impregnation so Plastic Mom didn’t have to have that gross Fat-Orange-Body thrusting and panting attempting to get a hard on to do the job.

 

FREE BARRON!, FREE BARRON!, FREE BARRON!

 

Wow, speaking of child molestation! Can you imagine having to be trapped in a “family” with Donald Jr., Ivanka, and Eric!

Tiffany is not so bad.

But leave it to Peter Fonda to hit the nail on the head with his tweet calling for Barron to be “. . . ripped from his mother’s arms and put in a cage with pedophiles.”

Of course, Peter apologized later saying he had been upset over Trump’s Policy and he had “. . . tweeted something highly inappropriate and vulgar about the president and his family in response to the devastating images I was seeing on television.”

OH CONTRAIR!

The pedophile part WAS a little bit over the top but at least the cage would help protect Barron from Plastic-mom, Orange-dad, and the evil Munchkins!

But unlike the children stolen from their parents at the border Plastic-mom had the U.S. Secret Service notified. Some kids warrant special attention.

 

FREE BARRON!, FREE BARRON!, FREE BARRON!

 

So Plastic-I-Don’t-Care wanted to see for herself what was happening to the imprisoned children of Latin American descent so, if you can believe this, she was sent to a facility opened to the first lady which was, of course, selected keeping in mind the press would be accompanying her.

“Other such facilities around the country have denied access to Democratic lawmakers and media”.

You know, like any good DEMOCRATIC society would do. Prevent Congress from representing the people they are supposed to represent and be the eyes of the people. Republicans are prevented as well. You know, to keep it fair.

Well, it sure fooled Plastic I-Don’t-Care!

Tubularsock is sure that everyone was on best behavior for the Plastic-Lady! She thanked everyone for a job well done and then got into her jet and flew back to Washington, D.C.

She left with her parting words that the U.S. should “govern with heart”!

And Tubularsock agrees and just maybe it has come time to pull that used heart of Dick Cheney and plant it into Donald. That heart never seemed to work for Cheney anyway.

The Nazi mind set is running again and the American public can be awakened to the possible further destruction of what is left of American Values which weren’t that strong to begin with or we can watch the edges of the toilet bowl as we all swirl down into the depth of the Black Forest never to be seen again.

 

It actually is up to US!

Trump has embarrassed the United States of America in the World and as his Scottish-born mother’s relatives have stated: “His Mother had been acutely embarrassed by the antics of her fourth child during the 1990s when his failing marriage and business were the subject of intense tabloid scrutiny.

Mary Trump died in 2000, but if his mother was upset with his crap in the 1990’s she must be turning over in her grave NOW!

And as for dear daddy, Fred C. Trump with his German ancestry as a nap-sack was arrested at a Ku Klux Klan riot in New York in 1927, records reveal. He died in 1999.

 

Need Tubularsock say more? The racist apple hasn’t fallen far from the tree, now has it!

 

KOREAN CRIP ALLOWED INTO TRUMP COUNTRY?

 

If you hadn’t noticed a crippled Korean was allowed into the State of the Union address even though he was a former NORTH KOREAN.

Tubularsock thought we had a WALL to protect us from the “evils” of North Korea!

Come to find out the entire Congress are in favor of North Korean cripples. Or at least it appeared that way with all of them standing up and applauding. Damn!

Now don’t you worry ……. it wasn’t real, it was a sympathetic ploy for war and we ALL can stand united for that! Right?

It is just part of the old “North Korea is so brutal to THEIR OWN CITIZENS” that WE (AMERICA) must “protect” Koreans by bombing them back to the stone age in order to save them from their own evil government.

In a lot of ways it is Trump’s new campaign:

“MAKE MORE KOREANS CRIPPLED AGAIN”.

(Oh sure, Tubularsock has made hats!)

But this isn’t even that creative. It’s the old Iraq weapons of mass distraction ploy. Will Americans be fooled again ….. SO SOON?

Because the words have already been used pushing exactly the same bull shit. It is just OrangeFuck mouthing them.

Flash back to DumbFuckShrub, remember how Shrub explained that the Saddam Hussein regime “. . . ha(d) already used poison gas to murder thousands of its own citizens . . .”? (Of course after the Reagan Administration sold them the chemicals, you know for “farm” use.)

You see, this kind of imagery is the stepping stones to preparing the American citizens for another WAR to save humanity.

After all, we have to attack them there rather than have them right here in OUR HOMELAND!

 

Remember how this works?

But really, it’s too late!

“OUR”(?) President has already LET IN a North Korean Crip! They are already here!

But as President Dump put it, “North Korea’s reckless pursuit of nuclear missiles could very soon threaten our homeland . . .” He left out the classic line “in the shape of a mushroom cloud” that the Shrub Team used so effectively. Too bad.

And those North Koreans have AT LEAST one or two nukes compared to the U.S. nuclear arsenal which if placed end to end would reach to Mars and back BUT IT IS those North Koreans that are dangerous!

Hell somebody might REALLY USE THEM on civilians!

Oh, yeah ……. we already have …….. twice!

So why is Tubularsock supposed to be scared again?

Well, there IS A REASON TO BE SCARED …………………

President OrangeTweet picked Dr. Victor Cha for nomination as the U.S. Ambassador to South Korea.

Cha was vetted and has been approved by South Korea as well. Cha is a very capable and knowledgeable choice to be Ambassador and as American Ambassadors go maybe overqualified if there is such a thing.

So for OrangeTweet to pick him was a surprise to Tubularsock.

BUT as the world turns …….. a few days ago Cha was pulled from the list by the Trump Administration.

WHY? Sure you asked!

Because in private Dr. Victor Cha expressed concerns about a military strike approach to North Korea!

Well good bye, Victor!

It appears that the Trump Administration believes that a “bloody nose” strategy on North Korea is all that it will take to keep North Korea in line.

And the “bloody nose” strategy goes like this:

If in the future North Korea does a missile test or other provocative act the American response would be a carefully targeted attack on a North Korean military facility. But this is exactly why North Korea wants nuclear weapons! North Korea doesn’t want to be Syria or Iraq where the U.S. can bomb anytime it gets upset!. No, with nuclear weapons …….. the warmongering Americans have to think twice.

HAVING nuclear weapons keeps from being attacked at the whim of the U.S.! What is so difficult to understand here?

Now if one reverses this Trump-esque insanity:

If the U.S. happened to do something that North Korea took as a provocative act and North Korea responded by “carefully targeting” a U.S. ship to show their disapproval, just what do you think the U.S.response would be?

Yep!

So, how can it be assumed that an irrational Kim Jong-un, as he is portrayed, would take it all in stride and not assume that this “selected rational limited attack” wasn’t a full out attack and in response start a war that kills hundreds of thousands of North and South Korean civilians and large numbers of US troops in a matter of hours?

AND THE ENVELOPE PLEASE ……………….

BOOOOOOOOM!

 

PRESENT AT THE CREATION

Tubularsock was sitting in his Corner Office In His Underground Bunker Overlooking Washington, D.C. from Oakland, CA. (see BUNKER TOUR for background) and pondering the absurd world we find ourselves.

But hey, what in the fuck would you expect if in each last election you had to vote for the “lessor of the two evils”!

 

 

It is just logical that in time you’d have to reach the bottom of the barrel, RIGHT?

And the real scary thing is that Orange Fuck and his deranged offspring and his third plastic wife may not be at the bottom.

Think about it! Makes WW3 look better already, doesn’t it!

 

 

So is there a way out?

So kick back and think of your options.

Sure Tubularsock has some options to suggest.

And remember these are only for fun, not real change.

 

 

First: We grab Pussy-Whipped-Session’s and give him a marijuana suppository to loosen up his dysfunctional brain and bring him into the 21st century!

Second: We remove the Christian Cross turned sideways from Pence’s ass to relieve the pressure on his brain as he waits for the second coming.

And Third ……. oh hell you come up with one! After all isn’t that what democracy is all about?