Posted: January 2, 2014 in Uncategorized

Tube Fed Bull Heading

Well Tubularsock went out today and bought waders for 2014.

Now you may be wondering why Tubularsock, who works from his top floor corner office in his underground bunker from Oakland, CA overlooking Washington, D.C., would need waders, a waterproof garment for the legs and body, used esp. by anglers when fishing OR by anyone who realizes just how “fishy” the social/political/economic system that we live in can be. So in preparation for the 2014 BULLSHIT onslaught that will be stacking up it is simply prudent to acquire a pair. Trust me, you’ll be glad you did!

Last week Tubularsock was standing at the bus stop (not in his waders by the way) and a guy sitting on the bus-bench said aloud, “It’s just fucked!”

Because Tubularsock was the only other living person standing there at the bus stop it had to be determine whether the guy was on a cell …….. which he was not …….. or talking to me or himself. Because in general Tubularsock was in agreement with this universal statement it seemed safe to agree with this stranger at the bus stop so I said, “You fucking can say that again”.

From that point on this guy started with a barrage of information and opinion like he was talking to Snowden rather than Tubularsock. Come to find out he worked in a cubicle farm in San Francisco on the 45th floor and he was an economic analyst. In fact he had been doing what he called future strategies for over forty years and this was his third bank he had worked for after leaving university.

He also made it clear that his expertise was not always called future strategies. Not that I asked or anything.

He actually had his own office in the cubicle farm and was the manager over eighteen analysts specializing in future strategies for his employer.

He said that for the normal guy investing in the stock market in 2014-15 would be bettered served going to Vegas with a 20% chance of winning than investing in the rigged stock market.

I had no argument there so I didn’t interrupt. He said the banks were sitting on trillions of dollars and because of being flush they were once again investing in quick profit derivatives all over again. As well as other high risk investments.

His team had written up the dangers of the policies being used but “management”,as he called them, made a hell of a lot in year-end-bonuses by doing risky business. And he felt that they had been embolden by the lack of anyone having to take responsibility in the last go around.

He was finishing up his last year before retirement and he was really frustrated with no one caring and not listening. He was also a bit tipsy like he might have started off the day with scotch instead of milk on his cheerios. But I’m not entirely sure.

As we left the transbay terminal he said it had been nice talking to me and disappeared into the throng of worker bees swarming down Montgomery Street.

 Now what he had said wasn’t much different than what I had read over the last several months but having it come from a real living person was somehow more profound.

Now Tubularsock is rather a perceptive economic analyst himself. In research in UpTown Oakland I have noticed that a glass of Chardonnay that I was paying $4 a glass in 2011 is being sold for $10 a glass today. And to make matters worse a large hot saki is running for $15 rather than $6. Now do I need an economics degree to say that things are getting rough?

Don’t despair, Tubularsock will continue his research and keep you posted on the price of this essential food source and report back to you or go broke trying. Anything for raw research don’t you know!

Now why did banks have a boom year in 2013? And why are the bonuses for bankers skyrocketing?

Easy answer ….. The Quantitative Easing Scheme.

You see in order to stimulate the economy the Fed would in the past just buy and sell government bonds in order to keep the interbank interest rates at a specified target value. But for some time now the interbank interest rates have be set at 0% so that policy isn’t working any longer.

So enter the unconventional monetary policy ……. Quantitative Easing.

Now The Quantitative Easing Scheme is done by purchasing assets of longer maturity than short-term government bonds. The goal of this policy is to increase the money supply rather than to decrease the interest rate, which cannot be decreased further because 0 is 0!

Just like the magic show in Las Vegas the balls stay in the air because it’s called “magic” but when the lights go down so do the balls. Many predict that the balls are going to fall in 2014.

 Quantitative Easing is often considered a last resort to stimulate the economy.

Well it reminds Tubularsock of the time when he was watching his uncle act like the big spender by fronting his good-for-nothing-loafer friends for drinks at the night club bar. When the bill came due guess who got left holding the debt?

Yep, Uncle Sam …….. remember that’s YOU & ME!

And don’t you forget it!

But not to worry. Another use for waders is keeping your feet from being stained while crushing your own grapes for a glass of Chardonnay. As Tubularsock always has said, “necessity is the mother of invention”. And I call THAT …… good news!

And Tubularsock will drink to that!

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  1. Damn! It’s deep in here! I need a pair of WADERS!!! Where’s muh waders??!! I got two dollars! Waders over here please!!

    Seriously, I have been shouting to all and sundry that the shit ain’t even begun to hit the fan yet. When the shit crashes and burns, it is going to make the Great Depression pale by comparison. When this ‘house of cards’ falls, it’s gonna fall hard and the signs are everywhere. But of course, you couldn’t tell that by looking at all the fools who rushed out over the holidays to trample each other over a goddamn TV. And in the words of Sir Isaac Newton, “what goes up must come down!” Are people seriously thinking that the stock market is going to continue to be ‘bullish’. All fantasies, no matter how fantastic must come to an end. Speculation as a game is fine, but not when it leads to having to get bailed out by taxpayers who’ve done no wrong. That shit should have been reined in, not encouraged and headed for a bailout out, yet again! Aren’t we supposed to be broke? All I hear is sequestration and deficits and program cuts. Like hell I’d sit calmly by and let that shit get bailed out again while we’re still reeling from their previous criminal shenanigans! I’m not an economist, nor do I know much about derivatives and quantitative easing, but I do know when I smell shit and damn it, I smell shit!!

    I am NOT giving up my only vice, my taste for fine sparkling wine to pay for some more Wall Street hijacking of my taxes, pensions and Social Security!! Nor am I gonna start stomping my own grapes. I’m all for “Vive la Champagne, France, doncha know!”

    Great post, by the way Tube! Glad to see you up on your grape and saki, uh..I mean, game!! But I am NOT stomping grapes to produce some homemade fermented shit.


  2. It sounds like you have the makings of a great sit-com here. The hard part will be working out the climax. Does the guy become homeless and alcoholic, slit his throat or start a new career at MacDonalds?

    I’m glad the two of you didn’t touch on the subject of retirement, or the poor fellow would have offed himself then and there. Sounds like he’s counting on some kind of pension (which his employer will screw him out of – that’s a sure bet) or an IRA (which will be worthless in 5 years – provided the government doesn’t seize it in a “bail in”) to support his retirement. Sounds like he already knows better than to count on Social Security.


    • tubularsock says:

      Wow. Great point stuartbramhall! I never thought of that aspect of my encounter. But Tubularsock has to admit that his story would have been cut short if the guy threw himself in front of the oncoming bus before we had talked. I guess I was just lucky!


      • Seriously though, this ain’t funny. I think that there are going to be many people ‘offing’ themselves because there are those who just cannot stomach poverty. And even now, suicides are on the uptick and it has been stated that this increase in suicides is related to the current jobless slump we’re in. And we all know THAT isn’t going to change for the better, not ever, is my opinion on that!


      • tubularsock says:

        Yes the sad reality is that many will fool themselves into death. That is a sad offshoot for sure. It is just about the last option I would come to.
        A couple of friends awhile back took that option. Both dumb fucks, but now dead dumb fucks! I’ve known being down on my luck but offing myself just doesn’t fit …….. I’d rather be a irritant.


  3. Jeff Nguyen says:

    Great analogy between your free spending uncle and the wolves of wall street (hat tip to Mr. Scorcese). Spending money that doesn’t belong to them on luxury lifestyles most of us can not imagine much less access. The shot callers should all be in steel bracelets and that’s being far kinder than they have been to us, the great unwashed.

    More saki and Chardonnay, please…


    • tubularsock says:

      Thanks for your comment Jeff. Yeah, we great unwashed do have a ways to go to keep up with the Wall Street psychopaths. Tubularsock is waiting for his ship to come in but my fear has always been that they’d want me to break my bottle of Chardonnay or my jar of saki across the bow. And I’ll have none of that foolishness!


  4. Jeff Nguyen says:

    Edit: Pass the saki and Chardonnay please.


  5. Tube, if you’ve read any of my past blog posts, then you will know that I’ve been just about as down and out as anyone could get and I never thought of ‘offing’ myself. It is just not in me to do that. As bad as life gets, I’d rather have 26,000 screaming, cussing fits then ‘do myself in’. Will I ever solve the worlds’ problems? No! But the problems of this world, no matter how large, could never make me commit suicide. It is just not in me to do that. I am not saying that this is the case with everyone, but I do think that those who have been, like I said, about as low as a person can go, are much more likely to get through these hard times than someone who has never had to deal with what many are dealing with now. That is just MY observation.


    • tubularsock says:

      Shelby. I hear what you are saying and I agree. It is a sad state of affairs when people put their pride in front of their life. In our culture we have taught our children that your “stuff “is where your value lies. Rather than YOU, as a person, is all the value you need.

      Thanks for your comment.


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