TUBULARSOCK FAMILY BORDER CROSSING

 

 

In February 2017, Reuters reported that an internal report by the Department of Homeland Security estimated that Trump’s proposed border wall would cost $21.6 billion and take 3.5 years to build. (Oh sure, it’s a little more now in 2019, but who counts?.)

To cut through the border-wall would mean buying a battery operated 20 volt reciprocating saw and about six extra charged batteries as well as the the proper blades and all that would cost one about $530.00, at Home Depot.

Tubularsock would advise one spend an additional $330.00 for a battery 20 volt grinder and 5 grinder wheels to speed your work along.

You know, time is of the essence when crossing a border!

So, Tubularsock calculates that for $860.00 you could cut through one or even two steel-concrete-rebar bollards of Trump’s beautiful border wall and push the cut bollards out of your way and defeat this $21,600,000,000.00 monstrosity and have 21billion, 599million, 999 thousand, 140 dollars and no cents left for breakfast!

Now that’s a deal even at McDonald’s!

And you can go on line and contact: Tubularsock Border Wall Adventure Tours and order up your own vacation adventure for a small no refund down payment.

 

 

Now Tubularsock knows that the standard border cutting crossing is pretty plebeian so lets cross the border the way Tubularsock would do it, OK?

This requires a bit more expense and a bit more deceptive activities but, HEY!, just how often are you going to do it?

PLASTIC EXPLOSIVES!

 

Now this takes a little family planning.

You (family members) place the plastic explosive in three different locations along the wall.

At a given time you “cell phone” the explosive to go off at the extreme location from your planned entry. That will focus a rapid border patrol response.

Then within minutes you “cell phone” the explosion to go off at a 2nd extreme location from your planned entry. That will focus confusion plus a rapid border patrol response.

 

And then you hit the button and blow a hole in the “beautiful wall” at your point of passage.
It is called a diversion entry.

 

 

Come on! THIS COULD BE JUST PLAIN FUN!

OH, DID TUBULARSOCK SAY FUCK THE BORDER PATROL?

Really, it would be only done by Tubularsock to show just how far Trump’s head is up his own ASS!

 

BUT THERE MAY BE AN EASIER SOLUTION TO THIS ENTIRE PROBLEM …………….

 

 

 

Comments
    • tubularsock says:

      Sha’Tara, thank you but are you sure you have the correct Tubularsock. Oh sure, your Christmas present in the mail. Compliments do get you somewhere!

      Cheers.

      Like

      • Sha'Tara says:

        Looking forward to that Christmas present… uh, “Dear Santa, please let Tubularsock know that the very best Christmas present he could send me (and the rest of us) is another one of his inimitable blog posts. Keeping my fingers crossed, thanks, Santa.” Sincerely, Sha’Tara

        Liked by 1 person

      • tubularsock says:

        Sha’Tara, didn’t your mother ever warn you that you should be careful of Fat Old Men that run with elves?

        Like

      • Sha'Tara says:

        No, she didn’t. You see, Santa was the good old bishop, Saint Nicholas, who collected clothes and food for the poor and set out in the dead of winter to save lives. He wasn’t fat and his elves were probably children from the church who gathered the food and clothing and probably helped him to deliver them. Then Crapitalism comes into the story and everything changes. You end up with a jolly old fat fart (compliments of Coca Cola) with elves who make toys and who delivers only to the rich kids, rich parents and rich relatives. I still remember those Christmas cards with a tall man with a staff pulling a sleigh full of stuff through a forest… no reindeer either.

        Liked by 1 person

      • tubularsock says:

        Well, all Tubularsock can say is your mother steered you wrong!

        You’ll now just have to take Tubularsock’s word for it. There is just “something WRONG” with a fat old white Capitalist man dressed up fondling after small elves in the forest.

        Say what you will but if you really stop and picture that, well ………. Ho!, Ho!, Ho! if you get Tubularsock’s drift.

        Like

  1. Wouldn’t a moat full of Trump toupees be enough to scare anyone?

    Liked by 2 people

    • tubularsock says:

      TLA, my my. Now there IS a hairy problem if Tubularsock has ever heard one.

      Just how many orange toupees could fit on a head of pin or rather a pin-head!

      ONLY a hairstylist would know for sure ….. me thinks!

      Like

  2. sojourner says:

    These folks are trying to get into this “shithole” of all “shitholes”, while at the same time, I want out. Go figure!

    Insanity reigns! And now we have a whole pile of impeachment bullshit to go along with the never ending every four year farce, which will be the focus until hell freezes over. This country needs an enema, and I need a frontal lobotomy!

    If this piece of shit government/nation hadn’t been waging continual war on the world, for the last seventy years in particular, then bad-hair-day fuckhead wouldn’t need a wall. But why bother making this point, since no one, on the left, middle or right, is listening?

    PS

    I noted your Anarchism emblem above. Bravo, Tube, even if you didn’t mean it!

    Liked by 1 person

    • tubularsock says:

      Oh sojourner, you are always so happily positive. It is that old “the grass is always better somewhere else” syndrome. And it is way better in Amsterdam, from personal experience.

      But “insanity reigns” now has become our national anthem!

      Come on sojourner sing along:

      “Oh, say can’t you see
      Your frontal Lobotomy’s free

      And the bombs bursting in air
      As hell freezes over the election flare

      Gave proof through the night
      That an enema was in sight

      O’er the land of the free and the home of the brave!”

      Feel better, sojourner?

      Oh, Tubularsock did think of you when he was working on the Anarchism emblem, for real!

      Now let’s hold hands and sing a rousing round of Kumbaya!

      Peace bro!

      Liked by 1 person

  3. Sluggo says:

    genial, como siempre!
    Esto es genial, mi amigo!
    Iré a tu país mañana.
    Trump es un coño
    Tu amigo, Sluggo

    Liked by 1 person

    • Sha'Tara says:

      translation for “coño” says “pussy” I think you mean “cunt” yeah? (con in French)

      Liked by 1 person

      • tubularsock says:

        Sha’Tara, from Tubularsock’s limited understanding of Spanish “coño” is noun which means pussy, cunt, hell as well as dammit. Depending the way it is used.

        Either way, Tubularsock recommends a condom to be on the safe side.

        In this application one places it over the tongue or that was what Tubularsock’s language instructor said to do. Asqueroso!

        Like

      • Sha'Tara says:

        I was comparing “coño” with “con” in French or “couillon” and trying to find the best fit definition. Spanish is my third language – the one I never learned. Breton is my fourth – the one I was born into and also never learned. I’ve majored in a lot of never learned disciplines in my day. It doesn’t make me exceptional but it makes for interesting inner dialogue. Buenas noches, señor Tube.

        Liked by 1 person

      • Sha'Tara says:

        You must have really hated your language instructor to call him an asqueroso…

        Liked by 1 person

      • tubularsock says:

        Now, now Sha’Tara don’t get too upset over Tubularsock’s relationship with Tubularsock’s language instructor.

        Wouldn’t your assumption that Tubularsock’s language instructor was a male be a little sexist?

        In truth, but don’t tell anyone …….. Tubularsock can no longer remember ANY of Tubularsock’s language instructors. Tal vez, muy estúpido, ¿sí?

        Like

      • tubularsock says:

        OMG! Sorry, but Tubularsock became distracted by your juxtaposition of “coño” and “con” “. . . and trying to find the best fit”!

        Tubularsock is easily distracted.

        Like

    • tubularsock says:

      Gracias amigo. Disfruta de tu viaje. Trump es un ignorante “Ugly American” descerebrado!

      Gracias por su comentario.

      Like

  4. I think the narcotics smugglers have beat you to it, Tube: https://www.stripes.com/news/americas/smugglers-are-sawing-through-new-sections-of-us-border-wall-1.605701

    You need to be careful not to infringe on their market. They’re not very nice people (worse than the CIA actually).

    Liked by 1 person

    • tubularsock says:

      Well DrB, Tubularsock will be careful. And you are correct that they are a mean lot but “worse than the CIA”?

      Tubularsock thinks not. In fact, with a closer look one would find that they may be one and the same……… hmmmm.

      But thanks for the link. After reading it, Tubularsock thought up a couple of new ideas to create more mayhem at the border with a limited budget than he had previously come up with…….. Oh may, idle hands ………….

      Like

  5. Sha'Tara says:

    I hope Tubularsock is going to post his new ideas… fingers crossed…

    Liked by 1 person

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