Posts Tagged ‘DONALD TRUMP’

TRUMP’S DUMP ON THE DUMB

You know OrangeTweet is pretty consistent in his ability to leave a highway of failure in his wake.

He is like “a hundred-per-center” in the inability to do anything but fail.

The most recent example (well Tubularsock hasn’t seen the news in the last three seconds so recent is relative with the Orange-Dumpster’s crap)

But lets use the “Imbecile-In-Chief’s” firing of Kirstjen Nielsen, the secretary of Homeland Security.

That move has made an impression because due to OrangeTweet’s actions, the Department of Homeland Security “. . . is now without a secretary, deputy secretary, ICE director, FEMA director, Secret Service director, inspector general, undersecretary for policy, undersecretary for science and technology, chief financial officer and chief privacy officer,” (Dianne Feinstein 4/8/19)

 

 

 

 

Now compare that to OrangeTweet’s former business failures:

Trump Hotels & Casinos Resorts

Trump Castle

Trump Plaza

Trump Taj Mahal

Donald J. Trump Foundation

Trump University

Trump Airlines

Trump Steaks

Trump Vodka

Trump Model Management

 

Do you note a pattern here?

And then you add the Trump narrative repeated ad nauseam claiming,

“I built what I built myself, and I did it by working long hours and working hard and working smart.”

And his followers believe it.

Now Tubularsock asks you …….. who are the dummies?

 

 

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IT’S NUTS – REST IN PEACE

You know, there is nothing new about knowing that the world we live in is BAT SHIT CRAZY.

It really amazes Tubularsock that we as a species has survived this long. And sure, Tubularsock isn’t expecting it to last much longer because once the bees and the butterflies go under the only pollination that will take place is humans pissing on plastic flowers and proclaiming that it’s working!

Oh well.

We listen to Fuckless-Orange-Dump tell us that Kim Jong Un had nothing to do with the torture and death of Otto Warmbier and that Saudi Crown Prince Mohammed bin Salman did not order the chopping up of journalist Jamal Khashoggi.

Fuckless-Orange-Dump IS REALLY that stupid!

But that doesn’t really tell you just how low this all can go. You’d better be seated for this one!

World’s Top Bridge Player Flunks Drug Test

Geir Helgemo, the No. 1 bridge player in the world, has been suspended after failing a drug test at a tournament in Orlando last fall.

What the fuck?

Yep, somebody has the job of testing card players for drug use. And the drugs found were NOT “. . . performance enhancing in bridge.”

So why?

Because the Bridge Federation belongs to the International Olympic Committee and adheres to World Anti-Doping Agency rules.

AND RULES ARE RULES even if they don’t apply to the circumstances!

Seems strange to Tubularsock that when it comes to torture and murder, which do break some laws themselves, they are held to a lower “legal” standard than Bridge and unlike Bridge the level of compliance is just a bit lax.

But Bridge competition is well protected! Feel safer?

And rest assured that insanity in an insane world is “normal”.

Rest in peace.

TRUMP NOWHERE WALL— END OF THE LINE

 

Here’s a question for you America First Lovers. As OrangeTweet continues to promote a useless and limited wall to nowhere, Russia, India and Iran are working toward a 7,200-km long lane mixing sea and rail routes essentially linking the Indian Ocean with the Persian Gulf through Iran and Russia and further on down the road, to Europe.

The Japanese are looking toward a revamped Trans-Siberian Railway to improve trade connections with Russia and China. This too will help tie North and South Korea and Vietnam into closer economic ties as well.

There is no invasion here. No military attacks on sovereign countries or military bases being forced on any of them from the outside.

Just maybe that American Imperialism isn’t looking so good and the fact that we are losing on every front may mean that the U.S. is doing something drastically WRONG!

You know, if you really have something beneficial to offer, people will gravitate toward it. Not fight it. They’ll steal it!

Interesting that China and Russia are putting huge sums of money into infrastructure while we keep dumping huge sums of money into military exploits.

And on top of that the “best” plan is an ego-wall for the emperor!

The times have reversed …….. the end of the Han Dynasty in America?

THE WALL AND THE EMPEROR HAS NO CLOTHES SO GIVE HIM A HAT!

 

Tubularsock has been busy with planning the New Trump Wall that isn’t and therein lies the beauty.

You see a show down is really a waste of time and to carry it on is just boring to we political junkies.

So here is a foolproof plan and the cost is negligible.

You see Trump himself has solved the problem and all it will take is for the Democrats to accept the solution and even praise Donnie for his brilliance. Ok, that my be overstating the outcome but Tubularsock’s plan IS brilliant, foolproof, and fact free!

 

Donnie, regardless of reality, has been repeating that his Wall is being worked on and will be completed right now.

He has stated that he will not wait for committees to work through all this mess and that he is having the wall built NOW.

(an aside: in the real world NOTHING has been done at the border except some fence repair but with the exception of a few hundred thousand dollars for several prototypes of possible wall types NOTHING has been done. Or a clearer way of saying this, NOTHING HAS BEEN DONE IN TERMS OF WALL BUILDING AT THE BORDER, NOTHING!)

So Donnie keeps saying that the wall IS BEING BUILT right now but there IS NO WALL.

Enough already!

The Tubularsock Solution (and don’t thank me now):

The Democrats proclaim that the Trump Wall has been completed.

Trump will praise himself that he has accomplished the impossible and that NO OTHER president in the history of the United States has EVER completed such a BIGLY wall!

The Trumpites will BELIEVE because they lack intelligence and FOX will praise Trump’s fortitude. And really, who ever goes to the the border anyway? So it’s all good.

And everything is safe and sane in Mudville.

Mission Accomplished. If you accept this mission proceed. This message will self destruct in five seconds. Good luck.

 

TRUMP & SANTA 2018

HALT, the bull shit train!

Every year for decades now NORAD, the North American Aerospace Defense Command, has followed Santa Claus on Christmas Eve as he zips around the world dropping down chimneys delivering presents to GOOD little girls and boys.

Sure he does.

NORAD’s aerospace control includes ensuring air sovereignty and air defense of the airspace of Canada and the United States and is on duty 24/7 three hundred and sixty five days a year EXCEPT September 11, 2001. But hey, who’s counting?

Children are encouraged to call NORAD for information of the location of Santa Claus at any given moment to be told if he’s on track.

And some years some children’s calls are diverted so they also can speak to the President or the First Lady as a political PR stunt.

Michelle Obama answered children’s calls for several years while being First Lady.

And so it goes ………. Melania performed her PR duty just like Michelle and all was well in Christmas land.

And then President Orange-Scrooge took some calls this year as well.

But first he had to close down the government …… HO, HO, HO!

You know, President Orange-Scrooge doesn’t seem to do ANYTHING correctly. Do you know what Tubularsock means?

No?

 

Well let Tubularsock give you this example:

President Orange-Scrooge took a call from a 7 year old child and during the course of the conversation the question of Believing In Santa Claus came up. The child’s response was “yes sir” indicating a belief in the jolly old Claus, when President Orange-Scrooge proceeded with “. . . at 7, it’s marginal, right?”

Now the child didn’t know what marginal meant or what the reference meant so all was good in Christmas land.

But REALLY, a guy who lies ALL THE TIME chooses at that moment to start to “tell the truth” about the existence of Santa Claus …….. REALLY?

Yet there is a much larger point Tubularsock wants you to consider.

And that is the Santa Claus LIE. That should give you pause.

Your parents LIE to you that Santa Claus is REAL!

You can call up your government on a special phone line and be told Santa Claus is REAL!

And think on this ………. THE GOVERNMENT tracks Santa just like they track YOU and that is REAL.

And the President and First Lady tells you Santa Claus is REAL!

AND YOU BELIEVE …………..

So when the times comes when you are told by your parents, your government, and your President and First Lady that Santa Claus is “AN ENEMMY COMBATANT” or an ISIS infiltrator or terrorist sympathizer will you believe THAT as well?

Sure you will!

That is how we got into the Vietnam War, and Afghanistan, Iraq, Syria, and Yemen!
And the citizen’s believed ……….. and that same Santa Lie continues today.

So it would do us all good if President Orange-Scrooge received a huge chunk of “clean-coal” in his Christmas stocking this year.

Maybe he will, if Santa Mueller has anything to say about it!

But unfortunately, OrangeTweet isn’t the only Santa liar out there!

 

THE GOOD OLD DAYS OF 2018

 

Well a fucking HO-HO-HO to everyone.

Another year is closing and world peace and goodwill toward men is headed for the exit.

The Government is shut down.

The Stock Market is headed toward the depths of hell.

The Congress is not willing to throw 5 billion on blocks to build “The Wall”.

The Orange-Child is kicking, pouting, and tweeting about …. whatever.

And it is business as usual in good old Amerikkka.

For Tubularsock it is that happy time of year when total strangers yell out “Merry Christmas”, or the much more PC, “Happy Holidays” to you.

Of course, Tubularsock yells back …… “Same to ya fella, and so’s your mother.”

 

And Tubularsock’s favorite Christmas past time, sitting on a bench and watching people ladened with gaily colorful packages stepping over the homeless in order to get home with their happy treasures to share in Christmas cheer BEFORE the credit card bills arrive.

 

Well hell, they gave 20 bucks to a food bank what else can one do?

So with total optimism Tubularsock faces 2019 because we can all hope that it can get worse which then will make all this current shit become, “The Good Old Days”!

 

TRUMP: THE TURKEY REFLECTION

 

Now tell Tubularsock, just what in the fuck is the President of the United States of America taking the time to “PARDON A TURKEY”?

Well, it makes perfect sense.

It is a perfect extension of American policy. What we do in reality is ALWAYS the opposite of what we say we are doing! Get it yet?

We support the concept of Democracy for the People of the world by supporting, arming, training any dictatorial regime that will support U.S. imperialism. EVEN IF WE have to overthrow a democratically elected government voted in by the people if it doesn’t conform to American hegemony!

Our national leader pardon’s ONE Turkey and then we as a nation go out and have 46 million turkeys slaughtered to eat on one day EVERY YEAR!

Eighty-eight per cent of American families surveyed by the National Turkey Federation eat turkey at Thanksgiving.

 

Which bring us right to the National Turkey Federation. Tubularsock bets you never knew we had one, now did you?

Yep, we sure do and it is an international non-profit organization whose mission is ‘the conservation of the wild turkey and the preservation of our hunting heritage” to kill wild turkeys. Wow, another loyal corporate lobbying group pushing ahead for managing the kill.

Pretty much like Boeing, Lockheed Martin and BAE Systems for people killing. Sautéed in a French wine sauce and it almost brings our taste buds back to our colonial past.

JUST LIKE THANKSGIVING!

But you really have to ponder, just a little bit, don’t let it get in the way of the leftovers ad nauseam.

Just how culturally programed are we? FUCKING, LIKE TOTALITY!

Here is how, and it will show you that most people BELIEVE ANYTHING if it is packaged right and repeated long enough. (WOULD YOU like to name a president that hasn’t used that technique?)

National Thanksgiving Turkey Presentation is a ceremony that takes place at the White House every year shortly before Thanksgiving. It dates back to the 1940’s as a lobbying technique to promote turkey sales. For a while it was a joint lobbying and marketing tool for the egg and poultry industry as well but that ended and the turkey trot won out.

It wasn’t until 1989 that the concept of “pardon” took hold and caught on to this day. Interesting that the CIA President Daddy Bush was the President to start that tradition.

But still what is lost in this entire scam is the only “tradition” in any of this is turkey sales!

Capitalism at its best ……. NO MEANING, JUST MONEY!

An important moral side note for those that have any morality left in this society:

Benjamin Franklin, who proposed the turkey as the official United States’ bird, was dismayed when the bald eagle was chosen over the turkey.

“Franklin wrote to his daughter, referring to the eagle’s “bad moral character,” saying, “I wish the bald eagle had not been chosen as the representative of our country!

The turkey is a much more respectable bird, and withal a true original native of America.”

Just goes to show you that the birds you hang with corrupt your vision. Tubularsock believes your mother told you the same thing about your friends. Right?