Kim Kardashian | Tubularsock

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OIL: SLIP SLIDING AWAY!

Posted: November 19, 2014 in Assad, CHEVRON, Climate, Climate Summit 2014, Crimea, Drones, Economy, EMPOLYMENT, Iran, John Kerry, Keystone XL, Kim Kardashian, Neo-Nazi, Obama, Oil, Russia, SYRIA, Ukraine, Vladimir Putin, XL Pipeline
Tags: barack obama, Big Oil, Keystone XL pipeline, middle-east, Obama foreign policy, Putin, Russia, Syria

OIL: SLIP SLIDING AWAY!

Have you noticed that gas prices are down? Wonder why? Did you also notice in this last election cycle that that wasn’t even mentioned by the Democrats as an indicator of how well the Party’s President was doing? Wonder why?

And the biggest surprise is the gas prices came down EVEN WITHOUT the XL pipeline being approved! So much for that stupid argument which was stupid only because the shit oil being pumped out of Canada is for export only and has NOTHING to do with oil prices within the United States.

So what gives America?

Now Tubularsock put on his oily rubber boots with the American flag embossed on each boot and stepped right into the middle of the ooze. And here is what was discovered.

Never say Tubularsock is not willing to ooze the extra mile for your knowledge ………

You see in early November Saudi Arabia lowered its oil price per barrel.

Wow. What a nice surprise. And just in time for Christmas too.

You know how those Moslems love Christians.

Now some say that the Saudis did this because by lowering the world oil prices it would fuck up the Assad Government in Syria and put pressure on Iran as well.

And some say that the Saudis are trying to put pressure on North Dakota and it’s shale oil costs. That reasoning goes like this; the cost of extracting shale oil is expensive as opposed to just pumping it out of the ground in the Saudi’s established oil fields.

Driving the oil price down may force some smaller oil shale producers to slow production because they can’t recoup costs when oil on the commodity market hits below $80 a barrel.

And then some say that the Saudis lowered the price of crude to fuck up Putin and the Ukraine mess. Russia helps to balance its budget by selling oil. If the price goes down it puts the pressure on the Russian economy and the U.S. imposed sanctions put a bigger squeeze on the Russians.

Now the Saudis say that their influence is not as powerful as it once was and the world supply and demand has caused this dip in crude oil prices.

So Saudi Arabia dumping oil into the market is to just to get a competitive edge. Hmmm.

Just after Crimea voted to rejoin Russia Obummer happened to just drop in on Riyadh. You know, like gosh I was just in the neighborhood and thought we’d have a meeting.

“Leonid Fedun, a co-owner of the private oil firm Lukoil, cited President Barack Obama’s visit to Riyadh in March. “Obama travelled to meet the king of Saudi Arabia just after the Crimea events to push him to these actions (to lower the oil price),” Fedun, whose firm has large U.S. assets, said last month.” (Reuters)

New York Times columnist Thomas Friedman, wrote last month, “Is it just my imagination or is there a global oil war underway pitting the United States and Saudi Arabia on one side against Russia and Iran on the other?”

Tubularsock wouldn’t be surprised. Of course it must be just another one of those conspiracy theories.

In September U.S. Secretary of State John Kerry made a trip to Saudi Arabia because he was just passing through town. “When asked if his discussions had touched on Russia’s need for oil above $100 to balance its budget, he smiled and said: “They (Saudis) are very, very well aware of their ability to have an impact on global oil prices.”(Reuters)

But for Tubularsock the most logical explanation, the one that seems most reasonable is that Saudi Arabia has DECLARED WAR on North Dakota!

And the question which remains is are we as Americans going to just sit back and let this happen OR do we do what we do best …….. send in HUMANITARIAN TROOPS and bomb and drone and destroy North Dakota in order to save democracy!

The answer is really up to YOU America!

Oh well, there may be another thing for Americans to take a look at. Just maybe the price of gasoline can be manipulated by ahhh ……. somebody.

Usually the price of gas goes up and up and up when there is trouble in the Middle East but since there is no trouble in the Middle East the price of gasoline has gone down.

Funny how that works.

SAME OL’ SHIT

Posted: November 17, 2014 in 2016 Presidential Election, Climate, Diane Feinstein, Kim Kardashian, Lame Duck, Obama, Oil, TED CRUZ, VOTE, XL Pipeline
Tags: barack obama, Big Oil, Diane Feinstein, Keystone XL pipeline

Now that the dust has cleared ……….

Bull shit. There wasn’t any dust. One of the parties won over another party for control of Congress but the assholes that still go to Congress to recess themselves from doing anything like make decisions about ahh, what in the fuck do they make decisions about anyway? Oh yeah, Thanksgiving and Christmas recess.

But rest assured they’ll be back in force sometime after the first of the new year ……..

They pontificate a lot …….. actually it’s their way of farting. Seriously, Tubularsock is just pointing this out to you so the next time you see Mitch or Harry, John, Rand and Diane open up their mouths to the nightly news cameras think FART. It will make much more sense to you.

It’s their contribution to natural gas. And because it’s on TV you don’t have to smell it!

Now the real fun has already began. The XL pipeline. A long time ago Tubularsock prophesied that Obummer would pass that damn pipe into existence and here it comes.

Oh sure he could veto it but they will tie the bill in with, oh I don’t know, the money needed to save the Middle East and oh gosh his back will be up against the wall.

Like sure it will be.

And we’ll hear the agony of the pen scratching his signature across the bill and the seven feet left to complete that ecological disaster will be completed.

And that will be the last you’ll hear of it until the first 15 million barrels leak into the waterways of America. And we’ll hear from Congress and a new President how just NO ONE could have thought that this tragedy could have ever happened from a pipe!

You know the drill. Then we will hear how the government will put “the full force” of our National Governmental Disaster Preparedness into action.

Then the complete failure of that idea …………

And then Congress will take it upon themselves to call a committee, oops ……… multiple committees on what went wrong and how we can prevent it happening again until the next time!

You know one of the biggest, saddest things for Tubularsock on September 11, 2001 is that ……. if only a full session of Congress would had been in session and the Shanksville Plane United flight 93 had crashed into the Capitol Building rather than a field in Pennsylvania.

To this day Tubularsock resents the false-flag planners for fucking that up!

Oh well. Tubularsock has been disappointed before.

All we have to get excited about now is 2016 when Hillary and Jeb go toe to toe for the big prize. Hey, it will go to Hillary. That’s the deal already made. You’ll see.

But there will be a dark horse candidate in that race and Tubularsock has the inside information but can’t release it at this time ………..

MITIGATING EVIL

Posted: October 17, 2014 in Abu Bakr Al-Bagdadi, Afghanistan, Assad, Bagdad, Bandar bin Sultan, boots on the ground, Bull Shit, CHEMICAL WEAPONS, CIA TERRORISTS, Diane Feinstein, Dick Cheney, Don Rumfeld, Drones, economics, FBI TERRORISTS, Guantanamo, Iran, IRAQ, ISIS, ISRAEL, James Clapper, Justin Bieber, Kim Kardashian, Neo-Nazi, NSA, Obama, Oil, Russia, Russia-Syria Chemicals, SYRIA, TERRORISTS CREATED BY U.S., The Matrix, torture, Ukraine
Tags: al Qaeda, barack obama, CIA, Dick Cheney, drones, global arms trade, Human Rights American Failure, Kim Kardashian, middle-east, Putin, Russia, Syria, terrorism, Ukraine

You know Tubularsock has been thinking about ISIS because Tubularsock doesn’t know what action is the patriotic thing to do.

Too much thinking CAN spoil the broth.

ISIS on the one hand is the evil of all evils. Or is that Dick Cheney? God! I get them so confused. ISIS on the other hand is the creation of the US, UK, and Israeli intelligence apparatus or at least that is what has been revealed by the leaked NSA documents by Edward Snowden. (Thanks Ed.)

The US, UK, and Israeli intelligence apparatus created a strategy known as the hornet’s nest in order to attract the fundamentalists from around the world to Syria to overthrow Assad’s Government.

Now does Tubularsock support ISIS because America created them or does Tubularsock not support ISIS because they are the most evil of evils, except for Dick Cheney? What would a real patriot do?

You see the U.S. wants a U.S.-friendly government in Syria. You know like a puppet government that would not cooperate with Iran and block the oil pipeline that is being built. If the Assad government had gone along with the U.S. and did their bidding then Syria would be classified as a wonderful world government. You know like Israel, Saudi Arabia, Qatar, and Kuwait all with police state governments. But that works for the United States much like the newly American created neo-nazi government now in the Ukraine.

The United States support of oppressive governments is done because it’s GOOD FOR BUSINESS but the mantra has always been that we are doing this to BRING DEMOCRACY to the people.

You guessed it ……. the mantra, in truth, goes like this:

BULL SHIT, BULL SHIT, BULL SHIT, BULL SHIT, BULL SHIT, BULL SHIT, BULL SHIT …

Try it …………… no, aloud. It’s got great rhythm like most truth does.

Now anyone who is just this side of mental retardation knows all this already. But Tubularsock likes to keep his eye on the prize and that is that repetition keeps the facts from falling down that sucking rabbit hole. You see once the news cycle spins the bull shit to scare you then they move on and funny thing ……. they don’t review. Especially when the “new facts” show that the stories being pushed are FALSE. It’s called propaganda.

Which brings Tubularsock to this, that may have been skipped over by the maimed-streamed-media. A document released by NSA whistleblower Edward Snowden revealed that Ibrahim al Samarrai AKA Abu Bakr al Baghdadi, the man who leads ISIS, is an intelligence asset. Well imagine that!

An Intelligence Asset? You know, a CIA patsy. And he is the guy that is leading this evil of all evil (besides Dick Cheney) military operation.

Funny story, Abu Bakr al Baghdadi was radicalized by the 2003 invasion of Iraq and was captured in 2005 and spent four years in the United States’ Camp Bucca where he was constantly humiliated by the American forces much like the torture and humiliation conducted at Abu Ghraib Prison.

So here we have exactly why attacking and bombing isn’t effective. By doing it it only creates more terrorists and humiliation is a very powerful factor in solidifying resolve.

It has been reported that ISIS has grown in number by over 6000 since the beginning of this American bombing escapade. Now exactly what is it about the reality that bombing and drones create MORE terrorists that the Western mind doesn’t seem to understand?

It was reported around September 8th that Abu Bakr al Baghdadi had been killed by the American bombing but it still hasn’t been officially confirmed. But even if this is true Tubularsock hopes we don’t have to go through that same silly game that we did with Osama bin Laden’s death —— do you recall, he was reported “confirmed-dead” seven times! And now that he is reported at the bottom of the sea we still can’t say for sure that he isn’t hiding out in Geneva, Switzerland.

And did “killing” bin Laden even matter to al Qaeda? Nope!

And if true, will Abu Bakr al Baghdadi death matter to ISIS? Nope!

And if someone on Halloween reaches into Dick Cheney’s chest cavity and rips out his previously-owned heart and eats it ……… will that end evil? Well, Tubularsock thinks it may be a good start!

TUBULARSOCK SAYS: FOREIGN POLICY?

Posted: October 15, 2014 in Advertising, Afghanistan, American Exceptionalism, Assad, Bagdad, Bandar bin Sultan, boots on the ground, Bull Shit, Chemical Warfare, CIA Drugs, CIA TERRORISTS, Cuba, CYBER-ATTACKS, Death Valley Days, Diane Feinstein, Dick Cheney, Economy, FBI, FBI TERRORISTS, Flight MH17, freedom of the press, Guantanamo, GUATEMALA, Iran, IRAQ, ISIS, ISRAEL, Justin Bieber, Kim Kardashian, Michelle Obama, Neo-Nazi, NSA, Obama, Oil, PALESTINIANS, Russia, SYRIA, TERRORISTS CREATED BY U.S., The Matrix, torture, U.S. General's ethics, War Criminals
Tags: al Qaeda, barack obama, bull shit, CIA, Dick Cheney, drones, Human Rights American Failure, middle-east, NSA, Obama foreign policy, Rule of Law, Russia, Syria, terrorism, Ukraine

THE WAKING SLEEP . . .

Posted: September 23, 2014 in Assad, Bagdad, boots on the ground, Bull Shit, CIA TERRORISTS, FBI TERRORISTS, Flight MH17, IRAQ, ISIS, Kayne West, Kim Kardashian, NATO, NSA, Russia, SYRIA, The Matrix, Ukraine
Tags: al Qaeda, barack obama, Human Rights American Failure, Iran, libya, NSA, Putin, Russia, Syria, terrorism, Ukraine

Now Tubularsock was separating bull shit from reality with his new invention known as the BULLSHIT REMOVAL EXTRACTOR. Yes, Tubularsock knows that “removal” and “extractor” are redundant but you’ll have to admit so is BULLSHIT!

Anyway, there is not a whole lot to do in Tubularsock’s top floor corner office in his underground bunker in Oakland, CA overlooking Washington, D.C. so Tubularsock has to keep busy exposing the BULLSHIT REDUNDANCY . Hey, it’s like a quest!

ISIS seems to be ALL that is happening in the entire world if you pay attention to the maimed-street-media.

Well guess what fellow travels ………..

Not much has changed ……. it is all focus.

NSA are still spying on you …… nothing has changed. Congress spoke about being upset and going to do something BUT they went on their “Summer Recess” and then ISIS appeared and they voted to support bombing them and then called for a “surprise” break and they won’t return until the FIRST WEEK IN DECEMBER! Oh yeah, just in time for their Christmas Recess. No, really Congress is going to be in session for a good four days this year …… really? Tubularsock’s sure of it, if you count what they have accomplished!

Hello …….. planet earth can you read me?

Oh, and MH-17 is still being investigated by the “international-community” (aka the united states being omni-present) and the first emphasis was that the investigation was NOT going to cast “blame” but they are going to investigate the “facts”.

Bottom line is that the Puppet-Ukrainian-Government supported by the United States shot down the Malaysian passenger plane and the Russians and the Russian Ukrainian Supporters were not responsible. Those are the facts that are coming out of the investigation but the maimed-streamed-media just doesn’t seem to notice.

And then there is ……. wait for it ……… the Kim Kardashian nude “hacked” photos!

You know in truth, Tubularsock doesn’t know who in the fuck Kim Kardashian really is but she seems to appear every time any odd international news crops up.

And seriously, have you ever seen Kim in her “regular-clothes?” It is all focus.

How is “nudity” different?

And Tubularsock doesn’t want to pry, but when was the last time YOU took photos of yourself nude and posted them so they could be hacked?

Oh ……… the BULLSHIT REMOVAL EXTRACTOR is going off the charts so Tubularsock has to cool down the system …….. Like later!

TUBULARSOCK SAYS: ALL ONE

Posted: September 20, 2014 in Abu Bakr Al-Bagdadi, Afghanistan, American Exceptionalism, Bagdad, boots on the ground, CHEMICAL WEAPONS, CIA TERRORISTS, FBI TERRORISTS, Flight MH17, GUNS, IRAQ, ISIS, ISRAEL, Joe Biden, John Kerry, Kim Kardashian, Michelle Obama, NSA, Obama, Oil, SYRIA, TERRORISTS CREATED BY U.S., The Matrix, torture, Ukraine
Tags: al Qaeda, barack obama, CIA, global arms trade, Human Rights American Failure, middle-east, Obama foreign policy, Rule of Law, Syria, terrorism, Ukraine

TUBULARSOCK SAYS: LEAD FROM BEHIND

Posted: September 13, 2014 in Afghanistan, American Exceptionalism, Assad, Bagdad, Bandar bin Sultan, CHEMICAL WEAPONS, CIA TERRORISTS, Crimea, Cuba, Diane Feinstein, Dick Cheney, Don Rumfeld, Drones, FBI TERRORISTS, Flight MH17, Guantanamo, HEZBOLLAH, Iran, IRAQ, ISIS, ISRAEL, James Clapper, Joe Biden, John Kerry, Kim Kardashian, Michael Hastings, Michelle Obama, Neo-Nazi, NSA, Obama, Obama win?, Oil, PALESTINIANS, Rose Garden, Russia, Russia-Syria Chemicals, SOLITARY CONFINEMENT, SYRIA, TERRORISTS CREATED BY U.S., The Matrix, torture, Ukraine, Zionism
Tags: al Qaeda, barack obama, Benghazi, Big Oil, CIA, Diane Feinstein, Dick Cheney, global arms trade, Human Rights American Failure, middle-east, North Africa, NSA, Obama foreign policy, Rule of Law, Syria, terrorism

TIME MACHINE DISCOVERED

Posted: September 4, 2014 in American Exceptionalism, CIA TERRORISTS, CYBER-ATTACKS, debt, economics, Economy, ethics training, Fiscal cliff, FREEDOM, freedom of the press, Gulag mentality, ISIS, Joe Biden, John Kerry, Kayne West, Kim Kardashian, Neo-Nazi, NSA, Nuremberg Trials, Obama, OccupyWall Street, Quantitative Easing, Ron Reagan, Russia, TERRORISTS CREATED BY U.S., The Matrix, torture
Tags: al Qaeda, barack obama, Big Oil, CIA, drones, global arms trade, Human Rights American Failure, middle-east, Rule of Law, Russia, terrorism, war

Now here is something that you won’t believe. Tubularsock has discovered an operative TIME MACHINE. Hey really, it is up and running and YOU haven’t even noticed!

It’s amazing at several levels. First, it’s right in front of you. Second, you don’t have to climb into it. Third, it is operating as Tubularsock writes this information to you.

Fasten your seat belt, expect tubebulence!

It appears to Tubularsock that this new 21st century TIME MACHINE was plugged in a long time ago maybe all the way back to Babbling-Alzheimer-Ridden Reagan but no matter, it is manifesting NOW so that is where we are in TIME MACHINE present moment time!

The United States has become a combination of (perhaps due to cross wiring within the TIME MACHINE) the end of the Roman Empire combined with the ultimate Fascist State. ( jump back, fucking Hitler!)

The government and the corporation are one and the same, hence: Fascism!

Now, Tubularsock knew there’d be doubters.

Fucking look at the facts …………. everything the United States Government does is TO PROTECT NATIONAL INTERESTS.

Now the American public THINKS that THAT is them but it is not! PROTECT NATIONAL INTERESTS is capitalistic profit and control speak for their profit and their control! That is the reality, period!

The United States Empire Direction is crumbling and this was foretold by putting a BLACK Man in the WHITE House. See the color contrasting problem?

The White Power Structure needed a scapegoat so what better scapegoat than a Black Man. Especially a Black Man who only looks FORWARD! (He’d fucking freak out if that fucker looked back!)

And just like the Roman Empire we have troops and mercenaries throughout the world destabilizing areas so to conquer them as servant-states. (in the old days they were called colonies but we’re past that, we’re modern!)

ALSO our economy and monetary policies are crumbling because we have sunk to a belief that denial is the operative solution.

It is all falling apart as it did for the Romans. Wow, time flies …………

At the same time as the Roman Empire is crumbling (476 C.E.) and the Fascist State is solidifying (1930’s AD) we have a Caliphate forming before our very eyes. We are talking about the 600 BC here!

Wow! This TIME MACHINE is awesome!

No really, tell Tubularsock ……… how often have you seen the fall of the Roman Empire, the rise of the Fascist State and the formation of a Caliphate ALL AT THE SAME TIME?

Which only goes to prove that TIME IS AN ILLUSION.

But this is the 21st Century for Christ sake! Top this:

Add to all of this THE COLD WAR!

Yes, Ladies and Gentlemen, THE COLD WAR too!

You get the fall of the Roman Empire …..

You get the rise of the Fascist State …..

You get the formation of a Caliphate …..

AND THE COLD WAR TOO!

ALL FOR ONE LOW PRICE!

A box set just in time for the holiday season!

And if you act now Tubularsock will toss in ***** AT NO EXTRA CHARGE*****

Joe Biden’s new hit single: “FOLLOW YOU TO THE GATES OF HELL”

SO ACT NOW ******* ONLY $19.95

CALL NOW 1 800 BUY-TUBE

********************************************

Ok, Tubularsock got a little carried away here. Shows you what happens when the dream of short term profit overcomes long term thinking.

In such a short time period the U.S. came from “saving the world” from the clutches of evil Fascism and destroying Communism to being the ultimate Fascist-Police-State and attempting to bomb-drone-and-torture the world into lockstep-order TO PROTECT OUR NATIONAL INTERESTS.

Well it’s not working. Self interest will win the day and it may be a surprise but other countries in the world have their own self interests too.

It will be fun to see Germany, Russia, and China form an economic bloc. The old day fascists and commies finding their home grown roots against the present day U.S. fascist-police state.

What will the TIME MACHINE show us next? Just maybe Tubularsock will have figured out the dials and buttons in the TIME MACHINE by then. Ahh, what adventures await.

NEW OLD NEWS: Deja vu ?

Posted: July 17, 2014 in American Exceptionalism, CIA TERRORISTS, economics, Economy, FREEDOM, freedom of the press, GUATEMALA, HEZBOLLAH, IRAQ, ISIS, ISRAEL, Kayne West, Kim Kardashian, Mental Health, NSA, Obama, PALESTINIANS, REPUBLICANS, SYRIA, TERRORISTS CREATED BY U.S., The Matrix
Tags: al Qaeda, barack obama, CIA, global arms trade, Human Rights American Failure, Iran, Kim Kardashian, middle-east, NSA, Obama foreign policy, Syria, terrorism

NEW OLD NEWS: Deja vu ?

Well Tubularsock was sitting in his top floor corner office in the underground bunker overlooking Washington, D. C. from Oakland, CA. and it’s Deja vu all over again.

Remember in the Matrix when Neal sees a black cat twice and says, Deja vu ? And everybody freaks because that is a sign that there’s a change in the matrix. Which means that they have been detected while on a mission.

Or remember the magician who does slight-of-hand right in front of you but he’s able to divert your attention so he can trick you? Time and again, and again and …….

It appears to Tubularsock that all the news around the world is all playing back old programs and attempting to convince us that it’s new.

Now would you people with cable TV with 6,0304 channels put up with reruns of all last years and previous years shows being played over again. (no, hold it ….. Tubularsock knows you would because you already do ……. but there’s more.)

And on top of that sell you the idea that it’s all new programing. And because of that the cable rates are going to go up 50%.

Well, that’s what we got here folks ………….. illusion

Israel is bombing Palestine AGAIN and Palestine is sending these ratty-ass “missiles”

back at Israel. As well as their regular supply of rocks.

Tubularsock thinks it’s time to sell some dependable missiles to Palestine. The crap they are trying to attack Israel with is shit. Who is providing them with weapons? The United States sells weapons to anybody. Why not Palestine? Their money’s good. Right?

Business is business, come on capitalists, where is that “free market” spirit?

And then there’s Tubularsock’s good friends at ISIS. Allah be tazed.

Palestine could hook up with them because now ISIS can provide Palestine with American missiles, trucks, helicopters, tanks, planes, and even 90 lbs. of raw nuclear stuff.

Now don’t worry, the officials who know nuclear stuff say, “There is nothing to be alarmed about a group of highly armed-psychopathic-homicidal-maniacs with a 13 century vision acquiring this raw-nuke-shit.”

Aren’t we so lucky …….. wow, and for a minute Tubularsock started to worry.

And then all the fucking immigrant children that are flooding our boarders. You know those boarders that we have put fences up, check points, Boarder Patrols those boarders! And Homeland Security hasn’t scanned any of these children upon entry because they aren’t cooperating like terrorist do and come in through airports! Shit!

Now what is that all about?

Why are the immigrant children picking on us? Why don’t they just go back to their dictatorships that the United States set up for them. Ungracious foreigners!

No, what is happening is just regular TV programming. It is more economical for the major maimed-stream-media to re-run old news than to send out reporters to gather new news. Really, you can see that can’t you?

And it is so American!

The citizens of the United States sit by as the Government and corporate interests take their houses, send their children off to endless wars, renege on their retirement, close down their public libraries, schools, parks and replace them with for profit zones, replace their jobs, break up their unions and spy on each and everyone of them. Yet those citizen just can’t get up from their 60” Plasma televisions and go to the streets to protest any of that.

BUT they can grab their American flags and paint signs and go out into the heat to tell children to go back to where they come from and act like they are taking charge of their empty white-ass lives. FUCKING PATHETIC!

And to top this all off the Kim Kardashian Video Game is “on track to earn $200 million!”

Now Kim’s game is called Kim Kardashian: Hollywood !

Is that just fucking awesome or what? And the entire point of the game ……. wait for it,

is to get your avatar to recharge itself with enough energy to attend all the photo shoots and club openings necessary to journey from the E-list to the A-list.

Now isn’t that just what everyone really wants to do with their lives ……….. go from the E-list to the A-list in Hollywood?

Now the game itself is a FREE download so where does Kim get her 45% of the net profits of the $200 million sales?

Well, the game is free but to upgrade your avatar power position so you can get yourself to the Hollywood A-list quicker you have to pony-up nearly $500! AND HERE’S WHERE STUPID COMES IN ……….. thousands of people are willing to do this.

Dumb fucks is too weak of a term to describe these dumb fucks!

And some people always seem to wonder, “How does the government and corporate interests seem to get away with what they do without any negative consequences being imposed on them.”

Deja vu, ASK KIM.

NEWS BEFORE IT HAPPENS: THE SECRETARY OF THE INFERIOR — MISSING?

Posted: July 2, 2014 in American Exceptionalism, ART, ASSAULT WEAPONS, Bagdad, BRADLEY MANNING, Bull Shit, bull shit as an art form, CIA Drugs, CIA TERRORISTS, CYBER-ATTACKS, Dick Cheney, Don Rumfeld, economics, FBI, FBI TERRORISTS, FED, FREEDOM, freedom of the press, General Keith Alexander, General Stanley McChrystal, Guantanamo, GUATEMALA, Gulag mentality, GUNS, Hamid Karzai, Holiday jobs 2013, Infallbiility, James Clapper, Jay Z, Joe Biden, John Kerry, John MaCain, Jon Stewart, Justin Bieber, Kayne West, Keystone XL, Kim Kardashian, Leon Panetta, Mental Health, Michelle Obama, NSA, Obama, OccupyWall Street, PALESTINIANS, Poppies, Pussy Riot, Quantitative Easing, Radiation, REPUBLICANS, Ron Reagan, Russia, Senate Intelligence Committee, TERRORISTS CREATED BY U.S., The Matrix, U.S. General's ethics, Ukraine
Tags: al Qaeda, barack obama, Benghazi, Bradley Manning, bull shit, CIA, current-events, Diane Feinstein, Dick Cheney, FBI, global arms trade, Human Rights American Failure, Iran, John McCain, Keystone XL pipeline, middle-east, NSA, Obama foreign policy, politics, Rule of Law, terrorism, Ukraine, world peace treaty

From a series of informed sources who are not authorized to speak on this issue but have nothing else to do today in the bloated government bureaucracy has presented an outline of the influence of the new Secretary Of The Inferior on the Obama Administration.*

The Tubularsock News Team has also sent our stealth photographer into the mix and has documented photographic evidence of all the rumor and innuendo.

As we like to say at the Tubularsock News Team break-room, “If a picture is worth a thousand words then this story is worth ten thousand words!”

Rather than be accused of conflict of interest we have turned our investigative journalism over to the tabloid, The New York Toast.

From the very beginning fear in the Administration was palpable. Could a “commoner” be able to bond with the elite?

Well, our inside sources all concurred that the new Secretary Of The Inferior fit like a hand in a glove.

The new Secretary Of The Inferior was asked by the press how he felt to be at the left hand of The President of the United States and he clearly stated, “no, the steak tartare please”.

The more comfortable the Secretary Of The Inferior became the more cautious distrust appeared within the West Wing. In fact, down right suspiciousness of his intentions were felt and cloaked in plutocratic innuendo.

This type of approach to an obvious “outsider” was lost on the Secretary who felt that they liked him. But he started to isolate himself in the President’s office.

That suspicious attitude became more prevalent within the President himself.

However the Secretary Of The Inferior and Michelle became more ……..

Say ………… ahh, shall we say “friendly”?

Not being sure of the Secretary Of The Inferior’s intentions Obama started to take him with him whenever he traveled.

And then one day the President and the Secretary Of The Inferior were scheduled to fly to the Asian Conference in Kuala Lumpur.

Now in any Presidential Administration lots of stuff gets stolen. Paper clips, ball point pens, computers, ground-keeper tools, ballistic missiles, large sums of cash, larger sums of cash, cash of larger sums than that and one’s integrity.

The biggest surprise is that anyone noticed.

Immediately Congress formed two committees, one in the House and one in the Senate. Each committee member and staff took it upon themselves to fly to Kuala Lumpur to see where Air Force One should have landed if it hadn’t been stolen.

It was verified that there was NO, they repeated NO, Air Force One on any golf course in Kuala Lumpur.

Senator John McCain was unable to say, “The terrorist have been part of this Obama Administration for some time and the Ukrainian people need all ….. no, I mean Palestine has to be considered ….. no, I mean …”

The CIA, NSA, DIA, NGA, NRO, AFISRA, MI, MCIA, ONI, OICI, I&A, CGI, FB/NSB, DEA/ONSI, INR, and the TFI were all called into service but many of them were out of the office so a message was left with their respective receptionists. **

All of these agencies work separately and together to conduct intelligence activities and are under the I.C. which is headed by the DNI, who reports to the President.**

The FBI, DOS, DSS, IRS-CID, TIGTA, USMP, DOD, DCIS, CID, OSI, NCIS, DOJ, ATF, USDI, USDA, DOC, HHS, DHS, USCG, FPS, CGPD, CBP, ICE, USSS, SPS,USCP, USPIS were also all put on the case. **

It appears that the USPIS (United States Postal Inspection Service) may have not been necessary however Senator Diane Feinstein insisted that it was not because her husband was well invested in post offices that the agency must play a role. It was because of “. . . her keen concern to protect every woman and child of this great land”.

As Senator Feinstein did not say, “That plane could have been easily packed up in a pre-postage-paid-priority-mail-express-package and shipped to the Russians for all we know!”

As a result over seventeen million dollars will be allocated to throughly inspect ALL the P.O.Boxes in every post office within the United States.

Representative Robert Fuckoff (R) Ohio demanded that for national security concerns he would pursue drafting a bill to create an inspection team to investigate all “general delivery” windows of every post office in the United States.

During an impromptu stop over at the employee’s break room at Postal Inspection, Inc. Rep. Fuckoff stated, “This twenty-seven million dollar allocation bill will ensure that inspections would be conducted on all “general delivery” locations. What better way is there to protect our citizens from terrorists who want to harm our home-land?”

When the maimed-stream media asked about the rumor that his family was involved in Postal Inspection, Inc. Representative Fuckoff stated, “Those accusations have been made before!”

……………………………………………

A Special Blue Ribbon Committee was appointed immediately if not sooner by the President to “investigate the disappearance of Air Force One and The Secretary Of The Inferior” and to report back to him. The President insisted that the Committee’s work would be totally transparent and would be held in secret for national security reasons.

The maimed-stream media didn’t pursue the definition of transparent assuming the President is a Constitutional Scholar and knew the definition better than they.

Congress announced that it will immediately take up the issue of funding the Special Blue Ribbon Committee as soon as they return from their inter-session break and before their fall break. This leaves “. . . a corridor of six full hours” stated Senator DipStick (D) from Louisiana.

First there were the sightings.

(UPI) “They were ALL there”, said Jimmy Insano from DelRio, Texas. “Right out in front of the Dairy Queen! Elvis, bin Laden, Kennedy and the Secretary Of The Inferior!”

“I didn’t see no plane or anything like that …… but I didn’t go in the Dairy Queen. Sure, it could have been in there.”

The heat in DelRio at times reaches 135 degrees in the shade.

(The Sun, UK) “The chances of Air Force One being snatched from the sky by an alien space craft isn’t as far fetched as it may appear” says Jay Jay Johnson. “There have been sightings recently as far away as Denver”, he continued. “Space IS the final frontier, you know, and if and I’m saying IF, The Secretary Of The Inferior had been sent with a message to give to extraterrestrials, then why not?” Jay Jay Johnson concluded.

(New York Times) It was reported today that the Malaysian Government was asked by President Obama to assist in the tracking of the missing Air Force One. Critics say this new development has created perhaps a “hint” that the President isn’t sincere about finding the Secretary Of The Inferior.

President Obama’s new Press Secretary Josh Earnest, stated at todays news briefing that “. . . he was earnest that the President was earnest about the search for Air Force One as well as The Secretary Of The Inferior”.

This confused the White House Press Corp because they thought the President was not Earnest because Josh Earnest was Earnest. And Josh Earnest stated that he was earnest and the President was earnest as well. The White House Press Corp reiterated that Earnest was Earnest and Earnest was not Obama.

After forty-five minutes the Earnest – earnest conundrum was tabled until a later date.

(FOX News) Donald Rumsfeld was asked to comment on the incident and stated: “we know, there are known knowns; there are things that we know that we know. We also know there are known unknowns; that is to say we know there are some things we do not know. But there are also unknown unknowns, the ones we don’t know we don’t know.”

And he continued, “The missing Secretary Of The Inferior is the ultimate in unknown unknowns, if you ask me.”

And of course, Dick Cheney was asked for comments on this new international mystery but was unable to make it to the interview because he had “left his heart in San Francisco” and hadn’t noticed until his flight was over Wisconsin. Which at that point had to turn his flight back to the West Coast.

footnotes:

* To catch up with The Secretary Of The Inferior refer back to: blog post, NEW EMPLOYMENT, NEW ECONOMY.

** Those are all investigating agencies of the United States Government. Tubularsock doesn’t have time to make that much shit up!

All photographs may look like they have been altered in some way. They have NOT! However they are a different angle from the original photo.

Photography is in the eye of the beholder.

Tubularsock

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NEWS BEFORE IT HAPPENS: THE SECRETARY OF THE INFERIOR — MISSING?